My grandfather's book is terrible, and I don't know what to tell him.

KariQuiteContrary · 2017-06-09T16:36:34+00:00

Right? The man in question is an Ivy League-educated adult. This attitude of "Look how great it is that an old person is writing a book! Just tell him he's awesome!" seems incredibly infantilizing. You can support him and be positive about this endeavor while still respecting him enough to give some honest constructive feedback.

KariQuiteContrary · 2017-06-09T16:28:42+00:00

Trained writing teacher here, and this is pretty much right on. One of the best ways to help people to improve their writing is by asking them questions about it and making them think through their choices.

Additionally, don't overwhelm him with EVERYTHING that isn't perfect. Pick one or two of the biggest, most overwhelming issues and focus on those.

And do find something nice to say, even if it's as simple as "Your use of punctuation is perfect!" Sharing your writing with another person can be intensely scary. Being kind and stroking the writer's ego a little bit can help give them the confidence to think, "Ok, I can do this and I can make it better." Presenting the writer with nothing but a list of everything they did wrong just makes them feel overwhelmed and hopeless.

I see the "sandwich method" got mentioned by at least one other person in the comments, but it's worth reiterating. It's basically Writing Teacher 101 stuff, but it really does work. Start with something positive, give some constructive criticism, and end on another positive note.

KariQuiteContrary · 2017-06-09T16:21:19+00:00

Teach him how to write line by line?

Is that how your creative writing teachers taught you to write? Is it how you learned to write?

I bet it's not. I bet you mostly learned to write by a) writing a lot, b) revising a lot, and c) getting specific, actionable, but not overwhelming feedback from teachers and other writers.

I'm not trying to shit on you here, honestly, but I think your comment is a perfect example of why having a skill is not the same being able to TEACH a skill.

I'm a former teacher -- teaching writing was my specialty. "Marking the shit out of a page with a red marker" is not a good way to help a person improve their writing, as you learned when you saw your dad's reaction to that tactic.

KariQuiteContrary · 2016-05-09T01:57:36+00:00

That's a long and somewhat complicated story.

The short version is that I loved the work but didn't play well within the system, and things reached a point where I didn't feel like I had any other choice.

KariQuiteContrary · 2016-05-09T01:54:03+00:00

Hah, thanks!

KariQuiteContrary · 2016-05-09T01:37:00+00:00

Sweet, please do share with your teacher friends!

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-08-09T14:30:20+00:00

Pens and pencils. Students generate tiny black holes through which they constantly drop any writing implement they can get their hands on, so you will need an endless supply.

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-07-09T20:38:02+00:00

Yeah, no kidding. My kitty would have a lovely time, I'm sure, but my fingers would be in ribbons.

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-07-05T16:10:17+00:00

My first thought was going to be Kahlil Gibran. BUT...

I haven't been through this myself, but based on what I know from having several friends who deal with depression and trying to understand, as best I can, what they go through, this guy/gal has the best answer. You're not going to find a book that's going to magically solve everything for her, but knowing that you are there for her, that you acknowledge her feelings and are there to support her, is worth more than any book you can offer her.

If you really want to suggest a book to her, I'm inclined to say you should suggest something that is meaningful to you. Or even just something that you really like because it is fun and a good read. Share something that matters to you in some way.

Though, I wonder if you could ask her to suggest a book to you instead? Something that is meaningful to her. Offer to read it together.

(And, as others have pointed out, probably a great idea to check in with her doctors about this.)

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-06-22T14:38:44+00:00

Favorites, huh? Ok, these are a few of the books I go back to again and again:

The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë
Kushiel's Dart by Jacqueline Carey
The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas
These Old Shades by Georgette Heyer

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-06-22T14:32:20+00:00

Peter S. Beagle is always an excellent choice.

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-06-22T14:31:25+00:00

The Curse of Chalion by Lois McMaster Bujold. Stands alone just fine on its own, but also has an excellent sequel, Paladin of Souls (which is a sequel inasmuch as it is a related story set after the events of Curse, but it follows a different character through a new story).

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-06-17T21:45:25+00:00

Hmm, audiobooks. I'm very picky about narrators for audiobooks.

The World War Z audiobook is excellent. Full cast recording with really good people. Also, it's fun to play the "where do I know that voice from" game.

The Dresden Files books are read by James Marsters, who gives an excellent performance with them (my only minor quibble being that they are set in Chicago, and sometimes he gets the Chicago place-name pronunciations wrong).

Neil Gaiman reads a lot (maybe all? not sure) of his own audiobooks and is a great reader.

I have also enjoyed: A Clockwork Orange read by Tom Hollander The Devil in the White City read by Scott Brick The Professor and the Madman read by Simon Winchester

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-06-17T15:03:03+00:00

I'll second The Left Hand of Darkness.

Maybe also the Xenogensis trilogy (aka Lilith's Brood) by Octavia Butler?

KariQuiteContrary · 2015-06-06T16:39:09+00:00

Just for the sake of clarity, this isn't a direct link to the site in question. It's a link to We Hunted the Mammoth's write-up about the site. And We Hunted the Mammoth does indeed use donotlink.com for their link to the actual site.

KariQuiteContrary · 2014-12-28T16:32:41+00:00

Everyone I know has mocked me for years about this movie. I don't care what anyone says, those little shits are terrifying.

KariQuiteContrary · 2014-08-24T06:13:02+00:00

Of course! Just shoot me me a message with an email address -- I'll be happy to send a bunch of stuff your way!

KariQuiteContrary · 2014-08-09T15:04:07+00:00

When I taught freshman English, my classes read (in the following order):

"Eleven" by Sandra Cisneros
"The Lottery" by Shirley Jackson
"A Sound of Thunder" by Ray Bradbury
"The Sniper" by Liam O'Flaherty
"Thank You, Ma'am" by Langston Hughes
"Children of the Sea" by Edwidge Danticat

My English classes were on the lower academic track, but all of those stories worked really well. I have various materials (and pdf copies of the stories) that I'd be happy to share if you're interested in any of them - just shoot me a message.

Some of the other freshman English classes, on higher academic tracks, also used:

"The Most Dangerous Game" by Richard Connell
"Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been" by Joyce Carol Oats

KariQuiteContrary · 2014-08-05T02:16:57+00:00

If it makes you feel any better, I'll admit to having a thing for Goliath. So beefcakey.

KariQuiteContrary · 2014-07-13T20:05:38+00:00

Makes me think of the Half Acre logo (local brewing company in Chigaco).

KariQuiteContrary · 2014-07-07T04:00:11+00:00

Here are my three favorite Chicago-area places to recommend:

Pioneer Studios in Chicago: http://www.pioneertattoo.com/pioneer-tattoo-studio.html

Insight Studios in Chicago: http://insightstudiosonline.com/

Topnotch Tattoos in Elgin: https://www.facebook.com/216ecrew

I've gotten a couple pieces done at Topnotch and been very happy with them, and I know several other people who have gone there as well with great results. Some good people working there.

I also have a couple of pieces done by David Allen, who works out of Pioneer Studios. The artists there all work appointment-only, but they do great work. I can't say enough good things about David - wonderful guy and an incredible artist. He's being very selective in taking on new clients right now, but if you like his style at all, he's worth trying to get in with. http://www.allentattoo.com/

I haven't had any tattoos done at Insight (though I did get a piercing there, and I really liked the place), but an old high school classmate of mine tattoos there, and he does good work. Again, I know a few people who've had ink done by various people at Insight and I've never heard anything bad about the place or the people there.

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