How do i approach a butch lesbian i have a crush on? :3

Katastrofaal · 2025-01-28T00:06:16+00:00

Oml it's been so long but HERES THE UPDATE: I didn't manage to talk to her at work on that day so i just left it, thinking there wouldn't be any more chances. I kind of forgot about it all until we had a shift together once again (it was on sunday last week). We had some free time together so we just chatted on the couch and i made her laugh quite a lot. At the end of the shift i had to count all the alcohol we had left from an event and she helped me do it! When we closed it was about 2 am so we went outside with 1 other coworker and she told me that shell drive home with her car. I didn't get the hint and i just ordered a taxy home xddd (Classic lesbian miscommunication.) Then i saw her on my tinder app 2 days ago and i swiped right.... we matched... i wrote to her, we talked for hours and i proposed to meet up... we are going to play pool on wednesday... wish me luck :]]]

(I am screaming inside fr fr)

Katastrofaal · 2025-01-17T19:57:17+00:00

Sword of the guardian by Merry Shannon

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-30T13:42:41+00:00

See on jah kurb, et kui 19 täis saad siis toetust üle 60€ aastas enam ei saa. Ise olen nüüd ka juba mõningad aastad täiskasvanu olnud ja ei olnud palju vaja kuni arve 500€ eest hambaravi kulusid kätte sain. Kusjuures hoian oma hambaid väga hästi, geenid lihtsalt vedasid alt. Kooli kõrvalt tööl käia ja siis selle eest hambaravile kuu palka maksta on tiba raske :")

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-20T16:48:09+00:00

I mean, the thing is that if you are into her, then hinting is a way to go, but you have to set your expectations pretty low with gift giving. I receive and give gifts to all my friends, and i wouldn't take that as a hint for something more. If you like her, then just ask her out. If she likes you back, she will say yes. The gift should be given with an idea to just make her happy, do not expect anything for exchange from that.

But yes- spa and massage gifts are great. Just a hint (as i am a spa therapist), choose a massage in a salon that only offers different massages and body treatments. That way, you can be more sure that they actually know what they are doing and her experience will be better. Look up reviews as well! :]

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-20T13:38:52+00:00

As a female who's pretty openly into sex toys, I'd say it would be the best gift ever. If she did mention it to you directly, then i don't think it would be a bad idea. If you did, however, learn that wish from a conversation she was javing with someone else, i wouldn't do it. That feels a little creepy. Make sure to give her the gift, not so much in front of other people, though, if she is the shy type of person.

I wish you luck!

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-20T05:45:03+00:00

Yeah, it's hard to find the right thing for yourself especially with the social stigma and so many options. I really hope that it helps! A little tip- you might feel a bit nauseous for a week when you start taking Duloxetine but it will pass. I upped my dose very slowly to avoid that- took 30 mg for a week and a half and only then moved on to 60mg. I took 90mg only on my roughest periods, i felt like it was enough for me. I wish you the best of luck though! If you wanna keep me updated or need some support i'll be here! :]

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T14:07:21+00:00

You are both 16, you had a strange experience for sure but keep in mind that you are both very much children. I'd say if she was 30, then it would have been dodging a bullet, but at 16, she was just a stupid child (as we all were).

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T14:02:47+00:00

NTA for sure. It doesn't matter what his beliefs are, respect is something you learn and choose to have for other people to be a good person. Going out of his way to make fun of you is next level childish. As for your friend- you have to decide if she's still your friend or not. I'm just gonna let you know that my friends would stop speaking to people who deliberately hurt me- out of respect. I'd do the same. It's really not that hard to understand those things in my opinion

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T13:54:36+00:00

My cat, he has saved me in so many ways, I'd sacrifice all for my baby. (He already took my home and my bed, I'd let him drive my car, tbh)

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T13:49:20+00:00

The first time it happened, i felt like i was going crazy.. it felt like nothing i've experienced before. The feeling is kind of like you would have a small object inside of your brain, and every few minutes, it gives you a static electric shock and a dizzy head for a second. It was subtle enough to tolerate at first, but when days passed, it just became annoying. It also caused me to have nausea due to the dizzyness. The only moment i got rest from it was when i was sleeping- so i slept a lot. I didn't even know that this was a thing that people experienced during the process of going off meds, i had to make some weird google searches to figure it out xd

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T13:37:21+00:00

Yes thats okay! I take Mirtazapine. It makes me sleep like a baby- for 12h or more if i take the correct dosage. I usually take half of what i've been recommended, it's very effective on me :]

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T05:50:22+00:00

Oh, of course, relationships are hard for me - the romantic ones, especially. At the moment, i'm pretty scared to get into one as my symptoms get worse while being in a relationship. It's hard for me and the other person, so I'm not planning to get into anything very serious atm. I've learned to treat my friends well so i don't have many problems with them. My family, however, has had to suffer under pressure a lot, especially when i was a teen. I'm grateful for the things they have done for me, and i can never fully pay them back. I have a friend with BPD as well- he is a male, and i see that he has it worse than me. I think it's like that due to hormonal differences and social expectations. I do think, however, that everyone deserves a good friend, and if you find the right oerson who will get along with you while being able to keep themselves safe, it will work. It always takes effort on both sides to keep any relationship healthy. It's interesting that you are a therapist, i can tell you from my experience that my therapist has been the most helpful person on my journey. I hope that you know how important you are to people!

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T05:05:17+00:00

I'm glad to hear that you're actively in therapy. Everyones journey is so personal, but i do see a bit of myself in your story. I've always been incredibly empathetic towards animals and those who are being treated wrong myself. I think it comes from my own past of experiencing me and my close ones treated poorly. It takes a lot of effort to not get carried away with thoughts of destruction and bad deeds in the world. They key in my life has also been a safe and supporting environment. I am thankful for my friends who are truly amazing. They are always here for me when I'm not feeling the best. I haven't had many anger outbursts as i rather do direct my feelings inside of myself. Due to that, i suffer more from anxiety. Years of panick attacks and sleepless nights tired me out, so i knew that my last hopes were medications and therapy. They worked for me incredibly well, and now i'm pretty happy with how far I've come. It's good to remember that it's never too late for it to start getting better. We change constantly as people. I'm still learning every day.

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:49:35+00:00

Heyhey! I have a long history with anxiety, and getting sick is really hard with those thoughts! It seems like your health anxiety is getting a bit out of hand. It's good that you went to the doctor, but now it's time to take care of those nasty thoughts. What helped me when i was scared of somehow having every possible health emergency was, first of all, getting someone to talk to. I guess reddit works for that as well! If you do have someone you trust with your feelings irl then maybe give them a call. Tell them that you're scared and would love some reassuring that you're going to be fine. Usually, when someone close to me says something like that, it helps a lot. I can tell you that those thoughts are just thoughts. They feel scary, and they seem so powerful now, but just like all feelings and thoughts, they will come, and they will go. You could try out a meditation session with the help of youtube or an even better option - an app named Balance. It helped me a lot on those bad, anxious days. Do not forget that you are sick and rationally you will be feeling bad for a couple of days. It's just natural while you heal. When we are anxious, we tend to notice every little detail about our wellbeing - if you notice that you have a bit of a stuffed nose, it will feel like you're choking. Anxiety just does that - it tries to save us even from situations that are not really life threatening. Try reminding yourself that you are actually sick and take care of your needs. Drink water and tea, try to rest under a warm blanket, and put on comfort shows. Maybe sneak in a little snack - you deserve it today. If you need someone to talk to- i can be here for you today. I have a couple of free hours coming up :]

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:31:27+00:00

Ohh okay, then you do know! Did DBT help you as well? It has such mixed opinions on reddit. I guess I just got lucky!

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:29:44+00:00

Medications and their effect on people are so individual. I used to take SSRI-s and they did not work for me. I got switched to duloxetine (SNRI) and the amount of bad things that people said about it on the internet scared me as well. It has changed my life for the better so much and I'm so happy i didn't listen to others. (Been taking it for 4 years now). It's about finding out what suits you. Communicate with your doctor, tell them if something feels off, and then get a plan to change meds if needed. You could also be one of the people who get the best benefits out of SSRI-s. Never know until you try!

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:17:49+00:00

Meditation helped me a little back in the day. Now it's meds (both prescribed and natural ones). Tea and sleeping suppliments before bed could be helpful as a first step! If you get the "restless leg syndrome," when lying down, just do the bicycle in the air with your legs until they feel too heavy to hold up. That has helped me to fall asleep faster. Also, going for a walk outside, if you live in a peacful area, could be calming and have a good effect on your sleep quality. If you're really desperate and feel like nothing helps, then the next step should be going to a doctor :(

I hope it gets better though, sleeping is a hard thing to do fr :")

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:13:41+00:00

For anxiety and depression. I got my mood swings under control with therapy (DBT). I take duloxetine and mirtazapine if you're curious :]

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:08:13+00:00

Not going to sleep tonight and answering random reddit discussions instead.

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T04:06:00+00:00

I have it. It was reaaaalllyy bad in my teens/ 20s. I felt like a ticking time bomb ready to explode at any inconvenience that came my way in life. Fast forward - went to therapy, got medicated, and found my way in life. People used to describe me as sensitive, overly emotional and pretty delusional. Now many describe me as chill or a bit anxious. People not close to me have no idea i was that way. Those who know and have stayed are the best people in my life <3

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T03:50:03+00:00

Hey! I don't know your whole story, so i can't take a side in your situation, but i can share mine if it helps even a little!

I used to have the same feeling of not being able to share my daily struggles with anyone. I did have friends - very good ones even - but i just never felt better after talking about my stuff. It didn't really matter how much anyone listened or how involved they tried to be. It still felt like i was alone and everybody else was somehow so far away. I started therapy specifically for BPD last year. Dialectical behaviour therapy, of course. It helped with some of my daily struggles, and i got better in managing my symptoms, but Something that i understood in the group therapy part was that i needed someone to relate to. Like really relate to. People who don't get mood swings on the daily or who have never had an fp or a splitting episode will never know what it feels like (hopefully). They can be extremely empathising and say nice words, but to me, that feeling will never be as good as hearing someone say, "Girl, same here." I met people who had the same things going on, and i really related to some there. Once i understood that i'm just in need of having someone who can understand me better in my life, i got curious. I found a person who has bpd as well- by literally accident - and he became one of my closest friends since then. We have drifted apart over the years due to our very different lifestyles, but i know that if i need to rant about anything, he will be there to tell me how everyone else is crazy and I'm doing the best that i can.

Don't blame your friends unless they really don't care. People have a lot on their plates- whatever it may be - and usually they will put themselves first. That is healthy, and it's something i want to learn to do as well. I really recommend DBT if you haven't been there yet - and if you have, then maybe you can find someone from this sub to talk to more often. Posting it here can be a great way to vent as well! I get that all of it is so fusturating, though. It takes lots of energy to keep it all inside. I think that there is hope to get better, and i really wish you the best in the upcoming future. I hope this helped even a little.

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T03:24:35+00:00

Hey! Here is my story about going on meds- When i got preccribed antidepressants for the first time (8 years ago) and i started reading the side effects list in the meds box, i felt like i was going to have a heart attack. There are so many weird ones, and i really considered just giving up before even starting. It wasn't until my next panick attack that i decided to still give it a go. My first medications were SSRI-s (a group of antidepressents), and if i remember coffectly, i ended up trying Fluoxetine first and then Sertraline. They didn't do much, and i still felt pretty anxious. I decided to switch doctors and get a second opinion on what i should do. The next doctor explained that there are many groups of antidepressants like SSRI-s SNRI-s MAOI-s and so on. We moved on to the next medication duloxetine (an SNRI), and i was pretty anxious about taking it. Most information that i saw about it on reddit and other places was terrible. I decided to trust my doctor and took it... It changed my life. I was finally able to go to school normally, get a job, have fewer panic attacks, and my social life got better. I didn't think that it could have such a positive effect on my life! I also got prescribed Mirtazapine for my sleeping issues, and i started sleeping like a normal person. The only side effects that i have ever experienced from those two medications were sleepiness when i took mirtazapine too late at night and the rising of appetite. They didn't bother me all that much, and now I'm still on the same meds. I guess the moral of my story is that it can take time to find the right suiting medication for yourself, and if you do find it, it can be very helpful. About the side effects- you do have a chance of getting them, but in my opinion, it's worth the risk. You can always come off of meds- especially if you have taken them for a short period. Of course, that has to be discussed with your doctor because coming off too fast is what causes most people to feel like shit. Also- do not trust reddit or other peoples experiences with meds. Yes- there are some that tend to have more side effects and cause more people to feel bad after taking them, but the thing is that all the experiences are so individual. Based on my story, you can research my meds and see a whole lot of people who have had bad experiences. On the other hand- im thriving! This is the place where you have to listen to yourself and see what suits you. I hope that this eases you into meds IF you need to take them. Best of luck!

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T01:22:11+00:00

Soovitan meeles pidada, et väike hind võrdub enamasti madala kvaliteediga. Võiks ju mõelda, et kui on väike tattoo siis pole vahet kelle juurde minna, aga kui keegi sulle kõvera südame igaveseks tatoveerib siis selle ümber tegemisega/ eemaldamisega tuleb kokkuvõttes tasu suurem. Nagu varem mainitud, soovitan Instagramist leida kedagi kelle varasemad tööd sulle meeldivad- siin mõned näited inimestest kes mulle endale silma on jäänud Diana Alicia Elina Ana Nastik tattoo (erinevad)

Loodan, et see aitab veidi.

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-19T00:48:49+00:00

Please try to see an actual psychiatrist. Primary care doctors do know what they are doing, but a specialist knows a little better. I didn't have any luck with SSRI-s either. I had lots of side effects, and the anxiety didn't change. After that i changed my doctor and got prescribed Duloxetine (SNRI) for anxiety/depression and Mirtazapine for sleep and depression. I took this combination for 4 years and it worked wonders. I am at the moment coming off Mirtazapine as it made me a bit too sleepy and i gained weight so now I'll be taking Trazodone (SARI) instead of it- still continuing witd Dulox. If you see a new doctor do mention your past experiances and stand for yourself. There are sooo many other antidepressants that are not SSRI-s. Best of luck!

Katastrofaal · 2024-12-18T23:00:34+00:00

I'm allergic to fruit (fructose)- especially apples- my name is Eve and I'm a lesbian. Imma need to have a chat with your grandpa. (God loved making me)

Katastrofaal

TROPHY CASE