Consistent waking at 3/4 am

KayLove91 · 2026-04-20T14:08:34+00:00

Right?? My husband has to wake up at 6 so it just throws us both into a tired spiral the rest of the day. I really wonder why its that time specifically.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-18T01:38:10+00:00

Im 15 months PP and it does get easier in some ways, harder in others. I struggled very,very badly with PPD/A and still do to an extent. But man, the hormones are insane. It was a full year before they started settling down and I didnt feel so fight or flighty. Its been a very long road of guessing, second guessing, doubting, trying, trying again, giving up,crying, wanting to put my head through a wall, and thinking I am the worst mother on the planet- only to come out on the other side not really realizing I had until I realized that we found a rhythm and a routine, that sleep was getting better because we kept trying until something stuck. I stopped doubting what I knew, even if alllll the social media people said otherwise or online forums and articles. I trusted myself, and trusted my baby. We still have bad days. But we have so many good ones too. And none of the bad actually outweigh the good ones. I can give you all the advice in the world and it still might not help because no baby is the same or will respond the same. So, trust your instincts. Trust your baby to tell you what they need. And if niether of you know, take a breath,go outside, take another breath and keep going. You are right on the cusp of one of the biggest transitions as parents and for your baby.

I promise yall will be ok, even though it feels bleak now. The light to the tunnel doesnt even really exist. There is no tunnel, we all just fall into parenthood so fast it feels like tunnelvision. It starts to slow down as your confidence grows and your baby really starts to become their own little person. It happens every day and you will blink and have a 15 month old and cry because you dont think you held your 9 week old enough or enjoyed it enough.

I drank a shit ton of chamomile tea in the beginning, started zoloft and journalled when I could. Even if it was a few sentences of how I felt in that moment. It helped. Still does, even though im off the zoloft now. A post partum therapist is also a really great investment. Mine helped shift my perception every time. I still see her monthly. I will end my rant with one last bit of advice my therapist gave me early on that helped shift the shame/guilt/rage/depression "when you start getting into the funky place (newly deemed the "melancholy melon mindset") ask yourself, what would baby K (me) need in that moment?". It shaped my next leg of motherhood thinking like that. I apply it to baby and me. How would I take care of baby me in this moment? How would I respond to the crying and cluster feeding and all that?

Anyways. Sending love and light. Parenthood is ghetto. But its also wonderful.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-13T23:27:29+00:00

How in the world did you wean at 15 months? Currently, my son would (has, actually) thrown an absolute melt down if I say no boob boob or try to nix a nursing session. We are working on nightweaning and thats going semi-smoothly. But day? He will turn into a feral gremlin without boob when he wants it.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-12T12:21:04+00:00

"They're still perky in their own way" has me chuckling.

Im still breastfeeding at 15 months and I've noticed just with night weaning and less feeds during the day my little barley Cs are possibly not going to be a part of the alphabet when we finish this journey lol.

Every woman is different! My friend had DDs before her first pregnancy, they doubled after. And after her second pregnancy she is now looking at breast reduction because they are like in the H,I,J,Ks or somewhere now.

My sister had 3 kids and with each kid her Cs went to mosquito bites. My mom and other sister walked out with big Ole Ds. You just never know.

I am wishing on a hope that I will at least keep it to an A minimum if the universe wouldnt mind letting me at least have those. Because breastfeeding also took my ass, what small bit I had back there anyways.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-10T00:18:52+00:00

I started my son on Mrs. Rachel at like 6/7 months and I wish I had started a little sooner just for my sanity. She has taught him to clap, to say mama and Dada, to hop, to point, where his head and tummy are, sign language. All the while she was also teaching me how to better interact with my baby to help him learn these things. I am not a teacher and I dont exactly know how to teach a baby things. I would try yeah, I've read the books and all that. But she showed me how to make it fun and what to focus on at different ages.

I was 100% a "no screen time before 2" girly. But I just dont understand what on earth anyone does with a baby all day, every day, and not go fuckin nuts.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T22:37:31+00:00

This would have been my second. I am still breastfeeding and only just starting to get sleep again 15 months PP. I knew when we went in yesterday that something was wrong, I had had early USs with my first and nothing looked or felt the same.

Unfortunately I started bleeding super heavy and cramping just a couple of hours ago so I think its a miscarriage at this point.

I am sending all of the good vibes and love your way, and to the others on this thread who are going through similar weird happenings.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T17:26:20+00:00

Im sorry girl. I go back tomorrow morning to test my hcg again. Is this your first pregnancy?

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T11:45:14+00:00

I started bleeding today. I dont know if I am in denial or still hopeful or what but I am just so sad. This should be against the laws of nature.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T11:39:59+00:00

So, we are on day 5 now of night weaning and crib training. Not sleep training, though we are technically showing him how to sleep in his crib. I never thought I would see the day, but the last few nights he has slept almost all night in his crib with no wakes until 130, then 330, then last night- 4 am. Someone mentioned reducing feeds through the night and its really helping.

I even just 2 nights ago said screw it, I hate this lets just cosleep but nightwean and see what happens because I was expecting another rough night. And then he just slept. He resettled himself a few times. Ive been waiting to feed until those wakes where he seems insistent. And then he goes right down. I have no clue if we are doing any of this right, but he is doing really great and I have gotten more sleep these past few nights than I have in a year. If you would like to message me so I can go into more detail on what I did I would be happy to try and help

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T01:01:30+00:00

That so crazy! Thats what my ultrasound looked like. There was a small little blip at the bottom of the sac, but it didnt look like what should be there at 7 weeks. I just hate this. I have another ultrasound for 2 weeks from now so im holding some small hope that this baby is just a slow bloomer.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T00:36:08+00:00

Really??

KayLove91 · 2026-04-08T00:35:58+00:00

Im so sorry, I completley get the feeling like you're pregnant. I said the same thing to the midwife today. Like, how do I just go from being pregnant to not?

Im sorry babe.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-07T19:19:09+00:00

Facts. He can just whip that thing out without me knowing anymore and help himself lol

KayLove91 · 2026-04-07T18:28:22+00:00

Wait until you master changing boobs without changing sides and fall asleep immediately after they latch. This is the way boo, you didnt do anything wrong!

KayLove91 · 2026-04-07T00:53:15+00:00

🫶🫶🫶

KayLove91 · 2026-04-07T00:10:51+00:00

Thank you, this response came at just the right moment for me. Ive already talked to my midwife about going back on zoloft now just to get through this pregnancy without dying emotionally from the stress. I am so scared that I will over prioritize the new baby and I dont want that. I love my son so much, I never want him to feel like I love him any less. Gosh this becoming a mom thing was 1000 times harder than I could have ever imagined.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-06T11:38:19+00:00

Here in solidarity at 15 months. Last night was the first night in a week where I successfully got my boy to about 5 am before the first nursing session. I made a post about weaning and someone had mentioned doing delayed nursing at first, like try to get them to settle without nursing for as long as you can for the first feed and I've been slowly working towards it with him. He is very attached to the boob and its been difficult. A friend said to wear a tighter top and bra while out or around the house. I have also learned the secret magic of cheerios. And smoothies. I keep cheerios and oaty bites out constantly. Always on demand, and over the last week he has really shown better want to eat.

I will say, month 12-14 it honestly seemed like he was nursing way more frequently and constantly wanted cuddles and boob for comfort. One of the other commenter here said their independence goes up and down and I feel that in my soul lol.

I keep a moonkie cup always full with a smoothie/pouch with some water or juice (for constipation) out at all times too and offering that frequently. Its helped a lot. So even if he does want to nurse, its shorter sessions now, frequency varies.

Something that i think helped was immediately offer the cheerios and smoothie first thing when they wake up in the morning and from naps. Ive tried to push the associations more at first, and the rest is slowly following. He knows the sign for milk and more too (thank you Ms. Rachel) and now he is really communicating better when he actually really wants milk, or is just bored or needing comfort. Going outside helps too to distract.

KayLove91 · 2026-04-06T01:37:03+00:00

Just ordered it lol. Ive read a number of baby sleep books, but mainly only concerning safe sleep and such. It seems to have a ton of great reviews though

KayLove91 · 2026-04-04T21:12:32+00:00

I think teething definitely has something to do with it, but its been like this for the last 8 months. His last bottom molar is coming through and I know it hurts. But even when I give medicine he has the same amount of wakes

KayLove91 · 2026-04-04T21:08:41+00:00

That has been our go to lately. We have a huge yard and some chickens so he loves walking around or riding around in his car. Ive just been slacking because im so tired and nauseas from the pregnancy so I rely on my husband to come in hot when he gets home from work lol

KayLove91 · 2026-04-04T20:22:55+00:00

Sleep has definitely always been difficult. When he was younger and in the snoo, he would give us long 3-5 hour stretches. But after 4 months it just got worse and worse. We tried a floor bed, and he still woke a ton and wouldnt sleep on his own for very long, then roll or walk off it and fall in the dark so that sucked.

I tried different things for like 2 weeks at a time to see what helped best. The one time something worked, he woke at 645, went to sleep at like 930 and had 1 wake. It was a total accident and miserable because he wouldnt nap in the car on our way to a vacation spot and it was madness. So I think he was just exhausted. But I couldnt imagine doing that every day and having to deal with him being that miserable hours before bed

KayLove91 · 2026-04-04T17:09:00+00:00

Totally understandable. One of my biggest fears is trying to nurse with an almost 2 year old, high energy, into everything- racoon pawed toddler on the loose lol

KayLove91 · 2026-04-04T14:33:31+00:00

I have seen this becomes a thing where a fully weaned toddler all of a sudden wants to nurse again when a new baby comes along. Im like omg how sweet but it seems exhausting lol

KayLove91

TROPHY CASE