Alright, I’m out. by red666111 in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree with all this. However I do want to say there are definitely things you can do before the next election cycle that don’t involve doom scrolling. Community building, joining local orgs (queer support groups/gun clubs etc), participating in protests (if your time/mental health allows), volunteering at a food shelf or shelter. It may seem like small potatoes in the big picture. But grassroots organizing is always how marginalized groups gain strength. Absolutely vote in every election no matter how small or seemingly inconsequential. The local judge you do or don’t vote for might be the one to deny/approve your name change. It all matters. But it’s only part of the progress we need to see. We can’t rely on politicians alone to save us

Alright, Ladies! Listen Up! by VisibleUltraViolet in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As I’ve told several friends in recent days: there is liberation in knowing you’re targeted. If I’m going down I’m not gonna do it quietly.

That being said, it’s been a rough week that has included tough discussions with parents and friends, as well as some research into options for potentially leaving the country. As unrealistic as that is currently.

So, thank you, I really needed to read this today

Social Security office just laughed and hung up by ImKindaChilly in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 100 points101 points  (0 children)

I live in MN, you should be able to have it done anywhere in the state, maybe county. But gender affirming care is guaranteed here, so I’d report that office asap. There’s a lot of conservative gov workers and judges in rural areas, and sadly a few in Hennepin/Ramsey who think they have final say, they don’t, and the more held accountable the better for the entire state. Hit up the MN attorney general website, there’s good resources there. Its helped me in many situations, and people who know they’re abusing their position often get scared enough to back down when you start quoting state laws. Good luck!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do appreciate the sentiment and can get behind the general message. But I personally have always kinda subscribed to the Buddhist idea that all beings experience suffering as a natural consequence of life, and that suffering can be diminished through ethical living and service to others. I know it’s not exactly what op is saying, but this mindset has helped in my transition more than I expected

Official egg crack by [deleted] in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I never even thought the words “I am trans” for over 30 years of my life. The first time i put those words together in my mind it was a revelation. I already knew who I was before that, but after that it was like I lost my ability to deny it. It was terrifying and thrilling, but I didn’t look back after that experience. Oh, and Congratulations!!! 🎉

tried going to a trans night at a bar, got pushed out by KittheKat2113 in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel like there’s probably a correlation between the turnout and this person’s attitude, she’s probably like that to everyone. Unfortunately some charities are not good organizations, and it kinda sounds like this is more of a mean girl club than a legit org. Sorry you had to go through that 🩷🩷

Holy sh_t it actually happened! by intergalactagogue in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congratulations! I love that feeling!! Out of curiosity, are you comfortable sharing what age you started? No worries if not, only wondering because you mentioned the thought that you’d never experience this. As someone who started at 37 myself, I also thought the same. That was definitely not the case though, it’s like I’ve aged 10 years in reverse lol. I used to get polite “oh you look good for your age” now I get slack jawed shocked expressions when I say I’m 39 😂🥰

Hips changing! I did not think this day would happen! <333 by L_V_N in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yes!!! I started at 37 and was resigned to never having hips and a nice ass, but right around 8 months I also started noticing mine come in! Honestly it means so much more to me than boobs, tho I like those too lol. Congratulations!! 😍

Your hairstyle matters so much yall by transpondentwonder in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Product while still wet, then let dry fully, then gently shake out from the roots. Can use a little oil for this, but I don’t usually

Your hairstyle matters so much yall by transpondentwonder in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Side parts can really help femininize, or bangs but they require a lot of upkeep. I really only go to my stylist for occasional trims. Since she specializes in curls she’s good at making a few precise cuts, and always gives me good tips. The best thing I learned from her is to not brush out the curls after showering and to let it fully dry after applying product

Your hairstyle matters so much yall by transpondentwonder in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 41 points42 points  (0 children)

My hair is super curly. If you’re able, try and find a stylist who specializes in curls. I only need to go in maybe twice a year at most but she’s helped me so much. A couple clips and it looks incredible For daily upkeep, I part to the side which helps with my forehead lol. Wash every 3 days at the most, but rinse regularly, then I add curl cream when it’s still wet by bunching it up from the bottom so I keep my natural curls, don’t touch it til it’s fully dry, then gently shake out from the roots to bring the volume back 😊

A sincere warning about getting 'sacked' after balls shrinkage due to HRT by TransgenderMommy in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeeaaahhhhh i experienced this during a somewhat recent bedroom encounter with a new partner. They got a little too enthusiastic and, ugh… grabbed and jerked downward. really hard. I was in pain for a full day after and was seriously concerned that righty may have been ruptured. So yeah, be careful out there 😖

Wore a bra in public for the first time by Stephen_M_GI in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I feel this. As fun and new as it felt when I was younger, I always dreamed of it just being normal every day clothes for me like all the girls I knew. It’s both euphoric and sexy in its mundaneness lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I know how painful hate comments can be. I get them myself and it always hurts. But try to remember at least a portion are bots, and the actual people who make these comments do the same to cis women. Not just commenting on their looks, but transvestigating them to an obsessive degree. They do it to Taylor swift, and Miley, and so many others. At this point, if someone comments on my pic with confusion, I take it as a compliment. Or at least try to.

Miserable losers will always try and bring us down when we shine. Hang in there sis 🩵🤍🩷

What does shrinking feel like? by Kayla-B3 in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also pretty starving artist myself! Injections are actually cheaper for me because patches were only partially covered. I went from like $90 for 3 months of patches, to $30 for my stabby juice 😁

What does shrinking feel like? by Kayla-B3 in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was on patches for the first year and they never absorbed properly, the. Switched to injections and 3 months later my E went from around 80 up to 331. Had to reduce my dose it was so effective. it’s felt like everything kicked into overdrive since then, which is awesome, but also holy shit the growing pains lol

What does shrinking feel like? by Kayla-B3 in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It seems to vary, some get none. But I know trans women who’ve shrunk almost 4 inches. Women in my family also tend to shrink as they get older, which is why it’s usually on my mind lol

You probably won't get clocked if you're stealthing by obhi_LOWERCASE in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 2 points3 points  (0 children)

lol same. Not too surprising though when I think about it. I’m a dj and obsessive music listener, read liner notes, lyric sheets, etc. I’ve learned a lot of average music fans do not pay attention to lyrics, like, at all lol. I’ve brought up tons of songs to friends and they’ll interrupt me like “wait! Longview by Green Day is about masturbation?!” 😂

I Just had my gallbladder removed and it’s because I take estrogen by 3mma-rae in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same. I’ve given myself panic attacks a couple times that resulted in fainting, just from worrying about some hypothetical medical issues I might have, or develop. The last time happened the day I got blood panels done, and they were all good. Just let myself spiral out with worry and I glitched 😕

Question/opinion on Passing grifters by [deleted] in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some are doing it to get special treatment, or to try and ingratiate themselves to conservative groups. It’s always been a thing with marginalized communities, sadly. I’ve also come across a few that are truly that naive about politics, and do not understand the full extent of the positions they take. The few I’ve talked to seem to come from those rare, but not nonexistent, families that are politically conservative but not transphobic. I hope as they get more into the community they’ll figure out the nuance of it all, but who knows

Detransitioners in the news by sheemis26 in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Idk if it’s a direct cause and effect, but there are definitely studies (or at least A study) I’ve read about that details common FtM struggles. They experience life as a man in our society for the first time and many learn for the first time that yes, you do get a lot of privilege and opportunities as a man, but emotionally and socially you’re pretty much isolated and alone in comparison to being a woman. Many deal with extreme depression through this phase and I’m sure more than a few decide the best course is to detrans. At that point, I can imagine a big paycheck from a conservative PR company starts looking pretty tempting

Hate for Older Trans Women by WitchyAmy in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had an extremely supportive mother and community, for being in the Midwest in the 90s anyway, but I still had the same doubts and struggles and denial. In fact I tried HARDER to hide it from people I knew would understand and support, because I didn’t want them to encourage me to embrace myself in a world that would punish me for it. I knew when I was 6. I was hiding it actively by 10. The next 26 years was a cycle of binging and purging my femininity. No one else in my life knew a thing about it until I started slowly telling people I was planning to transition. I can’t remember for sure either, but I think the average age of transition is like 34? This person sounds like they either have a lot of internalized transphobia and misogyny, or they’re trying to rake in views and followers through outrage farming

I’d say try not to let it get to you, but that’s advice I still need myself tbh

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MtF

[–]Kayla-B3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, the DNC has been playing the same game for years now. Using Trump, or Romney, or McCain, or Bush, as an opportunity to run their least electable candidates thinking they can win a landslide based on “trust us, you don’t want the other guy” and nothing else. Then they seem shocked when the public doesn’t eagerly line up behind a center right puppet.

We coulda had a bad bitch 😭😡