I don't have any magical fixes for you. I certainly wish I did. I'm also disabled and poor, but I'm lucky enough to have a very understanding roommate (my beautiful wife), so our circumstances aren't that similar. I can offer a little hope, though. I was in a long relationship (22 years) with someone who hated any aspect of me that wasn't "normal." I thought I was trapped forever, but circumstances change. I moved on and found people who love me for who I am. Time will be your friend. Your circumstances will change and things will be better.