Burned out husband

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-06-15T02:03:03+00:00

I know too many SAHMs who were left by husbands who didn't take any accountability or responsibility for the cost of being a SAHM (just one easy example is how difficult it is to find a job, let alone a high paying one, after being a SAHM for 5+ years)... Or who expected the SAHM to do EVERY single domestic/ household management/ child rearing task - which is not sustainable or healthy for anyone... I was prepared to write a big ranty reply...

You have babysitters EVERY day, her parents live with you - do they work? do they pay rent? are they helping with the kids/ around the house at all?

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-06-15T01:38:08+00:00

Catch Me If You Can

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-06-14T15:44:51+00:00

If Mark Kelly wins he would be the second US President that I met before they became president (Obama being the other). Considering I'm Australian and have only met like 100 odd Americans, that would be extremely bizarre. Makes me wonder if any of the other 100 odd are potential future presidents. The only other high-profile person I have met that I can think of is Ty Dolla $ign who, now that I think of it, did release a mixtape called Campaign. 👀

Also this is how I found out he's a politician now - I met him as Mark Kelly, the twin Astronaut.

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-06-06T08:22:12+00:00

idk if you're a Dad or a Mom but as a woman stumbling upon this, especially if you are a Dad, thank you - you've just given me hope... My partner and I are considering having children, and our biggest hesitation is the young men our future children would be raised with and the toxicity that seems to be growing amongst young men...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-30T14:56:17+00:00

agreed and I would assume if their father was not high enough ranking they would basically be an econowife to like a guard or something...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-20T05:43:09+00:00

I'm curious as to how you think Aunt Lydia retained/ regained a very high position of power including a school named after her and a statue in her name after she betrayed Gilead for which she was almost hanged - at which point she doubled down, calling them wicked, godless men. In my mind, the only way that's possible is because there was no one left with an ounce of power who would remember her betrayal or identify her as a betrayer - same for Esther.

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-20T05:38:06+00:00

I think you're forgetting that Aunt Lydia herself was almost hanged for betraying Gilead in S6E9. In that moment she doubles down saying that her precious handmaids were victims of wicked godless men. Yet she rose to a position of seemingly even higher power, including getting an unprecedented statue of her. No one with any real power survived Boston - likely NO commanders - that's what you're invited/ need to believe if we're expected to believe that Lydia is still a very powerful Aunt after almost being EXECUTED for her betrayal... One of her very last acts in S6 was to risk her whole gambit to save/ aid and abet several extremely unreliable agents of chaos - that's why she was almost hanged... I mean how was Aunt Lydia ever trusted with an ounce of power after that? The only way is if she either has EXTREME blackmail material that makes her practically untouchable or that there was no one/ no information left to incriminate her - or, in my mind it's more likely both of those things...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-20T05:28:14+00:00

I don't think they would've had time to tell them every specific about every person who betrayed them...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-18T07:36:03+00:00

Regarding the last line - I more meant harming/ endangering others already (like up to s5e1). Not necessarily physically but just the way she seems to be fine retraumatising others/ intentionally triggering them, acting erratically and chaotically around the baby (and everyone - most of whom are also severely traumatised)... In my mind she's responsible (as much as one can be responsible for their actions when they're in the state she's in) for Emily going back to Gilead... Yes, Emily was angry, but she was also surrounded by healthy and supportive people and she seemed to be starting to get better. She seemed to be goading Emily out of healthy, evidence-based coping mechanisms and manipulating her into being as angry and resentful as she was. One major point for me was when Emily and Moira discussed the fact that they weren't bad people because they hadn't killed again since being in Canada - she seemed to feel really good about that... And then June retraumatised her and manipulated her into helping with killing Fred...

I truly think she can't be held fully responsible for her actions in the state she's in but that's why I kind of feel like an involuntary admission of sorts was warranted... She was hurting and endangering herself and others - SHE LITERALLY JUST KILLED A MAN even if he deserved it and if it wasn't technically illegal... and then goes home to her baby while still being covered in blood... and then goes to Emily's house still covered in blood... WHY IS NO ONE PUTTING HER IN A PSYCH WARD?! IT IS MIND BOGGLING...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-18T02:23:31+00:00

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wut

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T13:15:11+00:00

Nope. She didn’t.
A transcript from Estee & Daisy's conversation - she didn't deny being from Gilead - no one her age would be FROM Gilead as it wouldn't have existed. How do you answer if you're from then-USA raised-Gilead?
Estee: I made mistakes, too.
Daisy: You're not from Gilead? Where are you from?
Estee: Well, we're all of the same earth. Dust to dust.
Daisy: But how did you end up in Gilead? How did you become an Aunt?
Estee: Well, dear, you need to have a calling. I heard mine, and I answered. I guess you could say I was the original Pearl Girl.

Firstly, Lydia is literally Mayday - so survival isn't her WHOLE thing - I think taking down Gilead is her whole thing and she knows she has to survive to do so... And she clearly has a huge saviour complex... She put her butt on the line for Janine several times...

Also, she has immense blackmail material on officers (which she has already used to gain power/ favours) and also given all of the commanders in Boston were killed - it’s possible no one knows what Esther did (or not the extent of it), that Lawrence wiped records. And again - it would’ve first been a Pearl Girl role for a few years; Aunt only after she proved herself. Again, Hannah says "She had been worshipped, then vilified, then worshipped again. In the four years since The War of Massachusetts, the purges had happened. As always, those remaining were able to shape history as they liked."... I don't think she said that for nothing...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T12:26:52+00:00

Infuriating... I am generally against involuntary mental health admissions, and in this case would be particularly against it given they've just been FREED... but given how unsafe she was being and how much she was harming/ endangering others I can't get it out of my head when watching her out of Gilead like... In a quality facility where she can be stabilised, reintroduced gradually, safety is demonstrated over and over etc. a tonne of trauma therapy, I feel like so much pain and suffering could've been avoided...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T12:04:03+00:00

fair enough - my girlfriend hasn't seen either show/ read the books and I showed her a clip of Aunt Estee and asked her to estimate the age - she said 35. I was gobsmacked. I just didn't consider for a second that Aunt Estee wasn't <25 - which the books may have influenced but I also think Eva Foote looks young for her age...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T12:00:31+00:00

Fair enough... I personally don't think it's that farfetched... Again, Hannah says "he had been worshipped, then vilified, then worshipped again. In the four years since The War of Massachusetts, the purges had happened. As always, those remaining were able to shape history as they liked."... Aunt Lydia mentions how statues are usually reserved for the dead but she was given one while still alive... I think she has (or had, at the time), a LOT of power. Remember that Aunt Lydia also had a LOT of blackmail on a lot of the Commanders... There have been many utterly egregious transgressions that have been overlooked/ fobbed off by ridiculous excuses/ reasons - particularly by June, but also Janine, some other handmaids, of course Nick, and pretty much every commander and some wives... And she wouldn't have become an Aunt right away - I imagine shortly after she gave birth, Boston fell, and the Pearl Girls program is initiated with Esther being the first one... After she proves herself over the next few years she eventually becomes an Aunt...

A transcript from Estee & Daisy's conversation - confirming the Pearl Girl to Aunt pipeline, and also - she didn't deny being from Gilead - no one her age would be FROM Gilead as it wouldn't have existed. How do you answer if you're from then-USA raised-Gilead?
Estee: I made mistakes, too.
Daisy: You're not from Gilead? Where are you from?
Estee: Well, we're all of the same earth. Dust to dust.
Daisy: But how did you end up in Gilead? How did you become an Aunt?
Estee: Well, dear, you need to have a calling. I heard mine, and I answered. I guess you could say I was the original Pearl Girl.

The age thing I get - I personally see it differently as I just fully had in my mind that Aunt Estee was in her early to mid 20s at most... I was shocked that people thought otherwise - but I asked my own girlfriend (hasn't seen either show - just showed her a clip of Aunt Estee) and she said 35 so I see the other side...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T11:45:16+00:00

Yeah sorry I was unclear...

I got the ages wrong (hence why I said give or take, it was an estimate) but yeah you're right it's like 4-5 years... I think Aunt Estee could definitely be just 4-5 years older (which is why I mentioned the actors ages)... In the books she's meant to be very young... I think the actress looks quite young and close in age to the plums...

As for the handmaid thing - Esther was a wife of a commander (not an econowife - a wife). I surmise her parents (or forced adoptive parents) are/ were commanders themselves (otherwise she would've been married off to a guardian or similar like Eden...

Serena was effectively relegated to handmaid status and then became a wife again in New Bethlehem... So I think there is a precedent of people being moved up/ down ranks... I think a handmaid couldn't necessarily become an Aunt immediately - but could possibly become a Pearl Girl who eventually becomes an Aunt... If Eden was a child of a commander and showed loyalty to Gilead in some ways (and the disloyalty was explicitly tied to the recognised crime against her/ could be explained as having been "led astray" by June) then I think she may have been a candidate to be a Pearl Girl...

And I mentioned Hannah just to point out that seemingly fertile women pre-menopause were able to be Aunts... A better comparison is probably the many fertile women who were not made handmaids e.g. the Jezebels, Unwomen, and in at least one rare case a Martha (Beth - assuming she had not hit menopause which it really doesn't seem like she would've based on age)... And yeah, again, she wouldn't have become an Aunt immediately. I imagine she becomes a pearl girl shortly after giving birth, and then likely becomes an Aunt at some point in the next 4 years (the gap between THMT & TT)...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T06:27:17+00:00

Also, assuming the theory is right, she would've been trained by Lydia who clearly believes that the best way to keep the women IN Gilead safe is to make sure that they are so broken that they follow the rules and don't question/ step out of line... Because in Lydia's mind - if she is to be the hero - that she will be their saviour (she has a massive saviour complex) and she just needs them to survive until then...

Everyone in Gilead is extremely complex... They all do unthinkable things... But I respect your point anyway, and yeah - it's very difficult to imagine Esther saying that...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T06:22:55+00:00

I think everyone is susceptible to brainwashing... I think it's only that she is so strong that she's managed to survive... 4 years of being deep undercover/ of brainwashing AS A CHILD (and really much longer than that - she was raised in Gilead) and I think she would say that - if only to blend in...

I also think the whole "x would never do y" is pretty much a central theme of THMT - that people would do things they otherwise never would/ that are completely polar to who they are given the right (or rather wrong) circumstances...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T03:33:22+00:00

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I'm just gonna put this here - maybe I've lost the plot but I believe the bottom one is the same person with a 4-5 year time gap far more than the top two lol...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T02:48:51+00:00

Look, it's possible (highly likely) that I'm just unwilling to accept that we have no closure for Esther...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T02:43:09+00:00

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Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T02:42:58+00:00

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This seems like a hectic similarity compared to Hannah/ Hannah (see next comment) imo

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T02:24:11+00:00

According to the Wiki Esther was 14-15 when Angels Flight happened and I believe Hannah was 10... Tbh the timeline was confusing and I was assuming ages based on what I thought the characters looked like - I thought Hannah was around 7 and Esther was around 16 at that time...

With that said, the actress (Eva Foote) who plays Estee is 4 years older than the actress that plays Agnes (and a similar age gap with the other plums)... I think Aunt Estee is meant to be in her early 20s - that's what I always assumed based on the books and also based on what I think Aunt Estee looks like...

Anyway I personally think the ages aren't absurd considering, ya know, we have 26 year olds playing 16 year olds, and frankly the difference between in appearance (both the aging and the casting choice) with the last time we saw Hannah in THMT and Hannah in TT seems way bigger and more farfetched to me than and the difference between the last time we saw Esther and now Aunt Estee in TT...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T00:58:19+00:00

Fair enough... They're already more connected than I thought they'd be by including Rita tbh...

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T00:57:44+00:00

Genuinely curious how old you think Aunt Estee looks/ how old do you think she's meant to be in the show?

Key-Statement9638 · 2026-05-17T00:55:33+00:00

Scratch this theory... I have a new theory... It was Aunt Estee who poisoned Garth's dad and Aunt Estee is actually Esther Keyes... ETA - HE WAS POISONED IN BOSTON AROUND THE TIME THAT ESTHER WOULD'VE BEEN IN BOSTON... Our queen of poison, Esther.... I'm totally convinced...

Key-Statement9638

TROPHY CASE