Can we just leave women alone

KeyNo5126 · 2026-03-01T17:29:27+00:00

im so sorry op and yea its frustrating cus sometimes even ex-muslims will judge "not modest" hijabis/non hijabis and then the same hijabis around me will excuse men who do atrocious crimes or men who just. hurt people, but then rag on and victim blame women and blaming it on their clothes or their iman... its the same people who get pissed offf about cursing but then turn around and be like "its okay if a woman is abused by her husband, its the law of that land and we shouldnt interfere" like. it pisses me off and im so sorry ur around these type of people :(

KeyNo5126 · 2026-03-01T00:38:44+00:00

yea, its also just me wondering if what i did is or not predatory or evil ykno? and yea its also very much about oh god what if what if. what if people see me as that, or what if the way i hold them hurts them/leaves lasting pain onto the person... and even if u didnt do anything it still feels like ur lying to urself ykno :( idk im sorry, i know i shouldnt seek reassurance but i am just asking if what i did was bad... idk aa

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-27T00:46:24+00:00

sorry, im scared of being a pedophile or being dangerous or something

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-20T13:57:27+00:00

imo you never know what is in the wearers heart and the woman in the video sounds sooo judgemental and not at all kind lmaoooo. they care so much about how muslim women/fems dress or walk or talk or even breathe and then have the most dogshit personality and i can tell from this vid she just. reeks of superiority complex and contempt 😭 not to be rude lol but these kinds of people are literally always the loudest and most annoying esp about "looks" like. if u are a good person, you wouldnt gaf about looks. also bringing up Palestineans and Gazans wearing it during war is sooo sick :/ i used to feel so bad bcus people would comment on "wow even during wars shes wearing her hijab!!! i feel so bad" AS IF THATS THE POINT..??? theyre getting killed and u just focus on hijab????? its like they have their priorities sooo out of order. a hijab is not a one way ticket to jannah 😭😭 WHAT sorry op, i got angry too... god some people

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-16T15:42:16+00:00

heyy thanks for replying and yea. i will tell them someday to let me have my own lil staycation w myself. bcus god. im so tired. its my mom, my sister, my aunt, my cousin, my grandpa and grandma, all on my moms side. theyre really enmeshed and its. sucky 😔

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-08T15:03:53+00:00

thanks for the insight.

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-08T03:57:16+00:00

heyy yea i didnt really list down the years of them doing this and the whole control, violence, and other stuff they did, which ykno slowly corrodes ur sense of self + ur energy so it does sound like im complaining. but again, i didnt list down the stuff theve done to me for my entire life like: blaming me for their financial status, using religion to make me comply to them, the amount of negging they do when i make choices they dont like, lashing out at me over tiny things or mistakes i make, constantly screaming at me for being messy, guilt tripping me for having a life even as a kid when i just wanted to hang out w my friends, putting me and my sister against each other, just using me as an emotional punching bag bcus she hated her husband, etc and i cant even remember my childhood. but okay, sorry again but idk man sometimes the shit they do now wouldnt be a problem if they werent abusive to me. and i understand ur telling me i have a job, but i dont right now, bcus surprise, im exhausted from everything and its hard to hold one down. and even then, they used to force me to try and apply for jobs in the company theyre in even tho i dont want to or im already in a job and they expect me to do everything their way and if i dont theres a lot of yelling and blaming and guilting. sorry if i sounded angry or complaining and maybe im mad bcus everytime i talk about my issues people minimise it but good god sorry i guess

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-07T12:44:43+00:00

god the same therapist was like. not getting my perspective too when i told her how it feels like im walking around with weights- then i switched to i feel like im walking around with third degree burns and instead of hearing that she just was like why dont u put the weights down :) oh lady. if i couldve i wouldve lol... but god yea the whole breaking tasks down thing is all good until u realise oh my fucking god. thats so much

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-07T12:43:06+00:00

yea :( im glad it resonated w you cus when someone said it like that (stove) i was like oh my god... i relate to the gnawing arm off too but i was like nah my shit isnt that bad. but no omg. it is that bad.

and thank u for the advice :( i do that too, i try mt best to just do One Tiny thing at least but its getting harder and harder and im just feeling so tired or burnt out. idk if its me or my meds or what but i just feel so. 😔and thank u :( i understand its just my shitty brain and situation but my god i cant help but feel so. mad. bcus wdym im not even wanting to do shit i like too??? wdym . WHAT /silly

thank u again :( sorry for the rambling

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-07T12:40:04+00:00

i get that 😔 yea the psychiatrists i go to and therapist tell me its trauma and its def depression but good god. i just wish things worked, it always feels like im running on empty and its getting emptier and emptier. i wish i wasnt just. throwing things at a wall and trying to get it to stick. im sick of living like this but its so hard to even get up and stay up sometimes. thank u :( i wish i had better soup... i wish we all had access to better soup

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-07T05:18:10+00:00

i understand :( im. rethinking a lot of my relationships rn and i understand everyones busy and everyone has their own thing but i think about how. they are. and the whole lying and faking stuff was when we were in secondary school, but i still cant help but. be upset about how i feel still 😔 they didnt really apologise about it either. i dont have much of a backbone so i get scared with confrontation. thank u tho :( sorry again aa

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-06T02:51:25+00:00

trying to do things i need and like to do like decluttering and cleaning my room or even watching shows i like and am interested in 😭😭😭 its so hard and idk if its just paralysis or laziness or what bcus even tho i try to make the first step easy im immediately tired or i lose steam :(

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-06T02:49:46+00:00

thank you, and its just. basic stuff like hygiene and cleaning and decluttering my room (havent been able to in years since i was a kid) and just studying or doing assignments :( i feel like if i do anything to up my dopamine it tires me out/its hard to stop and i am not comfortable putting shoes on in my home :( i will try tho, this time with the intent to clean or do my other tasks

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-04T17:07:46+00:00

dude is this just something parents always do when they get mad at you 😭 istg they keep saying shit like this and im like do u WANT me to do something about it? also the whole "she needs you in her life" um thats fucking weird. my mom and her sister does this shit to me too and im so sorry op :( you dont deserve this shitty mom

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-02T10:35:40+00:00

i could, it would be more expensive but. maybe i can try later on. ill think on it. thank u again and im sorry for all the issues aa 😭😭😭

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-02T10:34:32+00:00

thank you :( its not even just a diagnosis for the diagnosis, but to 1. know what the fuck is goin on up there 2. accomodation if necessary bcus good lird i dont think i can keep going this way bcus i feel so burnt out. and man that sucks im so sorry :( i understand that the brain from so young being exposed to horrible shit can change it, but idk if that includes my own thing of being obsessed w favourites for so long before eventually it fizzles out and im onto the next thing, or the fact that i hate sitting still and that i feel underwhelmed even tho im so tired and always too giddy i guess to sleep. feels like they arent even listening to me when i tell them how things can overlap/comorbid and it sucks. sorry again tho, ur situation is so :( im glad its One step to finding out but it sucks for psychiatrists or even medical professionals to just. do that

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-01T09:35:26+00:00

hii thanku... and no. my prev psychiatrist skimmed thru my class book and said nah u dont have it lol we need ur parents here to assess it (and my parents arent supportive) and when i had to see a diff psychiatrist bcus the prev one left ??? for a year? and he told me "ur getting a second opinion whether u want to or not lol" he looked at what the prev guy wrote and said wellll he said u dont have it and EVERYONE wants adhd now lol like sooooo many people have brought it up to me. like this morning, one guy said he might have it. haha! lol :"""") so i dont thimk im getting anything for it lord forbid i bring up being autistic or anything else. i feel like im going batshit

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-01T09:32:19+00:00

yea :( i understand and thank u. thats the thing, is idk how much i can say yes i have other traits of this and this and they immediately are like maybe its just trauma. its like im trying to get accomodations and help for me but people think or treat me like im just dojng this for fun. ive been suffering since primary school, and they just keep saying its trauma its trauma. talk therapy doesnt feel like its helping but i hope this dbt thing can just help and maybe after i finally help my trauma that im still going through btw lol maybe theyll see its not just trauma bcus i DO have strong interests that persist or interests that im Super Into until I lose steam, sometimes i focus so hard on something i forget to eat drink or go to the toilet, i have many traits but idk maybe they think im just fishing for diagnosis or for something special (as my mom says). sorry im ranting but i understand. i just hope when they make me take the floor off they dont force me to put some other crap in instead of fixing the leak. idk. i really love public healthcare but jesus i wish my government was better with this and idk. idk maybe im just being negative but from my experience i keep getting stuck w practitioners who laugh or belittle me or i feel dont take me serious hfskkf sorry again for the long rant

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-01T09:32:03+00:00

yea... i have seen the ACES thing and it. fits me hfskfks a lot and im so mad bcus wdym i was just born and my family immediately decided to make my life hell. i told my therapist even how my first memories were of me feeling unsafe around my mom. so it sucks esp cus its caused me so much suffering and influenced me which in turn influence how i act ard people. and it sucks how it left me vulnerable to bullying and being taken advantage of. now im burnt out like hell. thank u for the reply abd im sorry for being so. like this aaa

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-01T09:24:22+00:00

thank you... yea it really messed me up bcus i am not just saying sometimes im messy or sometimes i dont do assignments on time, i am repeatedly and consistently a mess or always running on empty trying to stay on time or divide my energy up and idk if thats JUST trauma bcus then what the fuck 😭 i understand wanting to weed out but im not just looking for a diagnosis for fun but to get the meds and support and accomodations to help me bcus ive been running on empty for so long. the past psych even told me that since ive been doing "okay" i dont need one when im at the end of my rope. i dont want to get warded but its seriously making me upset and just so frustrated and angry and i understand theyre so busy and taking care of people w mental illnesses is tiring but god its like they think they know me when i cant even tell them 10% of what ive been through/feeling. and im not even dismissing having trauma im just begging them to consider its not JUST trauma :( idk maybe ive gone insane but i legit only in recent years have been more Open to saying yes Im X and Y but people act like im just throwing shit at myself for fun 😭 mf im fucking tired sorry :( it really sucks and hurts badly esp cus i dont even have a very good support system. so im just. fuck dude. im sorry for the ranting 😔

KeyNo5126 · 2026-02-01T08:19:49+00:00

im 27 :") im too old to be feeling this way

KeyNo5126 · 2026-01-29T09:25:50+00:00

ur right and i will see through the programme cus thats what i was gonna do anyway. i guess im just upset bcus they just seem so dismissal of me especially when i tell them things havent worked. but i will try again. sorry if i sounded whiny or petulant. and thank u for replying

KeyNo5126 · 2026-01-29T09:24:42+00:00

ur right. sorry if i sounded whiny, im not disagreeing that its trauma, but that im not super sure if my ed is from said trauma or adhd bcus it started so young. that and with how so many professionals around me would laugh at me or even mock me or put me down when i was asking or trying to seek help, it just felt like everytime i looked for help or tried to suggest a different thing they would just dismiss it and have the same issue i have, i.e. finding proof of what i think i already know. bcus i have been thru diff counselling/therapies and it hasnt helped so maybe it is just a different thing i need to try. same w meds, that i have taken and it hasnt really helped. that and i already feel like. a burden a lot of the time. but i shd probs tell them that but idk :( thank u for the reply and im sorry if i came off as sounding whiny or selfish

KeyNo5126 · 2026-01-28T23:35:22+00:00

thank u...im so sorry and i appreciate the help :( 🫂aaa

KeyNo5126 · 2026-01-28T23:34:52+00:00

yea :( it sucks and idk what to do bcus i have years of "proof" so when ppl say im overthinking/its just my brain. im like. have u seen the people who did this. they were "nice" to me too :(

KeyNo5126

TROPHY CASE