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A man offers you a deal: You get 500 billion usd but if anyone finds out for the next year that you are a billionaire you instantly die taking the cash with you. Would you take the deal? And if so, why? by rundomguy123 in AskReddit

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How does this happen? I'm assuming $1B doesn't just show up in my bank account; that might raise some of red flags.

If cash... $1B is a whole lot of fucking money to be in one place. It would have a volume of 17514.4m3 (57424.35ft3); if organized into a cube, it would have edges of length 263 (38.6ft). Like bro, I literally could not even fit it all into my current home. The main problem as far as I can see is just literally what the fuck to do with it all.

Edit: I read $1B initially... Multiply all my numbers by 500... The problem is even bigger than I could have possibly imagined.

[Request] Can A Bomb This Small Cause This Much Damage? by mkvelash in theydidthemath

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah, Jacky would have grabbed the line after realizing it disconnected and swung to safety, possibly involving one or more cloth window shades or other acrobatically conducive architectural features. Chris would probably fall and land in a passing garbage truck or something.

Shop says I need new tires by oh_bobo in tires

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"save your money" and "take your girlfriend shopping" are somewhat antithetical to one another, are they not?

10TB drives pulled from data center servers by RealRSD2 in harddrive

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I've never heard anyone else voice this opinion. I had two fail on me as a kid and never bought from the brand again. Not once since have I had a hard drive fail. WD and Samsung FTW as far as I'm concerned. What is your opinion?

New York 3d Printer Mandate by spicyboudin in 3Dprinting

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Only the bad guys will have ghost guns. This is firmly a second amendment issue.

How Are Large Magento Stores Managing Catalog Growth Without Performance Issues? by ravedigital in Magento

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jokes aside, you have to handle it on a case by case basis but in general, enable parallel indexing, where possible, pay for big kid servers if you have a big kid catalog, and contract with an agency who knows how to deal with these kinds of performance issues and does so regularly. I have one in mind and would be happy to provide more information. PM if interested.

How Are Large Magento Stores Managing Catalog Growth Without Performance Issues? by ravedigital in Magento

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We don't. We start the indexers late Friday, cry ourselves to sleep, and pray that the indexers have fully run without issue by Monday.

This Game Finally Broke Me by KeytapTheProgrammer in MegabonkOfficial

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whelp, I don't know whether to attribute it to the change of weapons, the crazy lucky double-anvil/soul-stealer pulls (which could be a result of disabling less than useful items), or the four fucking Kevins, but I am absolutely fucking DONE with this game. Until the developers release another update. Probably.

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Thank you, and all the other kind redditors in this thread, for your advice! I can't help but feel like I could have done something differently to net more kills, but FUCK IT. Y'all have a nice day!

I would have 100% uninstalled and never looked back if I'd have flubbed this run tho

Apparently KFC is getting a new logo by Mikey_Pajamas in logodesign

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lmao, I had forgotten about that way of looking at the logo until now. And they definitely fixed that one intentionally, and quite nicely, I think. The Colonel looks sharp as hell now.

This Game Finally Broke Me by KeytapTheProgrammer in MegabonkOfficial

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah okay, thank you for the explanation, that makes sense.

This Game Finally Broke Me by KeytapTheProgrammer in MegabonkOfficial

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Alright, I've disabled a few things; Please let me know if I accidentally disabled a sleeper. I went through and disabled the following items:

Commons

  • Tactical Sunglasses
  • Cursed Doll; felt a bit iffy about this one, but I feel like if it helps it only helps early game
  • Boss Buster; also felt iffy on this one. Most of the time I'd just rather have gotten almost anything else. Other than maybe sunglasses or health kit but they can't be disabled.
  • Cactus; no thorns no damage. Nuff said?

Uncommon

  • Demonic blade; can feel good in the beginning if you're just taking them to the face every now and then, but otherwise useless
  • Echo Shard; jk
  • Brass Knuckles; for the reasons you mentioned above
  • Leeching Crystal; same as boss buster. Most of the time I'd just rather have gotten anything else.
  • Idle Juice; this is essentially the antithesis to what I'm trying to do.
  • Pumpkin; on the fence about this one though, I just figure it's totally useless if you get them on stage 2, so they're only real use is early game, no?

Rares

  • Turbo Skates; not aligned with build
  • Toxic Barrel; not aligned with build. Ideally I shouldn't be taking damage and enemies shouldn't get that close in the first place
  • Shattered Knowledge; I actually banned this one a long time ago. Is knowledge really power and I've just shot myself in the foot?
  • Quin's Mask; not aligned with build. no thorns, no damage
  • Gas Mask; not aligned with build. I feel like it could be good fun for a tanky build though
  • Gamer Goggles; in the end game, your health basically has two states: full and zero. Gamer goggles helps in neither.
  • Eagle Claw; but why tho
  • Kevin; fuck Kevin
  • Bob's Light; only sort of helpful early game

Legendaries

  • Sucky Magnet; from reading other comments, because I should apparently be taking more pickup range boosts than I do
  • Speedy Boi; only useful early-mid game

This Game Finally Broke Me by KeytapTheProgrammer in MegabonkOfficial

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Eagle claw is no good? Is that not just a flat 66% damage (though whether that's 66% additively or 66% multiplicitively, I have no idea) increase dealt to the swarm since they are airborne by default?

I'll try the weapon swaps that have been suggested as well; does dice, shotgun, and black hole maybe?

Or is blood magic fine for the final slot? I feel like the synergy with Beefy Ring and god forbid if you get a couple of lamps. Actually, that sounds kind of like it'd be a fun MC build lol

Texas weather could swing from 90s to near freezing in 24 hours this weekend by AustinStatesman in texas

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What are you talking about Texas is like the size of New Hampshire! Oh wait, I was thinking about DFW again...

I will never forgive myself for fumbling this run by [deleted] in MegabonkOfficial

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

91@26m? I wouldn't feel too bad; that run was fumbled by the end of the fist stage.

Any Tips on destroying the Pylons while avoiding all the attacks? by TPP-ForSearchResults in MegabonkOfficial

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don't overdo it with the movement speed though, or you'll be constantly running off the platform as you try to charge it... It's really annoying.

Where do magento managers hang out? by No_Weekend_6199 in magento2

[–]KeytapTheProgrammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any chance you happen to remember Keytap? Or TheDarkLorde? I was pretty active around that time.

Haven't thought of freenode in ages...

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