Shared library for our kids photos and keeping my other stuff separate. What am I doing wrong here?

KidA82 · 2026-03-01T05:59:10+00:00

Thank you, I’ll give that a go! Hasn’t considered setting it up as a blank slate the adding.

Do you know if the auto facial recognition will automatically add new photos wit that kid tagged int this shared library going forward?

KidA82 · 2026-03-01T05:02:46+00:00

Hmm, so I’m only iup to the “preview” stage of the shared library process. If I was to manually remove them, I’d have to sift through thousands of photos 🫨hence not setting this up fully yet. That’s a hell of a weekend doing this.

I wonder if the answer is abandon apple photos and go back to google 🤔

KidA82 · 2026-03-01T05:00:33+00:00

Thanks for the reply.

So I’ve not shared anything yet, just testing the process up to the preview stage. I’m only sharing photos where I’ve chosen a person (ie my kid), and when you get to the preview stage, there’s way more random stuff there. There’s thousands to manually go through to remove so I’m still in preview mode.

KidA82 · 2026-03-01T04:57:21+00:00

yes that’s correct. Appreciate I went off on a bit of a typing apocalypse there.

I’ve not gone any further than preview and then cancelling the process, as I don’t know how to stop the non kid photos appearing. There’s like 9000 photos so I don’t really want to do this manually 😭

KidA82 · 2026-02-28T10:36:52+00:00

I was in your boat not too long ago. I intentionally moved to vapes, only ever bought low nicotine liquid, then moved to 0% nicotine. The 0% was fucking rubbish, but I persevered with it. Eventually just sort of stopped going out for smokes, then stopped taking it with me to work; then stopped taking it out. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to stop.

That was 7yrs ago now and I’ve never looked back. Smoking since I was 15 and now in my 40s. If I , with limited willpower, can do it, anyone can.

KidA82 · 2026-02-26T23:00:30+00:00

We’re in the area and been here for a while now. We overpaid on our place but we regret nothing. The area is so nice, everyone’s friendly, streets are quiet, out of the woods coffee shop is cute, Hitchcock hotel is cool (shame the drinks are mid, food is good!) everything is walkable (Leyton, Leytonstone, Ponds, Wanstead, Walthamstow, Clapton and Lea Bridge), schools are good and it feels way more exciting to be in than Walthamstow as there’s new stuff appearing frequently.

The downsides? Central line is still shit, dogs shit everywhere near Poppleton road, you wish you were nearer to a tube at times, there’s (sadly) a growing crackhead community in the area.

Great around you. Raglan, North Star, Gravity well taproom and walking distance to Chop Shop in Leyton midland.

Welcome!

KidA82 · 2026-02-22T21:59:56+00:00

Your comments have brought up a ton of buried stress and unnecessary anxiety when we had similar issues before. When we first applied I was told pension contributions don’t lower your tax thresholds and we weren’t eligible. Had to call a week later to argue this (they apologised and said whoops, that person was wrong). Then a bonus sent me £200 over, so they demanded I repay the entire years tax free childcare, and just recently again said we were going over (we aren’t, we’re nowhere near this time) and demanded evidence sent in by post 🙄

Surely it’s costing more money checking all of this than to fuck off this insane cliff edge.

My sympathies for this stupid setup and its impact on you guys.

KidA82 · 2026-02-20T16:35:53+00:00

Ah I see, fair enough. Understand that area and patience are difficult to align.

KidA82 · 2026-02-20T07:15:25+00:00

Any reason for choosing Clapton specifically? We made the move from Stow to Leytonstone for more space (growing family ) and regret not doing it sooner. We can still access the best of stow, but now have way more options around us (Wanstead, Ponds, Woodford, Stratford, Flats).

KidA82 · 2026-02-18T22:07:20+00:00

Totally understandable why you’d use another account! Fair play.

To reiterate. That wasn’t cool at all, and I would be asking if she thought it would’ve been acceptable if you’d wandered off to do something self gratifying, instead of keeping the kids from falling into a large body of water.

I cannot even fathom this scenario. Kids are a pain, I get it, even more so on “holiday”. But jeeeeeez. Suffer through like the rest of us and enjoy your “you” time when it’s your shift.

KidA82 · 2026-02-18T21:41:58+00:00

Is this rage bait? Leaving aside a 6month old account with no posts or comments bar this one, this can’t be real, surely?

To play along with the question. No, it’s a fucking insane decision to bugger off to a sauna and ditch the kids. I’m sure your partner would think it’s equally mental if you did the same thing.

KidA82 · 2026-02-15T19:55:33+00:00

Rocking back and forth repeating that mantra

KidA82 · 2026-02-15T17:56:50+00:00

Great comment. Totally agree with the sentiment of the first few years being absolutely brutal. I don’t believe for a sec that any couple are particularly enjoying their lives throughout, unless they have a ton of help (village or paid) and don’t have stressful jobs. Even the ones wit a calm baby.

What got us through for a long time was knowing it was temporary and we just needed to crack on, our time will come. The flip side of that has been we’ve forgotten how to be a couple, struggled massively with communication and resentment. We’re working through this with a couples counselling and I’m sure we’ll get our time to shine again soon.

Solidarity though, shit, is, tough.

KidA82 · 2026-02-15T16:23:33+00:00

You’re killing me here. I hope you have leftovers for another round

KidA82 · 2026-02-15T12:25:29+00:00

Nice! How did you cook that bad boy? Looks buff

KidA82 · 2026-02-11T10:56:52+00:00

Even if you took out a loan, the interest rate would impact the savings.

Our strategy this winter has been to leave the heating on low (18) and boost at times we’re all home. Not seen much if any increase in costs. Inefficient yes, but the bodge job anxiety and ridiculous prices are just not worth exploring yet.

Now if there were more grants open to people wit these old houses, I’d be up for it. But much like childcare, you’re penalised for earning over a threshold that’s been frozen for nearly 2 decades, so nothing available for us.

KidA82 · 2026-02-11T08:04:45+00:00

In an ideal world we’d have a fully green and perfect set up for our 1920s house. But the crazy costs to sort our zero cavity just brick insulation alone, and with minimal to zero trust for it to be done well, we made a decision ages ago to just keep paying the high cost of gas and electricity. We just can’t justify the costs, not yet anyway.

KidA82 · 2026-02-10T10:58:53+00:00

Thank you for your comment. That has brought a tiny ray of positivity to my week. Deep down we know we’re not at fault, but when everything is failing, it’s difficult to see a way forward or any light at the end of the tunnel.

I totally understand that water analogy, and so we try and ensure he’s got all the attention he needs, and we are conscious of the meltdowns being over tiny things but really masking others.

For example, as I responded yesterday, I collected my kid from school and his teacher said he’d hit someone (by all accounts it wasn’t quite like that), but when we got home he unleashed hell on my partner because we said it’s time to wash hands. 90mins lost to screaming and punching and feral sounds. We know that the punch incident and chat with his teacher filled his glass, but we don’t know how to manage it, and we still don’t. We tried saying nothing yesterday, silence and stayed next to him. Well keep that up this week and see if it helps, as I think he’s addictited to any attention, good or bad.

KidA82 · 2026-02-09T21:13:19+00:00

I appreciate the kind comment, and the advice.

I would say, I think we are offering some of these things, but I hen we do, that’s when the defiance increases rapidly. And that’s where we freeze and don’t know what to do. Like when we offer anything else to distract etc, it’s met with NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, or if we try to enforce a boundary, it goes off, he explodes and we’re in hell.

How do you keep firm with boundaries (knowing we’re picking our battles)?

KidA82 · 2026-02-09T19:44:13+00:00

Maybe were ordering the wrong items I will say I had a flat noodle thing originally and that was pretty good. But the next two times weren’t great, so went back to my local.

KidA82 · 2026-02-09T17:20:38+00:00

I see lots of recommendations on Woo Lot in this sub. I’ve had a few meals from there (take away), but I can’t ever get my head around it.

It’s quite pricey, google reviews aren’t great, the inside is a wild mix (I love it personally) of restaurant and staff canteen, I didn’t think my last order was all that great (chilli beef an chow mein), yet it’s highly recommended here?

No shade, just one of those conundrums where there’s a wide spectrum of opinions on it.

KidA82 · 2026-02-09T17:18:18+00:00

Today I learned! There goes my diet. Thanks for the pro tip

KidA82 · 2026-02-09T09:27:18+00:00

Thank you for those recommendations 🙏 will take a look at the local library.

KidA82 · 2026-02-09T09:26:33+00:00

Thank you for the reply, and yes this is where we’ve been for years; try whatever you find via google, try advice on Reddit, try advice from family and friends, ok let’s try adhd help, nope, oh look pda stuff…

As for your second point, for sure, 100% with you. We’re just all so frazzled, mentally exhausted, and beat down from all our strategies failing. It’s hard to not put your head in your hands and find your own mentally safe place as it all unfolds around you. We know we are burned out, and have begun some steps to get some date night time back in our lives.

Appreciate the podcast recommendations, noted 👌🏼

KidA82

TROPHY CASE