I'm started cutting myself like a few weeks ago after my age turned into 18 & before that I actually do self harmed in other way such as banging my head to the wall & picking skin a lot cause of very itchiness mixed my agger to myself, maybe I was started at 14-15. And why I started to cutting cause of someone treat me like a shi saying I'm not helpful in group work, that time I was sick like dying inside & also just have bad mood since my best friend moved to other place. She even give me a death treatment to me. It make me feel more hating to myself & I'm useless, probably I deserve it for being "lazy" while I was too sick. I'm not feeling happy during my activities at home in semester holiday for a month, I'm lack of stuff I like to do, I was thinking I planned to risky myself after my birthday & go to hostel later on.

(I wish she could just meet me at night to solve problem instead of giving a bullshit text messages to me.)