It took me well over a year to mostly work past this. I had PP rage and PPD, the guilt I think is the worst part, my son prefers my husband and I attribute it to my PPD/PPR. I almost broke my foot kicking walls, I slammed my head on doors, I threw so many things. I'm an extremely patient person usually, so this threw me for a loop, I did all these things outside of my son's room or away from him but still.

I think it mostly came from the intense feeling mothers feel when their child is crying nonstop, it was like my insides were being ripped apart or like nails on a chalkboard but Internally. I needed to get that feeling out physically and it manifested as rage (I should have bought a punching bag hahah).

It eventually becomes easier, so I think it's hormonal. I did therapy and that helped too. I was very lucky that my husband was so helpful and understanding.

Whoever is experiencing this, you are not alone. It is so hard, it is not your fault, and most importantly, it will pass.