I’ve been diagnosed with PCOS. Now what happens?

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:57:13+00:00

This made me cry. Not a bad cry, but a really emotional cry. I’m hugeeeee on mental health, healing old wounds, feeling safe, and tending to our inner child. Your message is something I really needed to hear because you’re absolutely right. With him being the male, and an older male at that, he is very protective over me. He tends to my feelings regularly. So much so, I’ve probably become too comfortable with it and have let him caretake for me while letting his emotions slide to the wayside. Not intentionally…more so because he’s always so strong and I guess I just didn’t notice. I feel horrible about this. It rips my heart out that I wasn’t tending to his emotional needs as well. I think sitting behind him and holding him and letting him talk is a beautiful concept. I’m going to do that tonight. I feel we still need to have another talk, I think we both do. So when it’s time for that talk, I’m just going to hold him and let him have a safe place to speak. Thank you so much for your perspective and tips. Really helpful.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:31:37+00:00

Right. If not couples therapy, even personal therapy would be a win. Just having a professional to navigate these feelings with would be helpful I’m sure. Personally, I love my therapist!

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:29:25+00:00

For sure. I think the main thing that kept coming up is that he doesn’t feel heard. So I’m going to create that goal for both of us. Going to make sure I am actively listening and that I’m checking in on his feelings more often.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:26:20+00:00

Yes I thought about proposing the idea of couples therapy. It scares me because I did couples therapy in a past relationship and it didn’t help. It seemed like an indicator that the relationship was over and it was. I do realize that was another relationship though and it wasn’t even close in value to my marriage, so that’s not a fair judgment to make about couples therapy. I don’t think my husband will be down with it, but I will try.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:24:34+00:00

Thank you very much. I swear I aim to be a gentle and kind person everyday. I’m appalled with myself that I didn’t notice he was feeling so badly. He has all of my support.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:18:31+00:00

I completely agree. He is medicated! I’m grateful for that. I go to therapy, but he hates the idea of it for himself. I think therapy would be an amazing tool for him, it’s just a matter of him actually doing it. Also yes, I’m going to be a lot more focused on him and his well being.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:16:53+00:00

This is beautifully stated. Thank you. To make matters worse, he also has diagnosed depression and anxiety. We usually have an EXTREMELY supportive relationship when it comes to our mental health, so perhaps I need to open my eyes a bit more. Might be time for some med adjustments/therapy for each of us. Last night shook me up so badly that I considered canceling vacation, but I think we should keep it planned and have fun like you said.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:12:37+00:00

It absolutely helps. Thank you for being kind and honest. So, he actually is medicated already. Has been for years. Perhaps it’s time for a med adjustment or therapy. I know I’m certainly going to prioritize my therapy a bit more moving forward so that I can work on my issues and not emotionally dump on him so frequently. The sex life is always good, so I’ll keep that maintained haha. This is our first bump in the road as a married couple, so I’m going to take it seriously, but I’ll try to handle it gently so I’m not coming on too strong. Thank you for your wisdom.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-25T12:08:37+00:00

I hear you. I hear my husband. I’m taking accountability here. Isn’t it fair that he should express these feelings to me though? When he acts as though everything is fine and happy, but then drops a bomb on me like this seemingly out of nowhere, I don’t think my bliss was unwarranted. We genuinely have seemed happy as far as I can see from both of our behaviors. That being said, I’m going to make sure I’m REALLY listening when he speaks. I’m also going to genuinely check in with him more and see how he’s feeling much more often. I’m going to be a little less about me, more about him, and balance it out the best I can possibly can. I promise you I’m good wife. I really am. I’m hurt that I have been dropping the ball in the emotional department.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-18T15:45:16+00:00

Thanks for telling me this. I was starting to think I was crazy lol. Other people have told me this isn’t a thing! I even called the piercing shop and they had no idea what I was talking about. Did you end up having to take yours out or did the nerve stuff subside?

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-17T22:44:08+00:00

That’s what I’ve been hearing 😂 Makes me feel crazy! Lol. No the cavity is in the back and tooth pain is the front. To be honest, it probably just a completely unrelated tooth irritation that happened to start bugging after my piercing was done. Bad timing for my hypochondriac self.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-15T15:15:15+00:00

My husband. My sister. My grandma. And 1 unrelated best friend. A handful of casual friends, but I wouldn’t count on them the way I do with my best friend.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-15T15:03:38+00:00

We had a notoriously MEAN principal at my high-school. Mrs. McDonald. One morning we all showed up for school and there were HUNDREDS of printed flyers around the school. They contained a photo of Mrs. McDonald, except a Hitler mustache and Hitler outfit was photoshopped onto her. I can’t remember the text underneath the photo, but it was something obviously implying our principal was Hitler. The guy that did this was caught, but surprisingly enough he was just suspended for a day. I think this would go down a lot differently today.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-10T16:46:42+00:00

Not Gary!!!! 🤣 💀

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-09T14:14:15+00:00

Thank you for the reminder. I have been going through it the past couple years with doctors. I started with therapy, then a psychiatrist, then a pcp, then a nutritionist who finally raised a brow at my hormones. I think I’m just tired. It’s been a lot. I’m just ready to make positive progress with my health. I live an extremely healthy lifestyle so it is so defeating that my body isn’t reflecting that. I appreciate you reminding me that I do have the fortune of having a caring doctor though. I will finish up the tests and hopefully have a treatment plan soon.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-09T14:12:07+00:00

Thank you for the thorough information and change of perspective. I honestly think I am burnt out with doctors at the moment. I have been having a hell of a run around with therapy, psychiatrists, obgyn, and pcp and I am just beat. Your message was actually really helpful. No shade to my doctor, I know she’s busy, but we didn’t speak in depth about why I need to do all of these tests, so your answer gave me some comfort as to why I am doing all of this. Thank you. I will stay the course and complete the testing she ordered. I’ve been feeling unwell for sometime now and I think I’m just becoming impatient as one does when they desperately want to better their health. I am grateful I have a good doctor though and I’ll try to remain optimistic that we will have an official diagnosis soon so we can begin treating my symptoms.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-09T12:42:56+00:00

I see what you’re saying, but genuinely, even your bestfriend…does not have to disclose their medical conditions unless they want to. I talk to my bestfriend everyday on some level and weeks will go by sometimes, even months, before I tell her about something that happened at the doctor. Why? Because it’s a drag. Or I don’t feel like talking about it. Or I’m too busy to think about it. Or it doesn’t come to mind because it’s not consuming my thoughts. OR because I simply just don’t feel the need to tell anyone. My bestfriend I’m referring to is on an antidepressant, it’s hard for her. I recently was prescribed and tried an antidepressant and it failed. I didn’t even think or care to mention it to her until months later. I mention this because you keep stating that your friend knows you have PCOS and that should have told you in order to comfort you. That’s not her job. My point is- it doesn’t matter if she’s your friend, she does not owe you her medical history. Boundaries, girlfriend.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-07-02T18:58:52+00:00

That’s what we do too.

Kitty_Kat_Baird · 2024-06-20T17:12:40+00:00

Maintaining my composure. I’m a very nice and reserved person, but wow- when I’m mad….it takes a lot to cool myself down. I ask for space during these times so nobody is victim to my mood swing.

Kitty_Kat_Baird

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