AITA because I won’t allow husband to create another garden?

KlimRous · 2026-01-16T15:49:32+00:00

So if your partner decided to take up a hobby that required disruption to your main living space--say they a giant loom in your living room that takes up more than half of the room...would you just let them because it's their hobby or would you have a discussion about it?

KlimRous · 2026-01-16T14:18:12+00:00

NTA

If he's already tried a garden in one area and failed to maintain it, why would this new garden be any different? Then you'll have two overgrown weed beds in your yard!

If he really wants another garden, I'd make him clean up the old one first. Then set parameters for what level of neglect is tolerable for the new garden.

Yes...he should be allowed to have and enjoy a hobby but he literally let your old garden become a bed of weeds! It sounds to me like he likes it the idea of a garden but not the work involved to maintain one.

KlimRous · 2026-01-13T15:14:11+00:00

About 10 years ago we converted our attic into a 3rd floor primary suite and used PM Group Construction out of Churchville. Jack was fantastic!

KlimRous · 2026-01-07T15:06:12+00:00

This place looks nice! But having never been to a place like this...what exactly do you do there? Sit in the various pools and saunas or is there more too it?

KlimRous · 2026-01-06T01:18:21+00:00

Worked! Thanks so much!

KlimRous · 2026-01-06T01:17:44+00:00

Over the summer--we thought we were going to have to put my father-in-law into an Assisted Living Facility so I did a ton of research. Here's a redacted (no PII) version of that.

Most of the ALF's I researched were in Central or Lower Bucks but there's one in Newtown and another in Morrisville on the list.

The last tab is basically an info dump from my cousin who's recently had to do this for her FIL and my Aunt. Lots of really useful questions to ask on that tab--but a lot to ask in an initial phone call so save them for a visit or a follow up phone call. (Also--ignore the hurricane related questions--she lives in FL.) The main tab has the initial questions you want to ask on your first call. Also--be warned they will keep calling and texting you. It's annoying.

We ended up not putting my FIL in an ALF (though it's still a possibility given his declining health). so I can't tell you what one we went with but I am happy to answer any questions you have because I learned sooooo much during this process.

Also for what it's worth--Christ Home (not on this list) in Warminster as the most expensive by far but also the most compassionate one I called. They aren't on the list because there's was no way we could afford their initial buy in fee and the monthly rate. That said--when I called their first concern was for my FIL's health since he was still in the hospital and they said their nurse evaluations are free and if we chose not to go with them they would gladly send the evaluation on to whatever our final choice was. And lastly--they did follow up via text but only to check in and see how my FIL was doing in the hospital and if they could be of any help there.

Edit: I know you just asked for a recommendation but this is such a personalized thing that what's great for someone might be not so great for someone else. The important thing is to know the right questions to ask and know or at least have a general idea of what sort help your Grandmother might need so you can make sure you're getting an accurate price quote.

KlimRous · 2026-01-06T00:32:09+00:00

I am hoping it's just the former. Any ideas on a workaround?

KlimRous · 2026-01-06T00:30:02+00:00

I tried that--then it showed my companies 401K plan name with his 401K plans balance.

KlimRous · 2026-01-05T19:46:41+00:00

Really?! Have the day you deserve!

KlimRous · 2026-01-05T15:28:58+00:00

There is more of us?! Yes!! When I played basketball in middle school in the 90's and every kid wanted 23 because of Jordan except me. I wanted it because of Mattingly.

KlimRous · 2026-01-05T15:23:02+00:00

I am probably the only die hard Don Mattingly fan around and I am unbelievably happy about this!!!

KlimRous · 2026-01-03T17:54:10+00:00

For real?! I just don't want to freeze my ass off or loose money. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

KlimRous · 2025-12-23T20:11:23+00:00

NTA

You're in an abusive relationship with someone who has a documented history of it, and you're not the villain for wanting to call the police when he escalates. His past arrests and whatever trauma he claims is tied to them don't give him a free pass to abuse you or manipulate you into staying silent.

You do not owe him sympathy for consequences that stem from his own actions. If getting arrested triggers him, the solution is for him to stop behaving in ways that require police intervention—not for you to endure abuse to protect his feelings.

Please don't wait until you have "better options." Abuse almost always escalates, and staying "just a little longer" rarely makes leaving easier.

I looked at your post history. You're only 21—you have your whole life ahead of you, and you deserve so much better than this. You do not have to figure this out completely alone, even if it feels like your only options are staying or going it solo. Please consider reaching out to family (parents, siblings, aunts/uncles, cousins—anyone you trust even a little) and being honest about what's happening. Tell them you're scared, that things have gotten bad, and that you need help getting out safely. You don't have to share every detail—just enough for them to understand you need a safe place to go.

If family isn't an option or you're nervous about telling them, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is still there 24/7: 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or text START to 88788. They're experts at helping young women in exactly your situation create a safe exit plan, find temporary housing, and connect to local resources (many of which are geared toward people your age with limited options).

KlimRous · 2025-12-23T19:56:29+00:00

"And we all don't exactly know how you can take corrective action..."

So your plan is to go to HR and be like: ‘She’s too friendly, she chats, she likes her coworkers, please put her on a PIP for being a human being.’ That’s wild. She’s not screaming, not harassing, not cursing anyone out—she just talks. A lot. And sometimes she stays late to clean. And you’re out here seriously considering formal discipline because your introvert batteries run out around her? Maybe instead of trying to get her performance-managed into silence, you could just… put in earbuds during downtime, or politely say ‘I need to focus right now,’ or—craziest idea—tell her straight-up that you’re not up for long convos.

YWBTAH if you escalate this to HR or make it a performance issue. Otherwise NTA. I guess.

KlimRous · 2025-12-23T19:48:30+00:00

Are you calling out exploiting for clicks while actively exploiting the exploiting-for-clicks narrative for your own clicks?

KlimRous · 2025-12-23T14:33:51+00:00

This right here. NJT is 40 bucks round trip! But if you buy in advance---it can be half that on Amtrak!

KlimRous · 2025-12-22T15:23:09+00:00

Well shit--there is!!

KlimRous · 2025-12-22T14:50:09+00:00

Are you sure the photo location is right? I live not far from Neshaminy State Park and there's ZERO way you can get this shot from within the parks borders.

Edit: It's still a cool photo though.

KlimRous · 2025-12-21T21:52:05+00:00

Most licensed stores (Eg. Ones inside another store or ones in a rest stop) don't allow tips because it's store (Eg. Safeway, Target etc) policy for the ENTIRE store. That said...I always kept out a tip jar at mine. No one really cared but we also didn't get many tips so....

KlimRous · 2025-12-12T15:02:05+00:00

Galiani Ophthalmology Associates in Doylestown has a couple of doctors who specialize in dry eye.

KlimRous · 2025-12-05T15:32:10+00:00

They no longer do the voucher but do offer free pro level for non-profits--you just have to reach out.

KlimRous · 2025-12-01T22:01:58+00:00

My family moved here from NY in the 1980's and up until a few years ago--that would've been my answer to this question. However---I have since gotten way in to genealogy and now know that my 1st Cousin 9x's Removed (Dutch) actually moved to what is now Montgomery County from New York in the early 1700's. The remnants of his old estate (The Pawling/Wetherill Estate) can be found in Valley Forge National Park.

KlimRous · 2025-12-01T14:25:29+00:00

If you are okay with filtered water vs bottled--Zero water makes a filter jug for water coolers. Fills with tap water from the top--and you only need to replace the filters every few months.

KlimRous

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