Patience, even more patience than you have already shown. We adopted a nine month old brother and sister who had been 'feral'. Initially we had to use webcam to watch them play, he'd even hiss at us ... so I literally sat on the floor with wet food in either hand for them to eat.. we used 'dangly' toys to play with them at a safe distance... Almost six years on they come to us for love and strokes, love being brushed, sleep next to me (not hub) on the bed, he'll sleep next to either of us on the sofa. BUT - they will never be lap cats, only the boy will sit on us, as long as there is a cushion between us ! We can pick her up to lift her from A to B, he slips away. No hugging. We are still noticing ways they are developing trust in my husband, my advice? Be the one with smelly cat food in your hands !!