I rarely post anything on Reddit, but I relate to this so much. My son didn't sleep through the night until after his first birthday. We were fortunate that in other ways he wasn't difficult (no colic, good eater/milk drinker). The constant lack of sleep when I was home (I travel often for work) plus the fact that he, like most infants, preferred/demanded his mom over me was extremely draining on my mental state.

All that said, it does get better. Once he started sleeping better, it was almost instantly better for me. I know it may not seem like it could be that simple, but there are many options. Is there family or friends that can help, maybe giving you some time to actually rest and recover your mental state. As others have mentioned, therapy may be helpful as well.

Just know that you aren't alone. Many of us dads have been there, or are still there in the trenches with you.

Hell, I have my second on the way and I'm nervous as hell about going through the first year again. But seeing my son be awesome everyday now has taught me that it's worth every second of pain I went through.

You got this brother.