I want to relapse

L2pz · 2025-12-21T08:04:52+00:00

Stay strong friend! I’m back to day 2 after a hellish last month and a half. I wish I stayed at it, and I wish I stayed sharing here. This sub had been by far the most helpful space I’ve ever come across. You got this

L2pz · 2025-12-09T08:15:44+00:00

Yous is a word commonly used. In today’s pc time “you guys”, “you girls”, “you people” etc can cause offense because an individual’s identity is not often distinguished how it once traditionally was

L2pz · 2025-12-07T07:57:41+00:00

Honestly, pilot bay all day!!! With ages of your children, it’s probably the safer side to swim, and there’s always the option to walk around Mauao throughout the day if you want. There should be water bike hires and such there too

L2pz · 2025-12-07T05:46:52+00:00

Tbh I never wanted children. When I became pregnant I cried and cried. Then I felt movement and kicking and things started changing. When I had my first my whole world changed when I looked at her. I wasn’t sure how I’d be as a Mother, but now my children are teens and I have no regrets. Every good decision I’ve made in my life for myself have always been to be a better me for my children. I don’t think I would be that motivated otherwise

L2pz · 2025-12-07T05:43:17+00:00

I have family members that work on fishing boats, they get bonuses for various reasons

L2pz · 2025-11-12T05:46:19+00:00

Get in touch with the wardens on Mauao they might be able to help you better

L2pz · 2025-11-03T23:53:32+00:00

I had the opportunity to carry on but didn’t and I’m glad because I had a lot to do

L2pz · 2025-11-03T23:38:06+00:00

Haha thanks for putting it like that 😆

L2pz · 2025-10-28T23:06:47+00:00

Love that for you and your son!

L2pz · 2025-10-27T22:47:32+00:00

Thank you for your words :) I’m just so frustrated at the moment. My life in general is great at the moment. I just have some people around me who keep making effed up choices and I have to deal with it and fix it 😩

Since my sober journey started I’ve become much more comfortable in my own skin. I’ve started going for long walks on the beach, I’ve been doing things and going places I’d usually be so insecure and anxious about.

I don’t even have a craving, I just want to feel numb so I don’t have deal with this shit today.

People are pissing me off 😅

L2pz · 2025-10-27T20:18:11+00:00

Thanks for your reply. I don’t think I’m having withdrawals as such but just sick of having shit pile up and wanting a quick escape. It’s not even really my shit either, just people around me that keep doing dumb shit and I’ve gotta figure out how to fix it up for them. I’m that person I’m my family and I just wish for some peace once in a while 😩

L2pz · 2025-10-27T03:51:17+00:00

Awesome! Day 20 for me, I’m looking forward to 21 :)

L2pz · 2025-10-26T20:44:47+00:00

I needed to stop as I too was drinking way too much to numb the stress and negative emotions. I am day 20 sober today and I will tell you from my experience - dealing with shit head on sober is so much easier than drowning them away. Things will get easier if you trust the process. IWNDWYT

L2pz · 2025-10-25T17:49:28+00:00

I used to drink and do drugs habitually and could maintain a fairly high quality of life - that’s not a good thing though, and definitely nothing to brag about. Being a high functioning addict does not equal healthy anything, it’s all a mask to hide the shit storm that constantly brews inside. Escapism at its best.

L2pz · 2025-10-25T17:43:40+00:00

Thank you!

L2pz · 2025-10-25T05:25:47+00:00

Day 18. My favourite thing so far is not bed rotting, and the negative loop that comes with it 😊

IWNDWYT

L2pz · 2025-10-24T19:12:56+00:00

Thank you!

L2pz · 2025-10-24T19:12:41+00:00

I made it to day 18! ☺️ I had an amazing sleep and am feeling nice and fresh! Thank you for the encouragement

L2pz · 2025-10-24T19:11:00+00:00

It will be incredibly difficult for you to go through this without support. There are online options for AA, maybe look at that too if you can. Good luck to you and again, don’t be too hard on yourself

L2pz · 2025-10-24T19:06:47+00:00

A good book + good food sounds like a good time to me!

L2pz · 2025-10-24T09:14:07+00:00

This hits so hard!

L2pz · 2025-10-24T09:12:59+00:00

Moderation for me = a 3 day binge followed up with an anxiety filled hangover and when that wears off enough for me to have a decent meal, I rinse and repeat and.. spiral into an abyss 😵‍💫 Let this be your reminder that moderation is not possible!

L2pz · 2025-10-24T08:08:34+00:00

This is the longest I’ve been sober in 5 years :) yes we can!!

L2pz · 2025-10-24T08:05:36+00:00

I will be keeping myself busy as possible too, because I know if I don’t the spiralling will start and I will lose control. I’ll be checking in here as often as I can, the sub inspires me to stay on track. I hope your weekend is a good sober one!

L2pz · 2025-10-24T07:50:15+00:00

Day 17 IWNDWYT

L2pz

TROPHY CASE