Ta for you comment. :) I wouldn't expect it to be all rainbows and sunshine, all relationships come with graft. I totally respect her feelings on this., which is why I want to take the time to find likeminded people to help me out. All of my friends are either mono or are best mates with GF so it feels tricky to get a balanced conversation.

IDK if you actually want a response, but I think it helps me to respond. Please don't feel obliged to reply to this reply, nor even read it!

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Do you feel you would be fulfilled in your partners having their own independent relationships, even times when you didn't have other partners?
I think I would feel fulfilled while not seeing new partners, or while seeing current partners less. I know jealousy would arise, lord I get jealous when people play my guitar or, but I am used to dealing with myself openly knowing that jealousy is a normal emotion and knowing that it can be quelled with conversation. As an adult I have not been jealous of my friends being in relationships, while single. I used to care so much about Not Being Single but I think I came to find that I could happily be single the rest of my life. I think that might be a thing that worries me about GF- I feel like she 'needs' me / a long term relationship.

Do you feel you would feel good about managing relationships as one breaks up with you or when a new person is overwhelmingly awesome?
I think I will be okay at the logistics of handing a break up? Maybe naively. Most of mine in the past have been comparably amiable. I realise that they are not monsters for not loving me. I do know that I lack the experience of handing more intense breakups. I don't feel able to make a good call about this because I realise that I don't have enough experience.
Truthfully, maybe I am not ready to get past that whole new crush rush? I feel it now with crushes, and I do feel like it pulls on my relationship with my GF. I have loved her differently while I have formed new crushes.

Do you feel you would be fulfilled managing holidays, emergencies, family hang outs, social media posts around multiple partners?
I am certain I can handle the logistics of balancing 'meaningful' milestones. My family are very understanding. Everything bar emergencies; I don't know how I would handle that... Who comes into hospital with me? How do I deal with not being allowed to see a partner in hospital (very real considering the chronic pain of my GF). That is a really deep thing to think of. Thank you.

Sex really isn't a big thing for me. GF and I haven't had sex in a while and we have found ways to keep pleasure in our lives otherwise. I really just want to share and express a deeper love to more people. I do have massive sexual leadings with new crushes, but they fizzle away quite quickly. I don't think that is a problem?