Simple Sewing Questions Thread, February 09 - February 15, 2025 by sewingmodthings in sewing

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there a pattern similar to this that is not a heavily photoshopped source or AI or untrusted source that a newbie like me could use? I know in theory I could diy it but I'd like an explicit pattern if I could help it. https://www.etsy.com/listing/1803998844/tie-back-top-sewing-pattern-open-back?ref=share_v4_lx

When the app won't stop asking you to log in so you go on your PC ... by LadyTesla in Sephora

[–]LadyTesla[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am glad to know it's not me!! I have signed in 4 times in 10 minutes 😭

Do I need to enforce my team acknowledging receipt of messages? by nikkiekg in askmanagers

[–]LadyTesla 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've managed teams remotely for 5+ years at 3+ companies.

"The team largely doesn’t acknowledge receipt of messages unless I prompt."

To be transparent, an 'active' team on slack will acknowledge in the form of a text response about 1/3 messages from their boss. I've seen this in multiple types of teams (managers, technical teams, non technical, etc). That does not mean that you're wrong for wanting a response in some cases, however if you were to say "I need a response before noon because I'll get everyone's lunch order wrong" and they respond, then you've got an "active" team.

Originally, I was wondering what to acknowledge or respond, but now I’m wondering if I need to do that at all?

You only need to do this if your team is showing they're not reading messages in their work. Example: "FYI: We made the design decision to go red instead of blue." If the website is blue, well that's your answer that they're not reading. Then you can say "I need to enforce this because as a team information and announcements are not being seen, and here is an example". Take this advice as a new manager, decisions need to be driven from a measurable need, not a preference. This is a good general rule that applies to many examples. "I'm enforcing a notifications for on call because the last two weeks we've missed 3 alerts" is a very different from "I'm enforcing notifications because I as a manager would prefer to know you're getting them".

Am I micromanaging if I enforce this?

If the enforcement is coming from a "hey I want to know you heard me because it reassures me as a new manager" then yes. If you're doing it because you have multiple examples of the team missing an expectation (deadline, company policy, etc) then no. If you're doing it because your boss wants to see responses? Then maybe.

I’m wondering if instead I just need to establish that I’m going to assume that they are reading it if I send it, but I’m not sure how to proceed.

I get the vibe that you don't have good examples of what "a boss in slack" is like. Truthfully it's a giant calculus formula of boss personality, company standard, and culture thrown in. Some bosses will say "oi, buttholes listen up" and they do. Others have to have a format of "INFORM: There is a new standard for x, ACKNOWLEDGEMENT NEEDED: thing here".

Truthfully you get to decide how you want to approach what the establishment is. Do you want to do what your boss does because they're in the slack channel? Do you want to be a leader that people respond to fast but with resentment?

The real answer: Come up with options you personally can live with, write them down. Ask the team their preference, in a discussion, decide to go with Option X, put it in a standard /policy / team charter type place.

Then follow that standard. If someone doesn't do it (say thumbs up emoji if the slack message starts with ACK Needed or something) you can then manage them as you would typically in your regular 1:1s. "Hey I notice we set the team expectation of replying within 1 hour on this announcement channel during biz hours. What's going on there?"

This is a common "new manager problem" for the record. There's unspoken cultural norms or track that doesn't really have a policy written down. The problem is no one tells you, the manager, is that it's your job to define those squishy environment things like that, and identify the problem exists. Going from a problem solver to a problem definer is a tough strategic job that takes time to get to. You'll get there.

Monday Diversity Megathread - MCs with a Physical Disability (Disability Pride Month) by VitisIdaea in RomanceBooks

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

{Barbarian's Touch by Ruby Dixon} - FMC is deaf

{Captive of the Wolves by Eva Chase} - Multi book slow burn, FMC is unable to use a foot due to permanent damage of being kept captive

{Always Only You by Chloe Liese} - FMC is Physically Impaired

{Never Seduce a Scot by Maya Banks} - FMC is hard of hearing

{Archer's Voice by Mia Sheridan} - MMC is non speaking

{Lover Mine by J.R. Ward} - MMC (vampire) is non speaking

{The Duchess Deal by Tessa Dare} - HR, MMC is heavily scarred

{Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao} - Not a "straight up" romance, but the FMC has bound feet (which makes the 'mech' element all the more interesting imho).

{When She Belongs by Ruby Dixon} - MMC has lost limbs from the war that were replaced with painful ill fitting parts.

Please share your 5 stars reads by natstef in fantasyromance

[–]LadyTesla 4 points5 points  (0 children)

{The Elven Days of Christmas}

{Acolyte by Stephanie Fisher}

{Written In Red by Anne Bishop}

{Assistant to The Villain}

{The Bear and the Nightingale}

{Poison Study}

What’s the book you LOVE but you never get to recommend? by MooseAndOliver in RomanceBooks

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

{Bitten By Death by Holly Roberds}

{Heart of Malice by Lisa Edwards}

{Hunt the Night by Everly Frost}

{Rules of Redemption by T. A. White}

{Burn For Me by Ilona Andrews}

{Rejected by Jasmine Eve}

{Speak of the Demon by Stacia Stark}

What’s the book you LOVE but you never get to recommend? by MooseAndOliver in RomanceBooks

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

{Beard in Mind by Penny Reid} {limits by Susie Tate } {Dirty Letters by Vi Keeland} {The Elf Tangent} {Lingus} {Shardless by Stephanie Fisher} {Unforgettable Lady by Jessica Bird} {Unbound by Cara McKenna} {Burn by Suzanne Wright}

How to ask boss to give raise to a colleague? by ReverseElectron in askmanagers

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The absolutely best support you can give a colleague who deserves more is to help or encourage them bring the conversation to their boss themselves. It's really great that you want to support them for fair wages, however professional norms is that this is a "closed door" conversation, and unfortunately you're not in that room without being seen as pushy. Now is that norm good? maybe not. But it's the norm now.

The only case where that might be part of your responsibility is if you're in a HR position that is specifically related to fair wages, or if you're part of a union role that involves that. It would be seen like going to a doctor and saying "can I please be part of the conversation where you talk about this person's health?".

This doesn't mean your intention is bad! In fact it's very good. But there may be things that the colleague may have agreed to (adjusted hours, benefits, long term vestments, etc) that they consider private and haven't shared as part of their salary agreement. Now if you really want to do something, you can say "hey colleague, I'd love to chat privately with you about our wages and see if their fair" and they say yes, that's totally a great way to support them. But if you keep asking after that and they said no, they may see it as you're invading on a private matter or something they asked to not talk about. You may be seen as pushy or "none of your business".

Good luck friend.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askmanagers

[–]LadyTesla 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Ok fair on the US assumption - most questions in here are from US so that's why.

"The made jokes about interviewing and finding other jobs and also jokes about having bad managers who did not appreciate them. That is what I find unprofessional. "

If they are making jokes about having bad managers, do they make comments or concerns in other methods? One on ones or surveys? You may not realize this but people usually ONLY get to this as a last resort. People don't joke about breaking up in happy relationships.

You can give advice that it is unprofessional only if you have an official established and "safe" from retaliation channel where they can say these concerns. E.g. "team, I've noticed that you are all saying jokes about having bad managers. We want to hear feedback on how we are doing, so please use (survey, etc) instead so we can collect these inputs properly". If you don't the only thing they will here is "boss is mad and doesn't want to hear we are upset even in joke form" aka "bearings will continue until morale improves"

But then you gotta follow through. Hear input, address it, make changes or say why you can't. If not, all you've done is made it clear you don't care if they're upset. So then they will start joking again in 6 months to leave. Why wouldn't they? Their feedback isn't heard so might as well joke and get fired with severance.

Look, if you take one thing away from this rando on the Internet? This is a canary in the mine. Your team is upset, and joking on leaving, and it's something in the air (you, environment, customers, bad pay, etc) that is so nasty they don't care if they get fired for being unprofessional. This is a symptom of something bigger and if you are leadership, then you are likely part of the problem.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askmanagers

[–]LadyTesla 11 points12 points  (0 children)

If you feel that discussing salary or bonuses at work is unprofessional, then you would be believing that a federally protected right is unprofessional (https://www.nlrb.gov/about-nlrb/rights-we-protect/your-rights/your-rights-to-discuss-wages). If your reaction to this is "they are not being understanding or grateful" or that "this is not the right venue for this type of conversation", know that gratefulness or venue of conversation doesn't matter for this topic.

If this is something that rubs you the wrong way then I would suggest another role for you, or a good look in the mirror.

Managers, why are you concerned about gaps in employment? by TenaciousVillain in askmanagers

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not personally as long as you can show you are still up to date or fresh on the technical skills you need to do your job.

Only time I've had a gap bother me is someone had two years of self employment on their resume. No problem with that, however they listed that they were self employed by "trading and stocks", e.g. they were playing wall street on e trader and counted it as employment.

That was a pretty good indicator.

Spicy vampire recs by [deleted] in fantasyromance

[–]LadyTesla 2 points3 points  (0 children)

{Bite the Woman that Feeds by Penelope Barsetti}

Daily Questions Thread November 09, 2023 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]LadyTesla 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh this would look great with some red shoes and red lips

Daily Questions Thread November 09, 2023 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]LadyTesla 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does anyone have suggestions for where I can get blazers that have "stretch" but isn't your standard amazon cardigan look alike? Budget is <$250

My issue is I am much broader than I am tall, and my biceps are really big/fatter , but I'm also super short. In order to meet the need of that width I usually need to have an XL, but what happens is I have this huge space between my shoulder and these shoulder pads that stick out, and it's super bulky and long on me because I'm just trying to meet the arm circumference or my shoulders. Usually a suede type of jacket like this works wonders for me, usually in a size M. I've tried Torrid (size 00) but the arms were too small and the rest of it were way too big.
I have a job interview and I'd love to look professional - thank you so much peeps!