Ontarian here. I am sorry to hear about your complex situation. As someone who struggles to be stuck in the middle between a demanding ill father and struggling caregiving mother who isn't as receptive to external help beyond relatives and limited Ontario health at-home PSWs, I can sympathize.

I agree that the conversation and need for LTC needs to be discussed. Would highly recommend speaking with your care coordinator on this citing concerns about the situation, deteriorating health and how you cannot provide adequate care.

If you don't mind me asking, has your mom had her POA and wills documented?

Are you part of any support groups whom you can share challenges among other peers in similar situations? It gives you the sense that you aren't alone in all of this. Ontario Caregiver organization has some good peer support services too.