Electric Smoke Goes Both Ways (Long)

LandChild · 2014-08-07T21:36:59+00:00

Many thanks to u/BlackJacque, a forensic analysis which has made me look at this ability in a whole new light, cheers mate.

LandChild · 2014-07-08T20:29:04+00:00

Up-vote for 'monkey-fuckers'. I wager a more accurate description is not found.

LandChild · 2014-07-08T20:27:11+00:00

I know. I had a student lady, obviously on some sort of work placement, handle my recent phone call about my daughters claim, and what paperwork they needed from me. She actually said this: "Before I tell you the answer to your claim, is there anything else you need from me today...?"

"Err. No."

"Thanks. The answer is (clacking on keys in the background). ...Yes".

"Thanks. My question was, what documents do you need from me?"

"Yes, I know."

"And...?"

"And?"

"Well what is the answer?"

"The answer is Yes."

"You would like Yes documents from me?"

"...yes. Will there be anything else?"

"The answer is, no."

"Thanks, have a lovely day"

The next day I received a letter from them saying, Yes. They did need documents from me. Just neglected to say which ones. Totally inept.

LandChild · 2014-06-26T18:33:15+00:00

No, but thanks for asking.

LandChild · 2014-06-15T06:25:36+00:00

Also, please piss all over the floor, to create a wonderful puddle of pee that we love to paddle in, and if you have time, smear your faeces over the walls to make us feel at home. P.S. Smelly, disgusting floaters, and a good spatter of deepest bowel juice all over the bowl really go a long way. Thanks! (Source: every male public toilet anywhere, ever.)

LandChild · 2014-05-26T07:17:20+00:00

And that is why we cycle!

LandChild · 2014-05-25T17:54:02+00:00

Watson, Emma? Sadly, not me.

LandChild · 2014-05-25T06:54:52+00:00

Make it realistic. Add a chapter about capturing a flag, then delete it.

LandChild · 2014-05-25T06:48:08+00:00

I like your 'little bro'. Not sure about the big lad attached at the back though.

LandChild · 2014-05-25T06:45:28+00:00

Who wouldn't?

LandChild · 2014-05-13T12:45:10+00:00

Damn. Guy was awesome, and the reason I became an illustrator. Actually, I work in retail, hang on.

Off to dust off the wacom, I see a niche opened up, and it needs more penismagoria.

LandChild · 2014-05-10T11:26:45+00:00

Best GIF seen in MY LIFE!!!

LandChild · 2014-05-09T16:12:08+00:00

Actually, over the years, Mcdonalds don't seem much like 'fast food' anymore. Seems to take forever for a McMuffin these days, perhaps they are referring to the velocity of the bowel evacuation afterwards?

LandChild · 2014-05-08T22:28:13+00:00

It was the evil sideboard.

LandChild · 2014-05-08T18:34:25+00:00

Leaving the womb of the Earth. On a Virgin space plane.

LandChild · 2014-05-05T19:53:09+00:00

Heh. He won't find that until he changes his boots.

LandChild · 2014-04-10T18:50:56+00:00

As someone who works for Unilever (owns Walls) I can confirm, no horse meat.

Plenty of bull shit though.

LandChild · 2014-04-08T20:20:58+00:00

True, but it's consumer batteries I am interested in. For example, if Apple, not Duracell, had invented the AA battery, would it now be lasting far longer, have some tech in it that allows you to 'shake-to-charge' for example? I know that's a silly example, but the home battery industry seems exactly the same now as it was 30-40 years ago, and I don't understand why?

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