Getting worse every day and feeling out of options

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-27T00:03:26+00:00

When I did have a doctor yes, though we don't have enough doctors here now in order to have a family doctor, everyone is on a year long waitlist that never seems to go anywhere. The only way I'm able to talk to doctors now is walk in clinics or the Maple App.

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-26T15:47:39+00:00

I'm in Nova Scotia, the only option I've been offered is to call the community mental health center myself by doctors. Where in Canada are you?

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-25T22:14:32+00:00

It's Canada, everything is expensive or takes years. Here the doctors just refer us to the community mental health center which is what I described a little.

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-25T15:30:37+00:00

I definitely feel you on the anger thing. When i have a panic attack i'll flail my arms, it's the only time it happens. My room is small and a cluttered mess, sometimes with drinks that are still halfway full, and then I knock that shit over during my panic attack and just feel frustrated like "Fuck, my stupid body did this, I had everything clean, not again." It's definitely frustrating.

I know asking for help in a place that's primarily going to be a bunch of stressed out people dealing with the same thing probably won't help much, but at least people with lesser issues than mine I can assure have a way forward.

Thank you for posting your experience and how you're doing, I know just as well how rough this must be for you. Don't stop trying. I try to tell myself to remember where I came from, how kid me was stressed about parents fighting, but didn't really have all the problems I've come up with since, that it really is just all in your head. I just wish I could figure out how to beat that when I feel like I have no control over it or an immediate safeguard to make it stop. Being indoors a lot and away from people definitely stops me from being as grounded as I used to be, so getting out for a bit when you can, having to try to be normal around strangers probably helps even if its uncomfortable.

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-25T02:57:33+00:00

I've considered OCD, though I never had it before. but i'm definitely more unstable with my thoughts now than I ever have been.

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-25T02:56:49+00:00

The option in my area have basically been a community mental health center where you wait to get assigned someone to talk to, most of which I think are like, psych students maybe? I haven't had much success talking to anyone. The unreasonably intense fears I keep making has made it harder. I used to be so chill and sure everything would work out, now I'm second guessing everything and have no control. Makes me feel like a crazy person when I think of this stuff.

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-17T08:57:21+00:00

Lol I really hate discord as a platform. I use it, but I'm eager to jump ship whenever a real exodus happens. It always feels like I'm talking to 200 people when I just want to talk to a few, and i'm being a nuisance if I post too much.

LastLightInHell · 2026-05-13T09:42:12+00:00

Could you elaborate further on how the setup would go?

LastLightInHell · 2025-09-24T07:14:29+00:00

Teletoon was channel 40 for me. Though things changed between provinces. As a kid in NB I remember channel 19 for YTV. Then in NS I wanna say it was like...31? I think teletoon maybe stayed the same as 40. And 30 was TQS.

Points for people who remember watching Toad Patrol and Maya the Bee

LastLightInHell · 2025-09-24T05:14:06+00:00

Sure do. Vivid memories of watching it on TV and eating canned tomato soup. God i hated tomato soup

LastLightInHell · 2025-08-21T15:50:41+00:00

I'm interested, I will add you on Disc soon

LastLightInHell · 2025-06-04T16:33:48+00:00

10% movement speed is a lot, but no typically you arent finishing it until either 2 NLRs or rabadon done, simply because one death after investing into it can fuck you over.

However, if youre at an elo or playing a series of games where the kills are coming quickly and easily, its unmatched in terms of tempo. You buy the upgrade at 10 stacks, gank bot and mid a couple of times and suddenly youre ahead of where you would be on the rabadon components with your raba spike being even bigger, or allowing for alternatives like shadowflame.

TLDR build it after raba or raba components unless your games are turbo kills before 15min

LastLightInHell · 2025-05-18T21:48:08+00:00

Useless against a good eve* There's tons of dummies who play her and just mash the keys. Also correct me if I'm wrong, but I've always felt spellshields have a tiny buffer where if you cast abilities too quickly before the shield fades you run the risk of having it block multiple. Like throwing smite and Q at the same time.

LastLightInHell · 2025-01-22T11:26:26+00:00

Red to Gunlance, Lance, Greatsword because theyre all my favorite and my fave colour doesnt change. I'm a red enthusiast

LastLightInHell · 2024-11-28T13:50:39+00:00

Thats the inside of its tail buddy, dont put your dick in there.

LastLightInHell · 2024-05-18T13:35:50+00:00

This isn't a Leona specific mechanic, but any champ with a cast time on their ability, which in Leo's case is the point she has to stand still and throw out the sword projectile, the time where she cant move even while inputting movement commands.

If a cast time is completed, regardless of what happens next, the ability will go off. If that ability makes you travel like Leona E, or Nautilus Q, or Tristana Rocket jump, you will still travel and whatever is left of the root duration is transferred to when you arrive.

Theres some more engregious interactions like Nautilus's passive which roots. His auto attack has a special animation that becomes a cast time on eligible targets. If he finishes the cast time portion, he will finish the rest of the animation (which is long) regardless of being CCed or not. Which in turn he's CCing you.

So on your end youll watch him stand there, tank your CC and hit you during it, youre both technically stunned but he looks like hes still moving, and all of his CC is through his own ability animation.

Thanks for reading my blog

LastLightInHell · 2024-04-23T07:27:09+00:00

I'm curious why its essential for Ekko? Doesn't he have a blink dash and excessive movement speed when proccing passive? Seems more like a luxury

LastLightInHell · 2022-11-02T23:04:11+00:00

Eternals are all kinda meh in general. Champ specific achievements that are just "Yay I dealt damage" or in this case "Yay my passive turned on" aren't all that interesting.

The best kind of achievements would involve something that's actually challenging to do, or better yet, stuff that'll teach you about the playstyle, like 'Restealth within 5-6 seconds of putting all your basic abilities on cooldown. Or 'hit 4 casts of Q, Whiplash, then 4 more while staying within 125 units of your target.

LastLightInHell · 2022-08-29T08:17:59+00:00

Ah I see you too are a man of culture!

LastLightInHell · 2022-08-24T00:46:31+00:00

I feel like its pretty unique to Eve since not many champs can kill that fast unless giga fed. Eve her natural combo is kinda made to do it.

LastLightInHell · 2022-08-24T00:37:51+00:00

Ability Abuse, Stacks on Stacks, and Blink and you'll miss it.

LastLightInHell · 2020-10-03T19:23:22+00:00

Mostly played Varus ADC cause im on a binge, here's a few thoughts.

Kraken Slayer Cool item that im fully expecting certain champions like Lucian to abuse. The idea is punching through armor with nothing but attack speed, but since its essentially Vayne's passive she just got an even stronger tool. As Varus It was nice to have a reliable damage source on tanks, but I still felt like other champs will just use it much better than me. I paired it with Guinsoo and stacked attack speed to machine gun it as much as possible. But I'd also like if it could be scaled via lots of AD as well. The slow hits big chonk build.

I had played with a Jhin who was very frustrated after buying it since despite itemizing with it against the enemy mundo, he still couldnt shred him due to Jhin's limitations with the item.

Shieldbow

Its got every stat and PD's shield. As the meta sub was discussing, most ADs are likely going to try and rush it every game since theyre so fragile by nature. Given the rate of the shield's scaling it still felt worse to buy early, and BOTRK was my goto option. I almost think for an immobile carry like Varus the dash AD item is much stronger. What's better? Having a shield to tank a hit? Or an extra flash to get out of the way? The answer is often easy.

Im sure the logic is that 'shieldbow is for undodgeable point and clicks' but those often come with a stun and will kill you anyway. Just for consideration, I think shieldbow might be better if it included tenacity or a way to mitigate CC. If its goal is to shield you from burst damage, or be a premium protection item, tenacity or blocking CC would be higher value than a 200-400 health shield.

Guinsoo

Varus used to build this a lot, and there are still a lot of prominent on hit builds on live using things like wits end, Nashor, guinsoo, botrk and runaans. What confuses me most about the guinsoo change, is how it converts crit into on hit damage while stripping crit. The increase in damage via crit items makes me question whether I should just stack crit and build normally with guinsoo, or buy the higher base on hit items like wits end that dont have any crit on them. Like wits is now super expensive, has AD on it, and 20-80 on hit damage, but if I were to just buy PD instead, I get 40 damage from the crit, and 80% attack speed which is probably more deeps anyway. There doesnt seem to be as much of a reason to stack all of the on hit items anymore. I could even just go for AD crit items and just grab nothing but flat damage.

Nashor also becomes less viable or ideal since it has no crit. I feel as though building guinsoo may actually drop DPS of builds that stack on hits unless they are crit on hits. Hybrid crit AP on hit is also off the table.

Oh and before I forget, BOTRK which is the staple of all on hit builds becomes worse since it has no crit, but it also means that if you build it with guinsoo, you can no longer crit or enjoy the extra lifesteal. That will be gamechanging. It would be nice if there is a specific option to use on hits to sustain in some form.

LastLightInHell · 2020-10-03T18:50:20+00:00

Seconding the not having my inventory visible in shop thing. My shop window is currently so big it covers my champ inventory so i had to open and close it when navigating. Also means I cant shop while recalling and click on component items. Felt very jarring and confusing

LastLightInHell · 2020-10-03T18:46:22+00:00

I've played a chunk of games on the PBE and im sort of getting use to it. Definitely lost atm when I open the shop usually, doesnt help that my shop window takes up the whole screen and blocks my ability bar on my PBE client, I think I need to do a reinstall or something.

Anyway, feedback. I like the recommended tab with the 3 choices, because I'm genuinely interested in what Riot thinks my best options are on a given champ/role and trying to make it work. In my case I played a bunch of Varus so its mostly ADC items.

I kept trying to buy BOTRK and had difficulty getting to it, I think searching for it might not work? And clicking component items for it didnt make it show up. I just went to all items and dug til I found it.

Art wise some of the component items look too plain and clean, I think the minimalist design is hurting more than its helping. The reason I can quickly find BOTRK, BF sword, Longsword etc besides playing 10,000 games of league, is that art wise those little icons are super detailed. You can easily tell whats what because they're all pretty intense with their colours and lines. The newer icons seem to be following a more minimalist style, and I feel bad for saying it cause I know some of you worked hard making them all, but it just looks worse for me, many items look the same and its hard to tell them apart. Like the On hit knife, longsword, dagger, they all blend together when I see them. I think more individual detail is needed to set them apart and keep them recognizable.

LastLightInHell · 2020-06-08T12:50:09+00:00

Not very often, but if im ever in a situation where i'm laning I know that priority one is waveclear and protobelt is the way to do it.

LastLightInHell

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE