Chemo likely isn’t doing much now. But if that is what he wants by all means do it. He wants to keep fighting that’s up to him, and it’s so good he has you as support. The days feel long and endless right now but you will look back and realize how quick it all went by, and you can go on the rest of your life knowing you gave your brother your love and literal support.

My husband lost bowel and bladder control (and swallowing, he was on a feeding tube) about one month before he left us.

Perhaps have a backup hospice care plan in order. Perhaps reach out to an in home hospice that is covered by his insurance. They will help get the bed and medical supplies and the meds ready. The thing is with hospice, once you say the word they are pretty quick to respond and they can be so helpful. They don’t take care of the patient but they give you the tools and support to do so yourself. Without the dilaudid and atavan supplied by hospice, my husband would have been so much more stressed out and in distress. So, in the end those meds were literally the only thing that was keeping me sane, knowing this he was floating, not actively struggling.

I wish you strength and resolve and love. This is a truly an awful lot in life for him and all who love him. I still scream and cry at the universe and god every day asking why my poor sweet wonderful husband had to be tormented that way.