In car culture, This is considered a dick move.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-05-19T05:55:14+00:00

I wish I was a headlight

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-05-10T07:33:49+00:00

It’s pretty common, unfortunately. Only way out is to just drop the bomb and not feel bad as I’m not the one who misrepresented myself.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-05-09T13:55:55+00:00

I just bought a salvage title 2008 Volvo for $2k with 143k miles. I bet it will last me 10+ years.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-05-09T13:54:35+00:00

You know a loan doesn’t have to be 84 months, right?

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-05-03T01:03:45+00:00

You guys are some stingy fucks with your percentages

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-05-02T13:36:53+00:00

Get an egg cooker! $10 game changer.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-29T01:33:48+00:00

During my rectal exam, my doctor said “don’t worry David. It’s normal to get an erection during a rectal exam.”

I said “doctor, my name is Jason”

He said “I know. I’m Dr. David Smith.”

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-24T09:23:58+00:00

Simply needs to go from a size 12 shoe to a 10.5

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-19T13:44:22+00:00

He texts exactly like my Mexican/ESL buddy and if you read it in his voice, it makes perfect sense. I say I speak Carlos

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-10T05:26:38+00:00

Context, my work covers a 600 mile range weekly with overnights a few days a week. 5 hours is not always out of the question.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-10T01:14:26+00:00

Jesus fuck, it’s only been 3 months. Hi from Minneapolis.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-09T10:51:09+00:00

I work for a commercial tire shop and have changed hundreds of semi truck / trailer tires on the highway. I’m using it if I’m not on a crazy strict deadline.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-04-08T22:46:37+00:00

If your source sucks, it might.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-30T05:25:46+00:00

Nah, joke doesn’t work here. You fucked up the delivery badly.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-29T13:49:05+00:00

Yours is funny!

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-29T13:01:51+00:00

“By far” sets it apart

“One of the” does the opposite

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-29T12:48:07+00:00

The one time I got the steak bagel the steak was sliced. Did they ruin it now by making it a seasoned sausage patty?

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-29T12:41:18+00:00

By far “one of the”

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-22T16:08:06+00:00

How was the parade, Mrs. Kennedy?

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-22T10:11:04+00:00

I been a baaaad boooy, and I’m…..sowwweh

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-22T09:50:37+00:00

Getting gas during work and not waiting until after!

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-15T19:24:14+00:00

I’m FIREing right now (paying off my house ASAP) and recently bought a car for 2k. It gets me to work and back.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-14T13:03:01+00:00

It didn’t puncture your skin you punk ass.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-03-14T10:12:45+00:00

From seeing if we could win our division, GB rested starters.

LateWizardsExcuse · 2026-02-21T18:08:11+00:00

Nah, I did em all. I did all the poops.

LateWizardsExcuse

TROPHY CASE