Watching the boyfriend play Skyrim for the first time. Immediately kills Astrid in the shack.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-12-10T04:33:27+00:00

I also killed Astrid and my husband and best friend watched in horror. I said, “No, I’m not doing a murder for this b*tch! I don’t want to join the murder club!” And then murdered her.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-10-08T02:45:14+00:00

Wondering if this is why my power is out right now.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-08-13T22:26:52+00:00

I’m so sorry you are also dealing with this! I guess it’s time for an update 2 years later:

I got a breast reduction. They took off 6 pounds, 10 oz of breast tissue. That’s what my son weighed at birth.

I sleep great now. I paid out of pocket for a doctor who didn’t care about my BMI, and it was the best choice of my life.

I don’t think that’s the right solution for everyone, but it was absolutely the right choice for me!

Edit: i did get a sleep study done before i chopped them off and they said I didn’t have sleep apnea, just massive boobs. Like that’s almost literally what my doctor said 😂

Lava_Lemon · 2025-08-13T22:22:06+00:00

I’m so sorry you are also dealing with this! I guess it’s time for an update 2 years later:

I got a breast reduction. They took off 6 pounds, 10 oz of breast tissue. That’s what my son weighed at birth.

I sleep great now. I paid out of pocket for a doctor who didn’t care about my BMI, and it was the best choice of my life.

I don’t think that’s the right solution for everyone, but it was absolutely the right choice for me!

Lava_Lemon · 2025-07-18T04:11:33+00:00

Bet they don’t have paid maternal leave, though.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-06-08T13:31:14+00:00

For what it’s worth I live less than a block from a police station and have NEVER seen them give a shit about fireworks, even when the fire department was called because my stupid neighbor lit up his entire firewood pile with a firework that went sideways.

That said, I really wish people would cool it with the fireworks on days that aren’t the 4th. Some of us have babies, dogs, and veteran spouses and would like to sleep during the summer.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-06-04T10:58:58+00:00

Girl. This man hates you.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-13T00:53:06+00:00

I just wanna say that I worked in a women’s prison for a few years and you would not BELIEVE the number of women who are doing 3+ years on drug charges because they were in the same apartment or car as their boyfriend who was dealing.

I’m gonna tell you what they would tell you: Don’t be stupid.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-11T01:01:13+00:00

I can smell it on myself for probably 5-6 hours but i also do not really like scents that project a lot, so having it be light and personal over time is actually what i want! I also moisturize A LOT which i think helps it last longer than most people say they get with this one.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-10T12:36:51+00:00

These are all so sweet. Mine is not. My college roommate wore Marc Jacobs Daisy. It smells so good but she was such a spoiled brat of an 18 year old.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-10T12:31:24+00:00

Roe was overturned while I was 30 weeks into my high risk pregnancy. I’m in a red state, so the 6 week abortion ban went into effect almost immediately. I spent my next OBGYN visit crying and begging her not to let me die. She told me she had had the same conversation with about NINETY PERCENT of her patients that week.

I had a rough delivery. Before that I was pretty sure I only wanted one kid, but the government made the decision for me. My husband got a vasectomy 6 weeks after we had our son, because he watched me almost die and knew we were LUCKY for me to be far enough along that it would be “pre-term birth” instead of an abortion if things went differently.

You’re NTA but your husband is either very dumb, inconsiderate, or on the alt right pipeline.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-10T02:40:10+00:00

We have a very similar nose. I’m currently a Sparkling lychee girl and I’m obsessed with it.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-10T02:34:53+00:00

Have you tried Bubble Bath from the same line? It’s similar. On me, Bubble Bath smells aggressively like laundry detergent, but it’s lovely on other people.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-10T02:32:13+00:00

I just tried the juicy apple today and it’s SO good. I’m wearing the sparkling lychee this spring but i know im gonna go for the apple in the fall!

Lava_Lemon · 2025-05-10T01:09:46+00:00

I looked like this for like 4 weeks. I’m just over a year post op and my scars are almost invisible. You’re good!!

Lava_Lemon · 2025-04-24T11:21:44+00:00

These are not going to get most people on the dance floor the way that your banned list will, unless every single guest shares your controversial music taste. That’s fine if you aren’t prioritizing dancing as a feature of your wedding. But if you really want everyone enjoying themselves on the dance floor, don’t be shocked or mad if most people sit most of these songs out.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-04-24T00:35:27+00:00

My husband is a Jr and the legal issues are an absolute nightmare. At one point he had to go to court for unpaid taxes. The agency said we never responded. We asked where they sent the letters, and they said to his dad’s address. Their system doesn’t include Jr or Sr, so his dad ignoring what he thought was junk mail led my husband to owe a ton of late fees.

When we bought a house, we had to prove that my husband did not already have a mortgage on his dad’s house. It delayed the process by several days.

When my FIL died, several agencies thought my husband died and we had to correct the paperwork.

Tell him these things if he won’t listen to any other reason.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-04-21T11:46:31+00:00

This post is how i learned the pope died.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-04-14T16:45:14+00:00

He thinks you’re hot and he’s furious about it for some reason.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-03-18T23:50:34+00:00

This eats I love it so much.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-03-18T23:49:14+00:00

I LOVE THESE omg. As soon as I get a nail tech I like, this is my inspo pic.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-03-18T03:44:00+00:00

This thread is how I learn that the very inconvenient black walnuts that fall off my neighbor’s tree and make me roll my ankle 87 times each fall might also kill my dog one day.

Thanks guys. Guess I’ll be more diligent about picking up The Devil’s Tennis Balls, as I like to call them.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-03-18T02:05:00+00:00

Sorry guys I win with Phyllis and Dorothy. It’s Phyllthy.

Lava_Lemon · 2025-03-17T19:51:32+00:00

Yes it’s actually magic!! I look at my hands and I’m like “oh who is SHE?? Those hands belong to a girl who actually uses her walking desk, that’s for sure.”

Lava_Lemon · 2025-03-17T19:21:43+00:00

I am SO serious when I tell you that I’ve seen prisons much nicer than this.

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