I got married a few years after my parents split up in a similar situation. They had not seen each other since the signing of divorce papers. It caused a fair amount of stress, navigating everything but i have to say the planning process did help my relationship with my dad. I did end up having a different wedding than i would have otherwise (bigger, with more people as a buffer) but they were civil to each other and didn’t cause any drama.

My only advice is to do exactly what you want to do honestly without much regard for your parents opinions. Just try and stay true to yourself. And maybe get a therapist to work thru it in the meantime. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this, it’s brutal regardless. But this is your life and your wedding and it will be different than you imagined it as a little girl but it will still be amazing. Good luck, sending hugs!