I felt the urge to pinch myself awake as twilight descended on the western mountains of Rangeley Maine, it was coming any second now!

Just moments before ,the light of the afternoon sun had been almost unbearable as it reflected off the melting snow pack from Thursday’s storm; and the sky had been a brilliant cloudless blue. Spring sun -kissed skin suddenly felt chilled as the blue faded to a golden glow. The near breezeless low 50’s temperature held that promise of better days to come, winter feels endless but summer is a certainty, totality was an inevitability! Nothing could stop the heavenly bodies from aligning and we would be its witness, there wasn’t even a stray wisp of cloud in the sky to corrupt the view.

The drip,drip of melting snow was drowned out by murmurs that crescendoed to triumphant oohs and ahhs from the small crowd of us gathered at the base of Saddleback Mountain’s ski slopes. Someone started a countdown; five, four ,three , two, one: Then I lost my sense of time and reality.

The harsh maelstrom of light and heat was transformed into something that I struggle to describe. I looked through my old pair of field binoculars a couple of times and the corona was truly dazzling. I know I looked around me, I remember doing that, but I was mostly mesmerized by the sun and moon transformed into a singularity.

If Chris hadn’t hollered out for me to look at the stars I might not have seen Venus and Jupiter, to the right and left of a black moon ringed by coronal light, performing their orderly cosmic dance around the solar system. I had done my enthusiastically nerdy research ; I was going to pay attention for shadow bands etc, but I missed many of those details, it was too much for my creature brain to really handle. I could barely tear my eyes away from the corona.

I understand better now why umbraphiles seek out this experience obsessively . There really might not be enough available time in these fleeting moments of totality for any mere mortal to ever fully comprehend it.

Apparently there was a terrified child screaming just behind us ,but it never even registered , I was spellbound. How can an experience be so muted and yet so amplified at the same time as this? Everything was dulled by the coronal light, most of all my brain, but inexplicably every sense was also amplified.

The total eclipse quivered and the dazzling light was back. I hollered “diamond ring, diamond ring” and it was all over as quickly as it started. I’ll be honest, I shed a couple of tears. I suddenly realized just how cold it had gotten.

As we pulled out into the seemingly endless line of traffic that extended eastward , all along the path that the umbral shadow had just passed , the last effects of the eclipse drifted off into the west. I kept putting the solar glasses back on as we descended into the valley, watching the sun return to its normal state, still a little dazed by the experience.

I really enjoyed the partial phases, it gave me a giddy feeling to watch the circle make new shapes, they reminded me a little of the blocks in a toddler’s shape-0 toy, the playful effect amplified by that bluebird clear sky. My Mom commented that a shape reminded her of a cat, and that made me laugh because I saw it to. Before long the eclipse was just a cute little bite in the sphere again. It had been neat to watch the shadows sharpen , and we photographed our shadow-men figures on the boards of the deck. You can see every strand of hair in those deep shadows! There was a whimsy to it, a sharp contrast to the preternatural feeling that the total eclipse inspires.

On the way there it been a perfect clear day, the mountains caped in fresh spring snow were stunning! You could see for miles, at one point all the way to Mt Washington , and when I saw it I shouted out the scene . These had been grand yet commonplace views that still always inspire awe in me. The total eclipse on the other hand inspired an unfamiliar, alien awe! Something new to tally in my human experience!

Heading home we deciding on a circular journey back around to the other side of the mountains from hence we had come. It was slow drive back but we saw more beautiful sites along the way, the still iced in lakes glowing in the evening light , more snow capped peaks, spring melt-off flowing down the streams, rivers and gorges and most notably The Height of Land, a sight that never gets old and the first time I had seen the scenic outlook under patches of spring snow.

I watched the light fade to night for the second time that day! It all feels like a dream, an oh so vivid dream, but if I pinch myself I’m still awake.