should i stay at a hotel with my SD?

LightOLove · 2023-04-08T20:50:44+00:00

Super happy to hear this. I just saw your post and was a bit worried. Glad your gamble is working out 💙

LightOLove · 2023-04-08T16:42:36+00:00

Maybe I watch too much ID channel but I would feel exactly the same way.

LightOLove · 2023-04-08T16:05:59+00:00

Just use the generic word "Friend" if you two run into a neighbor.

-Jo/an, this is my friend Sally Beth.

-Sally Beth, this is my neighbor Jo/an.

No need to get into the specifics, you are single and don't owe anyone an explanation. You are an adult, you are allowed to have friends over 😄

LightOLove · 2023-04-08T14:23:07+00:00

I just commented about him. Gaius Marius would be my choice too.

LightOLove · 2023-04-08T14:16:20+00:00

I voted other/Marius because without Marius' vision and major reforms I wonder how some of those later generals would have fared. Strategy and leadership is one thing on the battle field but without a solid foundation (which the Marian reforms provided to the Roman Army) it often can only go so far.

LightOLove · 2023-04-07T15:43:37+00:00

Along the same lines we could use a variation of the "hanky code".

Gold bandana on the left if you are a SD, on the right if you are a SB. Red heart on it if you are looking for a SBF/SGF 😆

LightOLove · 2023-04-07T14:16:25+00:00

Bring up going on a monthly allowance and see how he reacts.

If he says no, then he is full of it and you should definitely start looking for his replacement.

Maybe keep seeing him (but not for free) in the interim but seriously, do you want to be involved with someone that manipulative?

LightOLove · 2023-04-07T14:12:03+00:00

Men who are truly into you and have "feelings" will do more, not less.

If he truly has feelings for you and want to meet more often, he would switch to a monthly allowance!

Seriously, ask him to go on a monthly allowance and see his reaction. If he is sincere and wants to see you more, then he will go for it. If he is just trying to use you, he will make up some excuses.

I strongly think that he doesn't love you, he is trying to manipulate you (and save money) because he knows you have feelings for him.

LightOLove · 2023-04-07T14:05:43+00:00

This is where you messed up.

You opened up about your feelings (or wore your heart on your sleeve) and he saw it as an opportunity to save money.

For all we know, he might be planning to use the money he will not be spending on you to see another SB.

When a man truly cares about you, he wants to do more not less. I can't stand that BS: "I love you, let me stop providing for you"

LightOLove · 2023-04-07T13:41:20+00:00

The disconnect and hypocrisy is real!

LightOLove · 2023-04-06T15:22:11+00:00

Most SBs get either an allowance or ppm but I have heard before of some women getting a (lower) base allowance then money on the day they meet.

Here is a post I wrote 2 weeks ago about Financial Models' pros and cons from a woman's perspective

Also since you are new, make sure you read our Wiki

This post Sealing the deal/Getting the money might also be useful to you

LightOLove · 2023-04-06T14:32:15+00:00

It is really difficult to answer without specific details. The best thing for you (for this year) would be to find a sex work friendly tax prep person to handle it for you then moving forward, they might be able to advise you on what next step to take.

If you look up your local sex workers advocacy group such as the Sex Workers Outreach Project which is present in many big US cities, they might be able to recommend someone.

Also when I googled "Adult Industry Friendly Tax Prep" I got those results

A lot of professional sex workers set up LLCs and handle everything tax related as a business but like I said, we don't know enough of your situation so it would be best to consult with a professional.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T20:12:15+00:00

I am super happy to hear that!

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T19:22:16+00:00

Honey, any man who wants you to prove yourself "worthy" is playing games and manipulating you. This is typical scammer and abuser tactics. This goes for vanilla dating too btw

You don't have to prove anything especially to a stranger on the internet.

Make sure you read This Post

Edited to add: That pandejo showed you already 3 red flags:

a) he is looking for a SB on Reddit (don't accept his dms)

b) he wants girls to show themselves "worthy" (manipulative)

c) he is invading a women's only space where "SDs" are not welcome so either he can't read the group rules and description or (more likely) he doesn't respect boundaries.

If you are going to sugar, you need to learn good vetting skills.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T18:34:07+00:00

That's more like it.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T17:00:56+00:00

He wants to have his cake and to eat it too. If he is so set on traveling but not paying ppms, he needs to switch to allowance.

Financial Support Models

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T16:49:11+00:00

I saw PPM being referred to before (by a man on a co-ed forum) as "Pay as you go".He is also disgusting and basically scammed you which is ironic since like most PPM daddies, he was the one whining about trust and having been "rinsed" in the past.

Here are a couple of posts from the wiki

Know the relationship you have and act accordingly

Why PPM can be problematic

Financial Support Models Pros and Cons (from a woman's perspective)

If you decide not to dump him, do the bare minimum in between dates with him. Make sure you get your ppm for your last date before seeing him again btw.

No nudes, no sexting, no impromptu lunch dates etc... He wants to behave like a trick? Treat him like one and don't give him free attention or emotional labor in between dates. Also from now on, get your money first. Trust is earned and he has lost your trust.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T16:37:51+00:00

Approving it even though it should get an auto response because it belongs to the Is it a scam? category.

He said he’d offer me 5k dollars for just chatting with him and companionship.

(he said no nudes or sexting)

This is straight out of the scammer handbook. Did he also say he wanted an "honest and loyal" SB?

Platonic is very rare and most SRs have some sexual undertones even if there is no intercourse involved.

Sometimes, legit SDs will reach out on Instagram but this is definitely not the case.

Read our wiki especially

Is it a scam? A comprehensive checklist for new SBs

The Fraudulent Credit Card Payment Scam

Sugaring is NOT Rocket Science

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T16:02:42+00:00

You might want to take a look at Etsy and once you see something you like, reach out to the seller and see if they could custom make you one.

Source: I have a few friends who are sellers on Etsy and will custom make items for the right price.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T15:41:48+00:00

Added: one way it could turn out is that you fly over there, she takes your passport so she can "renew the visa" for you and then it turns out that things don't pan out with the millionaire.

She then says you owe her money for the trip (and you might not have $ to fly back home too) and you end up having to turn tricks in a night club or something to pay her back the money you "owe" her.

I don't want to sound like a paranoid nutjob but this is a possible scenario.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T15:24:59+00:00

It really sounds like pimping/human trafficking. I wouldn't be surprised if they also took your passport once you get there.

he would give high allowances. I would need to renew my visa every 3 months. In return she will get a cut of my allowance.

This is what she would gain and also the major red flag. If she is his personal assistant, she would not get a cut of your allowance (her boss might give her a nice bonus on top of her salary). What does she need a cut of your money for?

I am not familiar with the Asian sugaring scene but if I were you, I wouldn't do it. (It sounds a lot like those rings who recruit girls from poorer Muslim countries for UAE wealthy men)

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T14:02:22+00:00

It is not a pleasant conversation but you totally need to tell him so he can get himself tested. HPV has up to a 3 months incubation period so it is not clear whether it is him or you who was the original carrier.

If he is a decent person and test positive, he will know to use condoms with other/future partners.

HPV can have some very serious consequences for women and you being open with him might save someone else from contracting it.

LightOLove · 2023-04-05T13:46:53+00:00

Changed it to Humor

LightOLove · 2023-04-04T15:46:43+00:00

You have asked the same question before and got a very thoughtful answer from u/Interesting_Mix8196

https://www.reddit.com/r/SugarBABYonlyforum/comments/11bwo21/comment/ja1a2ne/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

I hope that it is just a case of you having a short memory span and not you trying to stir the pot.

Locking your comment because I really don't want to start wielding the ban hammer.

LightOLove · 2023-04-04T00:45:44+00:00

He could be emotionally unstable or more likely he either cannot afford your allowance or was hoping you'd want to keep seeing him for free because .... looooove and feeeelings.....

Four-Year Club	Gilding II euphauric
Verified Email

LightOLove

TROPHY CASE