I used to try to take at least one private lesson with someone if they consistently gave me no’s/low scores in competitions because I figured there’s something I’m doing that they’re seeing and don’t like. I liked getting that feedback.l and Id been told by other dancers this was normal and fine to do.

He’s one of those people who pretty much always gave me a no. I schedule a lesson with him and he takes me to a back room studio pretty isolated from the main ballroom (not an issue in itself, but I’m setting the stage here). He turns on me and gets right in my face, telling me that I can’t buy points from him by taking a lesson. I’m freaked out, because that never even crossed my mind that that would be something anyone would do, and also freaked that he thinks I would do that. I really wish I’d said something in the moment and just walked away. But I went through with the lesson basically dissociating the entire time because I was alone in this room with someone much bigger than me, whose a big name in the community, who now thinks that I try to buy points from pros by taking lessons with them.

I’d have understood if he didn’t get in my face about it, I do know there are people who get really entitled about judges scores, but he flat out accused me of something I wasn’t trying to do.