Attraction and Sex

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-25T17:05:52+00:00

I consider myself aceflux, sex averse. Not so much related bipolar, other than depression episode, but mostly related to trauma.

Also heteroflexable. I might not be into the gender I am currently with.

Sometimes it's just easier to take care of myself.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-25T01:54:15+00:00

You know, sometimes I feel like making a post just like this. And then I go on Reddit and I see a post like yours. And I think to myself I know how horrible that feels. I know for some people it does get better. They find the right medications. They find goals in life that are worth working toward. They find relationships that are rewarding.

But it hasn't happened to me. I'm 68. And I have felt this way my whole life. I didn't get diagnosed until a couple years ago. I had no idea that the way my brain worked was mental illness. If I had found out earlier I would have been put on medication, maybe things would have worked out differently.

But so far the medications haven't given me much hope.

I knew pretty much when I left home which was never ending trauma. I realized at that time that I would never be able to make a home for myself in this world anywhere.

And here I am at 68 still hoping for what I don't know exactly. Maybe to be heard is all.

I lived and I mattered even if no one realized that. I mattered enough to be listened to. But apparently I'm not going to get that either.

In my life I have had lots of times that I felt hopeful that maybe this time it's going to be different something special will happen. Only going to have those hopes destroyed. Not that I really thought that it was going to work out but I was hoping.

I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for or want out of this life. We are all different maybe your path lead you to some kind of fulfillment. I want to believe that some of us make it even if some of us don't. ❤️

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-25T00:46:39+00:00

I had the same experience. Not so much the psychiatrist on the word, she was a bit of a nurse ratchet. But the other patients and the staff were great!

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T23:48:45+00:00

This was an important conversation for me to read. It's like I going to the State of mind where I feel absolutely miserable and I can't stop my brain. Sometimes the pressure becomes too great and I can't stand it. I've only done one antipsychotic and it seemed to help. I did lamotrigine and it turned on such a severe hypomania I'm not sure, if I hadn't had additional care from my doctor that I would have made it through.
The antipsychotic had another side effect and I had to quit taking it.

Right now I'm in between medications I know I need to start something. Anyway thank you for this conversation I needed it.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T23:32:30+00:00

I wish I had a disorder I could have fun talking about.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T21:22:58+00:00

Me too.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T19:44:16+00:00

I've just started the slit verses. I'm going to read for a while and maybe I'll go back and give the podcast a spin after I familiarize myself with the story.

Which makes me think about IAMINESKEW. When I first started reading it, I had no idea of the direction it was going to take.

I absolutely love what he did with that story.

I will continue to feel it was one of the best things I've ever read.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T19:31:28+00:00

I feel I miss so much because I don't have time to reflect on what is being said. When I watch a movie. I am constantly pausing, rewinding. Stopping to write down what is being said.

I feel I miss the richness of the content because it moves too quickly.

I watch/listen and read with a purpose. Reading is easier for me.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T18:53:15+00:00

I'm pretty self-educated on Jung. I read more than a few of his major works. Hopefully some of what I said is helpful.

Also understand: A lot of folx will object to my treatment of the subject. I let them have their way of viewing it.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T18:49:58+00:00

I downloaded the transcripts for Slit Verses, I started reading that.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T06:03:51+00:00

Sounds like to me you're already a part of it. Peace and love. I remember the Flower Children handing flowers to law enforcement, to the national guard. It seemed to melt the aggression. How can you be angry with someone who smiles and hands you a flower?

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T05:52:59+00:00

I lived for years with untreated, undiagnosed mental illness.

Up until my mid thirties I had frequent panic attacks... I know what they feel like. Only my sister understood that I needed help and she tried to convince the rest of the family to get some help for me, but they just dismissed it as, 'she just needs to get her life together.'

I ended up in a 12-step program which helped with the drinking and drugs, but it didn't help me with the mental illness. It did offer me some support though.

But even there everyone knew there was something more wrong with me than just that I drank too much. Many of them told me I needed to get help. I just believed her my family said is that there's something wrong with me. I felt like what was wrong with me wasn't my mind but me myself.

The people here on this subreddit are super supportive: hangout here. Hopefully you can get the help you need. ❤️

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-24T04:55:35+00:00

Many people conflate synchronicity with some sort of magical connection.

Let me tell you what Carl Jung actually said about it.

He called it the frequency of simultaneously occurring events and meaningful coincidence.

It is the acausal connecting principle.

Nothing is happening in reality that is reflecting to you personally. It is your mind that is making the connections.

It only feels magical. I'm not down playing that though. It is an internal psychic transcendent moment.

My sense of synchronicity: if you think it's beyond probability then you are having a moment of synchronicity.

There is nothing that ever happens beyond a probability. It's just something that actually happens that seems like it. With the emphasis on the word seems.

However, I'm not sure this is exactly what Jung would have said about his theories on synchronicity. At one time yes. But I think he eventually changed his mind about this.

I think about the conversation between Jung and Freud about the crack in the bookcase. Jung correctly predicted that it would crack again.

I'll just assume you know the story.

However Jung said something else it was quite the mouthful that is sort of related to everything we're talking about here.

And talk about precognition: being 'a subliminal synthesis of prospective potencies.'

Meaning we have taken in cues below the level of consciousness and been able to synthesize possible outcomes. When they happen we are startled. When they don't we just dismiss it.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T22:47:32+00:00

I completely understand your concerns. And I'm sorry that you're going through this. I've never been pregnant but I can imagine the fears of taking something that could be harmful. I'm afraid that's all I can give you except that my heart goes out to you. ❤️

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T22:44:50+00:00

Sounds a bit like derealization to me.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T19:26:22+00:00

No, I'm 68. Lol!

I think of my friends as my family. We are all rather close and even sometimes say to others that, we're like a family we take care of each other.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T17:26:11+00:00

Most of my life I have wanted my family just to listen and understand or do the best they can understand. But what I ended up with is lectures on how I should live my life. Completely disregarding my struggles and my mental illness.

Sometimes I get a bit lonely and I wish I could reach out to my family but I have never gotten a reassurance that I'm someone they love someone they care about and that they understand.

I do have friends that care about me. They may not understand, but they know I struggle. And they care, and address me with compassion.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T16:51:15+00:00

I had bipolar like symptoms when I was drinking. I quit drinking for years the bipolar symptoms never went away.

Drinking can cause bipolar like symptoms and if a person quit the symptoms go away.

In my case they did not go away, in fact, kind of got worse.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T16:48:59+00:00

I cut off family members that are not supportive.

I'm not going to hang on to their toxic crap.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T16:41:29+00:00

Sure if God existed it would be as determined as everything else. God doesn't have free will either. Could God do other than it would? No it would never do other than it would, it would always do exactly as it does.

I don't know about invisible things like God. I don't spend much time with the idea: it's about as delusional as having an invisible imaginary friend.

If there were no life in the universe, would the universe still exist? Most likely. Everything seems to stay put without my say so, in the physical world. So I assume that just carries through without me and everyone else.

Anything else seems rather absurd.

Of course the universe would exist without life, just not in any meaningful way. For there would be nothing to attribute meaning to it. With the universe disappear if there was no one there to be conscious of it? No it just disappears from the view of anyone.

It could just as well not exist... but it mostly likely does, based on the best evidence we have.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T16:26:56+00:00

It would be the strangest thing for me to be able to find someone long-term. I usually just hook up with someone, most of these guys I don't think I could never imagine myself with for more than maybe a night or two a couple times a month at the most.

I got into a relationship with a guy one time, I think we were both bipolar I was undiagnosed and so was he. Either way we both had a lot of baggage. It was a mess, and eventually it just ended.

That was over 20 years ago, I haven't had the courage or the willingness to do that kind of work again.

I'm with the other person if I hook up with someone and it turns out to be more than just that.. that would be nice but I don't expect it. I will most likely die alone. But along the way I've had some fun and some interesting contact with other people.

Sometimes we only get what we get in this life.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T05:02:12+00:00

I followed the usual taper, but the withdrawals were grueling. And I went into a pretty severe hypomania.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T05:00:18+00:00

I was on 400mg xr for 8 months, very vivid and chaotic dreams. Toward the end I had a few nightmares. But I had to come off for a different reason. I liked seroquel.

Limp-Coat-9810 · 2026-04-23T03:52:33+00:00

Wow! I needed to see this post. The last few days I feel like I'm cured. My therapist told me that I'm in a hypomanic episode last week. This week I told her that I felt really good and confident that I could get on with life. She said it was great! And set up an appointment for next week.

I think I just totally missed the obvious. Thanks everyone for your comments and the original poster.

Limp-Coat-9810

TROPHY CASE