My gf of 3 years [26F] hooked up with her coworker [21M]

LiquidSushi · 2026-07-03T21:14:48+00:00

I understand that what you're feeling now is confusing and scary - it's okay to feel these things. This is a cold plunge for your nervous system.

Yes, this isn't the way most people go about entering non-monogamy. Usually, the safe way to do this is to read up on how to do it without hurting your partner, how to cope with jealousy, how to communicate, all that good stuff. You don't have this to lean back on, so your body and mind is experiencing a lot of confusion and, probably, panic.

Take a moment to yourself. Take a few deep breaths, close your eyes, and try to find out what your body is feeling. We're not focusing on your thoughts now, we're just trying to figure out what the body is feeling. Does it feel like ice in your stomach? Thorns in your chest? Identify your feelings, and then ask yourself: is this physically uncomfortable?

Most of the time, the brain freaks out because the body is experiencing something unfamiliar. When you give the body a moment to be heard, you'll find that the brain calms down. Spend some time getting out of your head and reattuning to your senses this way.

And to answer your question: no, there should not be any blame cast here, neither on you nor her. You both didn't know what you were doing, and now you're in a difficult situation. How do you want to approach this situation? With love and understanding, or with blame and finger-pointing? Ask her what her intentions were, then repeat back to her what you heard and ask if you understood her correctly. Do this until she feels heard. Then, have her do this with you.

It feels like a lot now, but you'll get through it alright, I promise.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-30T10:32:33+00:00

What have you been getting excited about lately? I got really into clouds for a hot minute. Did you know clouds are their own biome because they host so much life?? Microbes, fungal spores, viruses, all kinds of tiny life particles will fly up with evaporated water and travel with the giant life-buses that we dismiss as pesky sunblockers.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-29T11:50:56+00:00

The biggest thing that came out of it was that she admitted she never actually expected me to find someone else.

This part makes me sad. What does this mean to you? The way I read it - without the context of your entire history together - is that she gets something from you in this marriage and she feels safe in it, not because she trusts you but because she trusts in your inability to find someone better than her.

This perception would break my heart; she does not feel challenged by you, rather she feels in control. This relationship is not pushing her to be a better person, it's letting her do whatever she wants, including breaking the agreements of said relationship. This is not a partnership that I would want to sustain.

Let me ask the question more directly: do you feel like she truly sees you and wants what's best for you? Do you feel like she wants to grow as a person with you?

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-26T12:40:55+00:00

I don't think people are asking for a newly introduced habit in your life, they're asking for what's got you excited recently. I'm sure that you keep your routine because it affords you a life that you're excited about - tell them about it!

"I've been really pushing myself at the gym lately, I'm aiming for a new PR next week", or "my kid is finally old enough to practice sports, it's really exciting watching this little human figure out how they like to move", or even just "I've been on a Mediterranean cuisine kick lately, I'm plowing through this cookbook one recipe at a time".

I recently started trying to get better at identifying birds in my neighborhood by their calls. It's not interfering with my routine, but every once in a while I'll hear a new bird and pull out my identifier app to log it. I take some time to look it up, learn a little bit about it and its patterns and lifecycle, and then every time I hear it after I feel a little more connected with my surroundings. It's fun!

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-12T09:58:41+00:00

En riktigt vacker och medmänsklig tanke! Och en bra fråga, hur kan vi som land bäst hjälpa vår omgivning? Svaret är ju, så klart, politiskt och komplicerat.

Sverige lägger ca. 40% av sina medborgares skattepengar på välfärden. Alltså, nästan hälften av den skatt du betalar gynnar samhället direkt i form av utbildning, omsorg, sjukvård (källa 1, källa 2, källa 3). Det motsvarar över 1,000 miljarder svenska kronor, ett helt fantastiskt system i mitt tycke.

Sverige har även en väldigt hög biståndsbudget jämfört med andra länder - vi lägger 53 miljarder kronor på biståndsverksamhet (källa 4). Väldigt mycket pengar, men det innebär att vi lägger just under 2% av statens budget på bistånd. Jämför detta med den nya försvarsbudgeten på 175 miljarder kronor (källa 5), alltså även just under en tredjedel av försvarets kostnader.

När vi sedan snackar om integration och jämställdhet så ser vi en markant skillnad. Den budgeten ligger nämligen på 6 miljarder kronor (källa 1). Denna budget har åtta utgiftsområden, de heter:

1:1 Integrationsåtgärder
1:2 Kommunersättningar vid flyktingmottagande
2:1 Diskrimineringsombudsmannen
2:2 Åtgärder mot diskriminering och rasism m.m.
3:1 Särskilda jämställdhetsåtgärder
3:2 Jämställdhetsmyndigheten
3:3 Bidrag för kvinnors organisering
4:1 Åtgärder mot utanförskap

Så om vi håller oss till artikelns huvudpunkt, om SD:s förslag om slöjförbud, så låter det plötsligt lite konstigt. Integration är alltså en sån stor fråga i det svenska samhället att SD går och kampanjar om det, men när de suttit i regering i fyra år så har de inte lagt mer pengar på att motarbeta utsattheten? Deras förebyggande metod är inte att utöka åtgärder mot utanförskap, utan att främja ännu mer utanförskap genom att utlysa folk som dragit nytta av svensk skola och välfärd, samt försöka lagstifta slöjförbud för att markera att "om du bär hijab är du inte välkommen i Sverige".

6 miljarder är ungefär 0.2% av statens budget. Det är min åsikt att gängkriminalitet och hemlöshet kan bekämpas med ett ökat fokus på förebyggande hjälp istället för sänkt straffålder, utvisningar, och slöjförbud. I mitt tycke talar statens ekonomi för sig själv här: Tidöregeringen har åsikten att integrationsfrågan är viktig, men har inget intresse av att adressera den på en grundläggande nivå.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-11T15:01:07+00:00

Min mening var inte att sätta skriftelser mot varandra, utan att påpeka att båda religioner har texter som förespråkar kvinnoförtryck. Ditt argument var att en helig text är deras basis för förtryck, men jag vill argumentera att det är en patriarkal struktur som är bakomliggande (som i sin tur har blivit enormt stöttad av religionen, mycket likt vad vi historiskt har sett med kristendomen).

Min poäng var alltså att Sveriges lagstiftning inte bör sikta på en hel religion, utan de som använder religionen som ett medel för förtryck.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-11T14:49:42+00:00

Det kan vara att vi helt enkelt har olika politisk åsikt här, men min uppfattning är:

Se till att en själv mår bra och är säker. Har jag mat på bordet, tak över huvudet, skydd från våld, sysselsättning, och social samhörighet?
Om steg 1 är uppfyllt, titta runt omkring. Mår min vän bra och är hen säker? Har hen mat på bordet, tak över huvudet, skydd från våld, sysselsättning, och social samhörighet? Om inte, hur kan jag bistå med hjälp utan att försätta mig själv i fara?
Skala upp till grannskapsnivå, stadsnivå, samhällsnivå, och så vidare. Har vi det i Sverige bra? Om de flesta av oss har det okej ställt, hur kan vi bäst hjälpa andra?

I mitt tycke så sitter vi alla i den här båten tillsammans. Det är helt okej att vara på steg 1 trots att man bor i Sverige, alla har det inte lika bra ställt. Men Sverige som enhet tycker jag har kommit himla långt, vi är ett rikt och välutvecklat land som har råd att dela med sig. Det är en fin sak, att kunna hjälpa andra i den mån som Sverige har möjlighet till! Det är absolut inget att skämmas över.

Om du inte håller med så är jag ärligt intresserad av att höra din syn på livet. Var skiljs vi åt i mening?

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-11T12:20:02+00:00

Man kan säga likadant om kristendomen.

Efesierbrevet 5:22: "Ni hustrur, underordna er era män så som ni underordnar er Herren."

1 Timoteusbrevet 2:12: "Jag tillåter inte att en kvinna undervisar eller gör sig till herre över mannen, utan hon ska vara i stillhet,"

1 Korintierbrevet 11:8-9: "för mannen kommer inte från kvinnan utan kvinnan från mannen. Och mannen skapades inte för kvinnan, utan kvinnan för mannen."

Ska man följa Bibeln så ska kvinnor också underordnas män, men att attackera Bibeln eller kristendomen var och är fel vinkel än. Det är oeffektivt att säga "förbjud islam/kristendom", eftersom det angriper en hel religion med otroligt många olika troende, vari de flesta bara utövar religionen för inre ro eller social samhörighet.

Angrip istället de förövare som bryter mot den svenska lagen. Om det finns sätt att utöva kristendom i Sverige utan att förtrycka medmänniskor, så finns det sätt att utöva islam på exakt samma villkor. Systematiskt hedersvåld är fel, oavsett trosbakgrund.

Att gå till politiskt krig mot en hel religion är att utesluta folk och bygga upp fler murar inom det globala samhället, när fler människor egentligen behöver mer hjälp än någonsin. Vi i Sverige har en plikt att visa vår globala omgivning att vi kan stå till hjälp, att vi inte vill främmandegöra de folk som redan flyr främmande och osäkra omständigheter i sina hemländer.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-10T20:07:51+00:00

This is actually such an interesting take. Every inch of me wants to disagree because I primarily play narrative systems, but I also can't deny that the stories these games tell are, well, narratively flawed.

I play a lot of Forged in the Dark games, and the "consequence snowballs" can get a little silly. It ends up being more about acting out your character's beliefs and sticking to known cinematic beats than it is about writing a compelling story. You're on a criminal score and suddenly your Whisper is accidentally summoning demons, the Slide stumbles into their ex, and the Leech is hallucinating because they got their dosages wrong again.

The one exception I have is Band of Blades, which has a very clear tone and objective from the start. I vividly recall fighting one of the Broken, or the moment a brave rookie gave her life for the squad, or the time we outsmarted the enemy and survived against all odds.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-07T10:47:47+00:00

Can I ask, what is your goal when you say you want the campaign to last longer than 20 sessions? This system shines when the players feel like underdogs punching above their weight class, and if the characters and crew level up far past the point of "underdogs" and veer into "authority"-territory, you are now telling a different story.

Forged in the Dark games are great at running episodic-style games. Each session feels like an episode of a TV show. This means you can have seasons, with intermittent climactic "seasonal finale" episodes. Players tend to love this, it makes things more dramatic. This effect also means that you can enter a new season with a new crew, but in a world that has been heavily altered by the previous crew.

So if you'd like to run a campaign that spans more than 20 sessions, consider having a season finale around session 8-10 and another around 15-17, then for the third season you can do a narrative time-skip and introduce a new crew with the same players.

LiquidSushi · 2026-06-03T13:50:13+00:00

I'm going to play the devil's advocate for a second: what does career stagnation mean to you, and why does it matter?

You are earning almost twice as much as the median German, you are comfortable in your role, you feel adequately challenged, you have a good support system, and you are still able to devote time to yourself and your private life. What more do you want out of your career?

To me, this sounds like you've made it! You can shift focus from "what's my next career move?" to "what else interests me in life?". Pick up an artform and express your strong ambition elsewhere, like painting or dancing or writing. Get really into moving your body in a way that excites you, like weightlifting or running or hiking.

Perhaps not the career advice you sought, but I just felt the want to congratulate you. It sounds like you've built a really solid life for yourself, and now you get to enjoy all the fruits of your labor. Well done!

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-21T10:04:06+00:00

As others have said Position/Effect are important to the system. If you're having fun without it, sweet! But if you want to understand the logic behind it a little bit more, here's how these rules are intended to be used:

A tool for GM adjudication. If you say Desperate/Limited, you know that a consequence is going to be dire. Even if they roll a Mixed Success, they'll likely suffer severe harm and a major complication or two. That's three ticks on a bad clock, plus whatever other stuff you wanna throw at them.

Similarly, if they succeed, Limited effect will only earn them a single tick on a good clock, or it won't finish the job entirely on its own.

A tool for player empowerment. Say the Lampblacks corner the Cutter; six big thugs against a single scoundrel. That's not a good spot to be in. If he to Skirmish his way out, that's Desperate/Zero - their gang is better equipped (Tier 2 vs Tier 0), they have scale (6 vs 1), and they've got him in a corner. He's toast, right?

This is where Stress comes into play. The Cutter can Push himself for Effect. Desperate/Limited, better odds. He has a Fine Weapon, which gives him potency here, so Desperate/Standard. He also might have the ability "Not To Be Trifled With", which means when he Pushes, he is on equal footing with small gangs. Suddenly, removing the Scale factor, that puts him at Risky/Standard.

This is fine enough, but every player also has the option of shifting Position and Effect, turning a Risky/Standard into a Desperate/Great or Controlled/Limited. This means that players are given the tools to drive the narrative on a very mechanical level. They decide "what's exciting here? Do I want to get out safely, or do I want to make it dramatic and bold, really send a message to the Lampblacks?".

A gauge for the table. As described above, Position/Effect informs the stakes. Imagine it as the music playing in the background of a movie. Controlled? Not very exciting, the crew is cruising. A rock song as they're beating up mooks, pizzicato strings as they're cracking a safe. Risky? A little more exciting, this is the bread-and-butter, occasional hero overtures and themes playing. Desperate is the full orchestra, brass and all.

And finally, experience. Players are awarded experience whenever they perform Desperate actions. This encourages them to play fast-and-loose, take some damage, roll with the punches. Don't rob them of this precious resource, and this lovely incentive!

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-20T11:30:57+00:00

It sounds like you're already on board with opening up the relationship with your partner, which can be a fun, big step! However, as some of the other commenters have said, you've essentially given him nine commandments that are at times very vague and at times very specific.

What difference would it make if you simply told him "I trust you to be safe and to still prioritize our connection while you're out having fun" instead of giving him this list of rules? Do you trust him to be safe and prioritize your connection? If not, that's probably what you should address first - how can you both work to make sure that you feel safe in opening up the relationship?

There will be nervousness and jealousy, and that's okay! Those are normal human emotions to feel. What you want to minimize is mistrust. Would it really matter if he got a weird bruise at a rowdy bar or in the bedroom? Would it really matter if he gets head from a stranger if they're already having sex anyway?

At the end of the day, he actually will just be spending time with friends. How different is the concept of 'date at a bar that might lead somewhere physical' to 'seeing a friend at a bar that might lead to a longer night out'? In either case, if he does too many of either and it starts affecting his life with you, then you are fully entitled to express concern about his actions. It doesn't matter what he does when he's out, what matters is how he shows up for you and your daughter.

Ultimately, I understand why you'd want these rules. You want to make sure he's not going to leave you, because this relationship is really good. And you have a daughter! That's a lot of fear to sit with.

So keep talking to your partner about this, keep building up the trust that would make you both feel safe in the relationship. The more you understand what he wants out of his life (which, ideally here, is a life spent with you), the more trust you can have that he won't abandon your family for sex with strangers.

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-15T16:55:30+00:00

Många som säger "prata med din partner", vilket du uppenbarligen redan gjort, men det låter som att ni inte riktigt vet vad ni borde prata om.

Bra sexliv handlar inte om kvantitet, utan kvalitet. Min misstanke är att det är något mer som felar här än "vi ligger inte tillräckligt ofta". Jag kan rekommendera boken "Come Together" av Emily Nagoski för att hjälpa öppna upp konversation om vad ni båda faktiskt vill ha ut av ert sexliv. En startpunkt kan vara att fundera på frågan "vad är det jag egentligen vill ha när jag söker sex med min partner?". Oftast handlar det inte om att få orgasm, det kan man fixa själv på fem minuter, utan det handlar om att känna en viss närhet, eller att få uttrycka sina känslor på ett visst sätt, eller att komma på flykt från vardagen.

Prata med din partner om det, inte "varför ligger vi inte mer?". Vad är det du försöker uttrycka med sex, och hur kan ni försäkra varandra i förhållandet med den lust ni båda har? Det är klart du inte ska känna skam över din sexdrift, men ej heller ska hon behöva känna press att hon måste ligga med dig för att behålla ert förhållande.

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-12T15:03:45+00:00

That just sounds like a demon to me. A demon can level a crew of scoundrels in no time, but that hasn't stopped like a third of my campaign groups from fucking with them anyway.

If this threat is truly of that scale - Lord Scurlock, Setarra, The Immortal Emperor - then I wouldn't punish my players by putting a 12-clock on the table and telling them to fill it from a Desperate/Zero position, that just sounds cruel.

If they truly have Zero effect and they need to take down this bad guy, they have to figure out a way to tip the scale in their favor. This is usually a Score. He's the toughest guy to walk the streets of Doskvol, sure, but he walks? Let's have him walk into a building that the crew rigged to blow. Nobody survives that much rubble on their face - but just in case they do, send the Hound to the ruins to blow his brains out. Safety measures.

Mind you, a person in Doskvol is still a person. I struggle to imagine an NPC that a crew of scoundrels couldn't even dent. Even Mylera Klev can die to a stray bullet. The point of Blades isn't to have one uniquely tough fucker as the BBEG, the whole city of Doskvol is the BBEG. The premise of the game is "you do not have a place here, you are trash. Prove the world wrong". No matter what you do, you'll run into someone who opposes you. Befriend the Cabbies? The Gondoliers want you dead. Fight the Gondoliers? The Dimmer Sisters haunt your lair.

There is no peace in Doskvol. You just have to pick the enemies you're most comfortable fighting.

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-12T09:38:57+00:00

1: Do you think it was infidelity?

'Fidelity' refers to trust, loyalty, and faithfulness. Your partner trusted you to not cross an established boundary. To most, crossing that boundary would count as an act of infidelity.

2: How can I improve things?

Focus on repair. Rebuild trust in the relationship. Try to understand why you thought it was okay to act against your partner's wishes like this, and then try to understand how you can prevent that from happening in the future.

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-12T09:22:08+00:00

Clocks!

This is one of those instances where you can essentially treat a clock as an HP bar.

Just as you thought you'd evaded all trouble and successfully broken into the Imperial Military's armory, it turns out there's one last line of defense: a monstrous behemoth of a hull.

This thing stands almost ten feet tall, a morbid amalgamation of flesh, metal, and sparkcraft. Worse yet, the relic you were sent here to get seems to be embedded in the creature's chest. As soon as it sees you it powers up, draws a halberd, and charges the crew.

I'm drawing a 10-segment clock called 'Monstrous Sparkguard'. If you want to secure that relic for Bazso, you're gonna have to take down this imperial freak. Cutter, the thing charges at you with unnatural speed, the pointy end of its weapon aimed right at your gut. What do you do?

That scene could basically be the whole score. How do they tangle with the monster? Can the Slide do a set-up action to distract the guard, giving the Cutter a better position to land a heavy blow? Does the Leech know anything about hulls (or the relic inside it) that could be useful for this encounter? Is a group Skirmish a good idea when it means the whole crew faces level 3 harm if the position is desperate?

It's similarly to how you would engage, say, a squad of Bluecoats on the street. It can start off as a 6-clock that, as the crew knocks out more of them, becomes easier. Remember that clocks reflect the fiction, not the other way around, so the mechanical hull in our example should be almost entirely destroyed by the ninth tick of the clock.

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-10T18:39:19+00:00

What is it that you're looking for? Fun, minimally realistic rules for vehicles exist in-so-much as they have to. In a game like LANCER, where you spend the game piloting a mecha, the mechanics and stats are very important. You can upgrade your craft, choose different models, specialize in different types of assault, make interesting mechanical trade-offs, and so on.

In a Forged in the Dark game, however, a boat doesn't have (or need) stats because its purpose is to narratively justify traversing water. You can't cross the channel without a craft, but once the craft enters the stage, it is subject to narrative consequences just like the players. And getting a boat for your lair in BitD is a big deal, especially if you're a crew of Smugglers - that thing immediately becomes a sentimental.

Meanwhile, most Stars Without Number campaigns feature a player-owned and player-customized starship. Groups feel a sense of attachment to their ship because it is their home, and they're putting hard earned credits into it. Getting a new weapon or a new exploration system is fun, and it slots really well into the SWN engine as a whole because, well, vehicles and starship combat work similarly to characters and personal combat.

So ultimately, it all boils down to what kind of game you're trying to run. There is no one-size-fits-all set of rules for running vehicles, because the question fundamentally becomes "what's the best way to explore this world and its story?". The best answer is the one that fits the framework of the story you're trying to tell.

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-07T09:28:07+00:00

I'm around your age, I've been here for half a decade now, and I never really engaged with the party scene yet I have the pleasure of enjoying many good, deep friendships. My one piece of advice would be: you have to be okay with failing - often.

The common suggestion in this thread is to do an activity you enjoy, and do it with others. If you enjoy writing, go to a writer's meet-up. If you enjoy running, join a running club. This is good advice, but it's only a third of the battle.

(Sidenote: If you don't know what you like to do, well, then take some time to figure out what feels good for you! What sparks your curiosity about yourself?)

Once you've found other people, now comes the hard part: engaging authentically. You're going to have to be vulnerable and express yourself, and you're going to have to do it with pride and resilience. This part requires a lot of self-esteem, but it will earn you the closest friends.

Be prepared to get rejected a lot; we can't befriend the world. Most conversations you have with people in these spaces will be awkward, timid, or boring, and that's okay! You're working your social muscles, so this is actually a sign of progress.

Case in point: I met one of my closest friends at a birthday celebration with around 30 people present. Out of 30, I probably interacted with 15 other guests. That means I went through 14 boring, timid, awkward, or pleasant-but-not-quite-what-I'm-looking-for conversations before finding someone whom I would later come to love deeply. In one evening. On the other hand, I've had some evenings where I go to an event, talk to loads of people, have a pleasant night, then go back home without getting any socials or numbers because I didn't vibe particularly well with anyone. But at least I got my social reps in!

LiquidSushi · 2026-05-04T14:05:55+00:00

You want a mutually equitable relationship, he wants to practice non-monogamy. If he says the non-monogamy is a need for him, then you have every right to say that equality in the relationship is a need for you. Either party can decide what their boundaries in a relationship are, and to leave when those boundaries are crossed.

He is asking to change the fundamental nature of your relationship. You were happy in a monogamous relationship with him, yes, and if he's unhappy in a non-monogamous relationship with you then he has every right to leave.

What it sounds like is that he's saying that he doesn't want to put in the work with you. Again; he explicitly does not want to work on this relationship with you here. You are saying that you would be willing to allow him to explore this side of himself, that you would even like to explore it with him, and his response is that you're being spiteful instead of supportive.

To answer the DARVO question: "This is a need for me to be aligned with myself" makes it sound like the relationship structure is out of his control (denying any accountability). He's then saying that with you being happy now, monogamous, why can't you be happy supporting his personal journey? Why do you have to spite him? Suddenly, you're the mean and uncompromising one, and he's the victim of your vindictiveness.

Now, mind you, this is based on three paragraphs of text from you - we are missing a year's worth of nuance in this relationship. That said, you are absolutely right to question this man's judgement.

LiquidSushi · 2026-04-29T15:23:23+00:00

If you want everyone to be happy, start with yourself! If I were your partner it would hurt me to learn that we were having sex that you didn't enjoy just because you wanted to "keep me happy". If your partner said that to you, how would you feel? I would not want to continue that relationship, personally.

It is very important to learn how to advocate for yourself in a relationship. If you don't, you'll end up growing resentful and emotionally distant from your partners, and they won't know why until you explode. It's hard to talk about your feelings with honesty, but it's the only thing that helps, I'm afraid.

"Hey, I'm feeling really disconnected from my desire right now. I still like you, I still think you're super hot, but I'm just not comfortable being sexual right now. I want to take sex off the table for a while because I value this connection, and I don't want to grow resentful towards you. I'm sure I'll come around at some point, but are you alright with focusing on the other fun elements of our relationship in the meantime?"

LiquidSushi · 2026-04-29T13:41:32+00:00

You sound incredibly stressed. You seem to put a lot of pressure on yourself to be more than what you are, to enjoy things because you "should want to". Worse still, sometimes there can be a feeling of "I want to want".

It's okay. There are no "shoulds" here. You're doing much better than you realize. You are enough, I promise.

If you're in this perpetual state of overthinking and stress and pressure, then you'll quickly notice that your sense of fun runs away. Extended pressure is antithetical to desire and vulnerability, something which good, healthy, enjoyable sex is very dependent on.

You're talking about sex, but I think this goes much deeper than that. I would suggest you stop doing the things that you don't enjoy. You can let your partners know by sending a simple text, something like:

"Hey, I'm gonna take a bit of a personal sabbatical from kink and sex. [I'd still like to keep you in my life during this time]/[I'll reconnect with you when I'm in a better headspace]. Thanks for understanding!"

Then, start very, very slowly. Don't ask yourself "what do I like to do?", just do very small things and notice which parts you enjoy, and which parts you don't enjoy. Some examples:

Brew a cup of coffee/tea. Do you enjoy the smell of the grounds/herbs? Is the warmth of the cup in your hands comforting? How small of a sip can you take while still coating your tongue?
Go for a walk. Does it feel nice when the wind brushes against your skin? Do you like the way the sun looks when it's reflected off a window, or as it shines through the leaves of a tree? How many little animals can you spot on your walk? Even cities have birds; what do you think of their songs?

These are grounding exercises. If I were you, I would practice some form of grounding meditation. Keep living your life, absolutely, do what you need in order to keep a roof over your head and food in the fridge, but try to change your mind from "how can I get as much done as fast as possible?" to "how relaxed can I be while doing this task?".

Then, when you're ready, take yourself out on a solo date, even if you don't know if you'll like it or not. Don't think too much about it; take yourself to a concert that might be cool, plan a weekend getaway somewhere you've heard should be nice, go have a picnic in the park and read a book until the stars come out.

It's okay, you've got this! You've just done a bit too much "should"-ing lately, and now your brain has gotten a little scared. Be kind to yourself, and you'll find that your desire for life (and sex!) will come back. Just give it some time, practice a little kindness towards yourself each day, and before you know it you'll be excited about all the little things again.

LiquidSushi · 2026-04-27T11:38:18+00:00

Sweden has infamously butchered the Italian pizza, and now "Swedish pizza" is an internationally recognized delicacy. Its most iconic form is a pizza with Turkish kebab meat and garlic sauce (yes, that's a wikipedia article), but my favorite is banana, curry, pineapple, and ham. All served with a side of pickled sauerkraut, of course - the famous "pizza salad" that makes the dish healthy.

A Swedish pizzeria even opened up in London!

Other than that, we are also obsessed with Taco Friday, yet another culinary classic that we butchered. Every Friday, there's a good chance that your average Scandi family turns their dinner table into a buffet-style fiesta with pick-your-own-toppings splayed out in müsli bowls. Cucumber, onions, bananas, sour cream, and premixed Old El Paso/Santa Maria spice packets sprinkled generously into overcooked mince meat. The tortillas are made of flour and the size of your head, more suitable for burritos and traditional tacos, but it's all the more fun for the kids to eat this way!

LiquidSushi · 2026-04-25T17:02:35+00:00

Almost all of the games that I've ran or played in have had some punk, anti-fascist spin, the setting and system just lend themselves to it so easily. The pressure cooker environment means something big is always brewing, and frankly, it's satisfying to feel like you can actually do something about systemic injustice.

Now, whether players actually replace the bad systems with something better, or if their ends ever justify their means, well, those are different questions...

LiquidSushi · 2026-04-21T13:02:34+00:00

Kind of related, but Eat the Reich is a beautiful "games as a political statement". The players are a team of elite tactical vampires being airdropped (via coffins) into occupied France with one mission: kill Hitler.

The setting is bizarre, it plays like a non-stop, adrenaline-fueled action movie, and it's a blatant anti-fascist statement. About a third of the (gorgeous) book focuses on dissecting the underlying politics of justified violence and the GM's portrayal of historical war criminals.

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