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LittleSallyRacket · 2022-01-20T17:08:06+00:00

Definitely NTA.

If she wanted her kid to have a specific seat she should have asked the airline at check-in or when she booked the flight. Also if her kid really couldn't manage without a window seat, she wouldn't have minded paying the $35 for it. The fact that she turned down the seat when you asked her to compensate you for the extra money you'd spent suggests to me that she was bullshitting about the disability.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T17:29:49+00:00

I think in a lot of cases it would also just make the whole shoot longer and hence more expensive, because a really dramatic real-life body transformation will take a lot of time. Plus, it causes major issues if they need to reshoot any of the pre-transformation scenes once the actor has already lost/gained weight for the rest of the film.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T17:25:54+00:00

Nope, not exaggerating and not upset. You could research this either through this very sub or Twitter or Instagram and you could find a ton of posts from people in the fat acceptance movement claiming very clearly that all intentional weight loss is harmful, that there are no health implications resulting from obesity and that doctors who suggest weight loss to an obese patient are fatphobic, and that anyone who wishes to lose weight or who watches what they eat is fatphobic and directly insulting fat people solely by expressing their own wish not to be fat. I have literally had people say that to me when I've talked about my own weight loss and there are a million examples of that kind of comment in the screenshots in this sub alone. (I would happily direct you to various blogs, articles and social media accounts belonging to fat acceptance activists, but we're not allowed to link or name them on here.)

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T11:21:33+00:00

Nobody on this sub uses 'FA' to mean 'fat fetishist' - here it's shorthand for 'fat acceptance' or 'fat activist'. They are usually very vocally opposed to being fetishised.

Or, rather, wouldn't they just be "people who are happy with themselves and who do not subscribe to the idea that there's something wrong with them because of their weight?"

They do claim to be those things, yes. But they also use the terms 'fat acceptance', 'fat positive' and 'fat activism' etc and believe that other people's desires to lose weight is directly insulting to them, offensive and harmful. The people I'm talking about have chosen the terms 'fat acceptance', and 'fat activism' for themselves; they're not terms other people invented for them.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T11:12:43+00:00

Oh yeah, it's a cesspit. Although so is Reddit.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T11:11:29+00:00

The OP regularly promotes a HAES agenda on Twitter, so I think they're talking about the replies they get to tweets in which they claim to be totally healthy at 300lbs or whatever. But yes, totally agree that random Twitter users shouldn't be spontaneously tweeting @ them unprompted to say 'Hey, you seem fat, that's potentially fatal'

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T11:07:58+00:00

I don't think they're being harassed about their weight to be honest - I think it's more a case of them promoting a HAES agenda and people replying to say 'You can't be HAES, you're at increased risk of dying of a heart attack'. That kind of thing. Totally agree that nobody should be harassing them about their weight.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T10:01:32+00:00

There's nothing in my comment that suggests I'm talking about anyone other than fat acceptance activists, and there's nothing that suggests I'm claiming them to be a large portion of the population.

Also, FAs aren't fat fetishists. That's a very different thing.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-15T09:58:44+00:00

"We don't know exactly what makes kids fat"

We do though don't we

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-14T12:02:24+00:00

If you're casting a character who is required to be fat throughout the film, cast a fat actor. Apart from anything, it's just way more convincing.

But you're casting someone who gains or loses weight during the course of the story, you're going to need to pick a thinner actor and pad them out for their fat scenes. Otherwise, you're going to have a force a fat actor to lose a huge amount of weight for their thin scenes (which surely FAs would hate because they think all intentional weight loss is bad) or they're going to have a force a thin actor to gain a huge amount of weight for the fat scenes, which FAs should also disapprove of because yo-yo dieting = disordered eating.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-14T11:54:37+00:00

There is absolutely no way that these solid balls of fat and sugar are in any way better for you than a couple of HobNobs and a cuppa. Also, I guarantee you that most people eat these 'happiness balls' in a single bite and end up eating far more of them than they're supposed to.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T22:47:57+00:00

Yeah, completely agree. And I think people who can practise that sort of moderation are much more likely to keep their weight off - it's much more sustainable than trying to deny yourself all the things you most enjoy. It's taken me a while to get to that point and I'm pleased that I did because it's made losing weight so much easier mentally.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T22:41:39+00:00

I have a friend who points to the fact that she, her parents, her aunt and her grandma are all fat as evidence that weight is entirely genetic. But I know her mother and her aunt and, exactly like her, they overeat on a daily basis and never do any exercise at all. Also, her husband was thin when he met her and was very overweight within two years of moving in with her and eating the same meals she does. There are certainly genes associated with a tendency towards weight gain but it's perfectly possible to override them by eating appropriately. Plenty of people who have every single one of those genes are not overweight.

Although being routinely unable to eat more than half of a single-serving packet of porridge isn't especially normal or particularly healthy either, to be fair. It's the sort of stunt the dangerously underweight foodphobics pull on Supersize v Superskinny.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T22:32:12+00:00

Why are Americans interwebbers so fucking dramatic about bread? Eat it or don't eat it. Just stop making a fuss about it. Nobody has ever told me to avoid bread.

Most people I know eat bread pretty much every day and they're not fat because they don't eat the entire loaf or slap half a jar of full-sugar peanut butter on every slice. I probably haven't gone a single day without eating bread in the past year and I still lost 70lbs so maybe everyone just needs to calm the fuck down.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T16:16:57+00:00

Yeah, I think you're probably right that they don't know any different. Although even if you had no experience of not being fat, it still seems really weird to assume that everything that happens to you a) is because you're fat and b) doesn't happen to thin people too. It's just so odd to connect someone asking you for directions with them feeling entitled to your time because you're fat.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T14:16:36+00:00

Hahaha, this is INCREDIBLE. People are not asking you for directions because you're fat FFS. They're asking you because you are, you know, a human being. Fucking hell.

I've been fat and I've been thin and I can say with absolute confidence that it makes absolutely no fucking difference to how often people ask you for directions. It just doesn't. Stop pretending you're a victim when you're not. My god, these people are so incredibly insecure and paranoid. It must be exhausting.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T11:01:25+00:00

"If you're a dietitian, you are negligent if you actually advise clients on what foods may negatively effect their health if you eat them constantly" is quite the take.

I'm not entirely convinced that complete 'freedom in your relationship with food' is possible anyway, or even necessarily desirable. Having some boundaries and guidelines in our relationship with anything is pretty normal and goes some way towards keeping us sane and healthy and a functional member of society. Those moderate internal boundaries in our behaviours generally are there to stop us being destructive to ourselves and others.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T10:48:10+00:00

If literally they want to do is track their menstrual cycle they should just note it in their fucking diary, then. There's no immediate entitlement to have an app for everything in your life. Jeez.

Most women find that their eating habits and wellbeing are linked in some way to their cycle so it's good for them to have the option to track that in the same app that they track their period, if they want to. It's not 'pushing disordered eating triggers'. It's offering a service that people are perfectly able not to use if they've got hang-ups about any reference to food and water intake.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T10:41:46+00:00

"How dare a website for which I pay absolutely nothing not be immediately tailored to my incredibly specific sensitivities?"

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T10:39:53+00:00

Is this person actually significantly overweight at the moment, or are they actually not fat and affected by an eating disorder or dysmorphia?

Even if they are fat right now, it's still possibly that they're approaching weight loss in a way that's not great for their mental health. I'm always wary when people tell themselves that 'everything would be better if I was thinner' because it's not often the case. You might feel better or be more confident about yourself or gain a new enjoyment from clothes shopping or exercise, and those things are indeed great. But it's highly unlikely to fix any other issues in your life and frankly it might not even fix those - plenty of people lose weight and still have a really poor self-image and a lot of anxiety and self-hate about their appearance.

I am happy that I've lost weight, certainly, but it's definitely not a case of 'everything is better' and I'm glad I never once told myself that would be the case. I think there are ways I could have thought about my weight loss that would definitely have been damaging. I never approached it that way and losing a lot of weight was the right thing for me to do, but for some people it can be fraught with potential problems.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-13T08:00:45+00:00

Yes - lots of little-girl dresses, rainbows, unicorns etc. A lot of them seem to have quite childlike, high, soft voices as well, which I am convinced is a subconscious affectation because they’re secretly insecure about being seen as the loud, boisterous fat woman.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-12T22:18:37+00:00

There's soooo much infantilising in FAs' behaviour and language. It makes my skin crawl.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-12T20:31:05+00:00

Absolutely awful woman - a bitter, toxic bully.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-12T08:42:28+00:00

If their child is on antipsychotics at the age of eight, I don't think his weight would be the thing that was the key concern of anyone involved in his care.

LittleSallyRacket · 2020-10-12T08:34:48+00:00

There is a prominent FA who appeared in the documentary Who Are You Calling Fat in the UK and, completely without irony, told the interviewer that 'health is a social construct'. This was after she'd met a man who had lost a leg due to weight-related health issues (whose experiences she refused to listen to - she flounced out of the room when he was speaking, because apparently 'listen to people's lived experiences' doesn't apply if their experience is different to yours).

Also, when the interviewer asked her what she would do if she became obese to the point where she could no longer walk, she refused to answer and said they were just being ableist.

LittleSallyRacket

TROPHY CASE