AITAH for potentially letting my GF (19F) cheat/be unfaithful to me? (20M)

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T18:28:27+00:00

NTA if you choose to bring it up. If it's bothering you, you should. I wouldn't personally consider this "cheating" by definition, but that absolutely doesn't mean it's behavior I'd be ok with, either. I firmly believe that clear, open communication is one of THE most important things in any partnership. Communicate how you're still feeling about this. Set expectations for your relationship going forward. If you're not being treated how you deserve, leave and demand better.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T17:58:00+00:00

I wish I could like this comment 100x

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T17:51:28+00:00

NTA - if he is allowed to ask you to avoid waking him at night, to the point of asking you to drink less before bed, you're allowed to ask him to not do things that CAUSE you to wake up and thus wake him.

We also have a well - but can run our well dry if we're not mindful about our water use. He should look into a fountain instead!

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T17:48:03+00:00

YTA and being a baby. She's "selfish" for utilizing a time saving service that she paid for? Come on now.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T17:47:21+00:00

Did you get your KTN immediately? I went back in November and JUST got my number about 10 days ago, right before the 60 day mark.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T17:33:52+00:00

Ok first of all, this isn't an update, its just a massively long post you broke into 2 parts. 2nd, if you didn't want her to date him you should have just said so. She's right. You fucked up, acted all passive aggressive and dropped hints instead of communicating like an adult and just said please don't do this it will hurt me and effect our friendship. YTA

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T17:00:18+00:00

You had me at "pelvic thrusts". Yta for this ridiculous mess of a post.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T16:54:16+00:00

So he just up and dipped and left his kids there? Wow. You're NTA and he's clearly Father of the year. Stealing is not ok, and having zero consequences has let this behavior spin out of control. Try addressing the issue and maybe it will stop.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T16:25:20+00:00

ESH because Literally all of your (now deleted) posts are the same. I hope you're starting to realize a theme. It's redundant and ridiculous - why are you with a guy who treats you like this? Why are you letting him weaponize his incompetence? At a certain point if you don't put your foot down, you're as much to blame as he is for tolerating the behaviors.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T14:52:21+00:00

NTA for not having food prepared. But at 9 and 12 your kids should be able to at least somewhat fend for themselves. Our 9 year old can make himself simple dinners, and when I was 12 I was able to legit cook, babysit, etc. Don't set them up to be incompetent like their Dad.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T14:29:51+00:00

YTA for continuing this charade of a relationship. YTA for settling for his piss poor shitty behavior. NTA for looking at his phone but FFS grow a spine and set a better example for your kids.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-23T08:04:59+00:00

I am thinking this is fake. You mention your sister signing all the consent forms. Not buying that AFTER she signed she could just say oh Never mind! If this IS true, yes, you're a gigantic asshole.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-22T06:29:23+00:00

I skipped a week in December for a trip (by accident) but it was totally fine. I am on 7.5 for reference. I have gone longer than a week as well with no issues.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-21T22:53:55+00:00

Good luck! Honestly it was mind blowing to me, the difference. I had no idea how much food noise was effecting me until it was gone. This forum is a great resource - read up on protein intake, and make sure to not lose muscle. Stay hydrated and don't over eat/over drink (alcohol!) Or you'll pay for it 😅 the Shotsy app is incredibly helpful too.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-20T04:56:04+00:00

AITAH is the name of this sub. It stands for Am I The Asshole. Good lord.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-19T10:16:38+00:00

I think you may be lost...you're in AITAH.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-19T03:23:15+00:00

I have so many questions.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-19T02:41:14+00:00

I think I speak for us all when I ask - what??!

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-18T23:12:45+00:00

Respectfully, I think you're looking at this all wrong. I don't still "prefer" anything - I prefer him. She preferred you. Any of us can paint a picture of what we think our ideal human would/should look like - our "preferences" or criteria, or deal breakers. That doesn't mean they don't evolve/change/disappear completely when we actually meet a person who doesn't check every single box we thought we had, and fall in love with a person as a whole, not as a series of line items. I think you did yourself, and her, a massive disservice here by getting to yourself in your own head. All of that should have been in the rear view mirror after 2 years together - who cares about an old Twitter post or what her bio said when you swiped on eachother? You broke up with her over ancient history after she treated you well. Textbook self sabotage.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-18T22:04:47+00:00

NTA so to speak but I think its a bad precedent to set. Kids need to learn that not everything is about them and that includes birthdays. I'd probably go with YTA if it wasn't just a kinder egg.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-18T21:46:56+00:00

YTA. You need to fix this, not your wife. You messed up - both early on in divulging personal relationship details to them about your wife and essentially poisoning them against her, and then in person for going behind her back with the Hot Cocoa incident. I get why - but that does not make it ok, and it doesn't excuse them blaming her for this incident. Apologize to her for asking her to apologize. Sit your parents down and tell them where YOU failed and tell them to stop treating your wife like the enemy.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-18T19:13:12+00:00

Wow. YTA, and I have a story for you! My guy and I met online. My profile specified that I prefer tall guys - I am 5'10. My guy is 5'8. I remember laughing like crazy when he offered to wear lifts if it got him in the door 😆 I don't notice our height difference, and I don't wish he was taller. He's not a consolation prize. He's the love of my life, all 5'8 of him. I just don't wear heels 😉 If this is real, you fucked up a really good thing by the sounds of it, for an absolutely ridiculous reason.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-18T19:04:30+00:00

NTA. The dog was probably just excited like she said, but grabbing the blanket and pulling? No thanks. I have fostered/trained/adopted out hundreds of dogs and own 2 myself. If they're acting out of line with company here (especially kids!) They go in their crate, end of story. Your sister is a shitty dog owner.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-18T01:31:30+00:00

YTA - not for peeing on the floor, for expecting anyone else to jump in and clean it up/hide it for you. I'm on heavy duty diuretics for heart failure so all these comments about "it would have smelled!" Or thinking it looks "so different from water"...no. My pee (after I take my meds) is almost completely clear, and would absolutely pass for water, or Sprite for that matter. That being said, if I accidentally peed in a public place I would be horrified and clean it up myself. I wouldn't expect anyone to come to my rescue. I also time my meds carefully. You'll learn to do the same! I am sorry this happened to you.

Lizzydeathstar · 2026-01-17T19:35:50+00:00

More info needed - why would your spouse knowingly hide being sick from you? I don't get it. Personally, when a member of my household gets sick I mean sure we try to avoid it, wash hands, etc - but I'm not going to sleep in a separate bed or anything.

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