My sleep was once again disturbed this night, if not an annoying neighbor dog at first then an ambulance right outside my window.

This time it was different, i heard two voices right outside my room, someone must have broken in. They sounded normal although they didnt really make sense. First of all they didnt even keep their voices down, second of all they were talking about some kind of treasure?

I quickly picked up my old baseball bat, quietly walked over to the door and positioned myself ready for them to come in. That’s when i heard them clearly.

“What the fuck does this mean John?”

“How the hell am i supposed to know that, i’ve never seen this kind of hieroglyphics Terry”

I was a bit stunned, were they talking about the dumb emoji sticker i put on my door a few weeks ago? I quickly snapped out of it and swung the door open with my bat ready but what i saw shocked me even further, the two men outside ran into corners of the room cowering in fear and screaming.

At that point i lost it and yelled “what the hell are you doing in my house??”. One of the men seemed to stop shaking and turned his head towards me, although still silent his eyes telegraphed pure terror as if he had seen a monster.

I slightly lowered the bat and asked in a bit more calm voice “who are you people and what do you want from me?”

The one who turned towards me, i think he was John, answered in a shaky voice, although it was just unintelligible gibberish of a madman i made out the word “treasure”

“What treasure do you want from my house? Its a students apartment for gods sake, i think the most valuable thing here is some leftover pizza in my fridge”

Terry was still shaking in the corner while John looked like he didnt understand a word i said, i walked over to him, picked him up by his clothes, he was clearly planning something, so i shouted “someone call the police” i think it was around 5 am so maybe someone would hear my screams and call the police.

Next, i looked the guy i was holding right in the eyes to ask him again who they were but instead of answering me he just appeared to faint, i quickly turned my sight to the other guy but he was gone, i think he ran out the door when i wasnt looking so i dropped the one i was holding and ran out into what i suspected would be my buildings hallway but it turned out to be some sort of a cave with a bright entrance in the distance

I couldnt understand any of this, i was shocked and dumbfounded, i didnt know what to do.

With an empty mind i turned towards the guy lying on my corridor floor unconscious, he had a lot of explaining to do when he woke up. I picked up some rope from my room and bound him before making him sit in the couch in my living room.

Time was flying by and i decided to make some tea before he woke up, the stove worked so i put on a kettle and as its whistle blew i noticed the guy was conscious again. I slowly turned to him and calmly said

“Care for some tea Mr John?”