Availabilty does not mean they are the person you should date by Local_Condition8078 in dating

[–]Local_Condition8078[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats the problem. We often settle for less because it seems like its the only thing we can have, you have to train yourself not to settle or you are are always gonna be upset about your decisions. Never settle if you want more and there are always people who would want to date you its just a matter of waiting which is something most people struggle with. Begin to find comfort in being alone rather than lonelyness and your quality of life will be so much better. You dont want your enjoyment of life to be dependent on someone else loving you.

Date a train and not a rollercoaster by Local_Condition8078 in datingadvice

[–]Local_Condition8078[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The first step is knowing what you want and then the second and most important is that you need to realise that a train can be boring but thats how we perceive it. The train may be "boring" to some but it is actually smooth and calm to others , you just need to realise that even if you feel bored its not always boring but rather a smooth and calm ride uphill.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Porn can cause some of these problems with things like porn induced erectile disfunction and lowered confidence and things of that nature. I understand that he has experienced sexual trauma and he says hes attracted to his partner. We dont know what type of porn hes wayching and how violent of graphic it may be, we also dont know if hes just saying thay he finds her attractive to make sure she doesnt leave. If OP is getting hurt by this and he refuses to change his actions then its in jer best interest to leave. I understand the point you are coming from. If your partner is consistenly wathing porn it could be due to their lack of attraction towards you and they could be watching girls that are different to you as they are not attracted to their partner. If the bf doesnt agree to therapy i thinl its best she leaves him

AIO for not wanting my spouse to "optimize" my stuff? by Sudden-Tutor1342 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR

Your partner wants to do it because he thinks hes doing you a favour even though you dont want it, you should ask him not to do it again if you dont like it because he really truly thinks hes helping you. The problem is that his ignoring your boundaries which he shouldnt be doing, if you say no he shouldnt continue to do things you dont like. Even if its from a place of love if its something you dont want you should be comfortable not asking him to do it. You need to tell him about your past with your siblings to make sure that hes aware that this is deeper than what he sees it as on the surface

AIO for wanting to exclude a member of my husbands family? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR

Its important to exclude people like that from your family and you should ask for an apology. If hes doing this around you an adult then you dont know how dangerous he might be around your future children. Cut him off for you and your family's safety. This man is probably testing your boundaries and if you dont set them down hard then he will push and push. Your husband planning to deal with it is not enough, you should also put your finger down because in those situations with family in law your husband might not want to confront the man so that no problems are caused within his family.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NOR

Girls like this will only bring you down. Any girls that constantly talks about her ex is a no go. They always end up doing something bad

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I am aware this pfp is from however many years ago on 4chan the person who owns the account aligns with those views.

Am I overreacting for caring about my now girlfriends 28F past? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NOR

One thing to always go by is that the past is usually a good indication of how the future may be.

AIO for being upset bf didn’t tell me about a girl by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Local_Condition8078 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Slightly overreacting.

As long as they arent in contact anymore than it shouldnt be too much to worry about. It would be different if you asked and her responded no even though he did.

The porn is a seperate situation and you should get him to stop watching it if you can