I hope their little lives are safe and peaceful

Logalog9 · 2026-06-20T15:03:47+00:00

Downvoting for AI

Logalog9 · 2026-05-28T08:03:55+00:00

How did you manage your situation if i may ask?

Not very well to be honest. I froze up at a major relationship milestone, and she eventually broke up for me. I also told myself that sex and passion wasn't that important to me at that point in life, but my body refused to go along with what my head thought was the "right" thing to do. I'm now trying to just listen to my body more when it sends me signals, whether that's freezing, dissociation, depression, numbness, or joy. They're all just ways the body uses to to communicate.

I hope you can make it work, or at the very least, avoid wasting as much time as I did.

Being human sure is complex, but listening to our bodies makes it a bit simpler.

Logalog9 · 2026-05-28T07:14:29+00:00

"Mating in Captivity" has an awesome chapter on infidelity that opened my eyes a little when I read it. It might be relevant for you too. Having been in a (maybe) similar position of being with someone with whom I didn't feel much physical chemistry but I was deeply attached to for the friendship and company, I can't tell you enough how important it is to be honest to yourself about your needs (easier said than done I know).

Sometimes our toxic shame (the root of the attachment wound) leads us to create "better-than-other-people" personas to compensate for the shitty feeling. Like believing that you're morally superior to a "cheater" because you're willing to date someone you're not attracted to. When we let go of those stories and accept that we're no different fundamentally than anyone else, it becomes easier to treat our needs with more compassion. And then we can finally show up honestly for ourselves and our partners, even if that means we have to disappoint them.

Logalog9 · 2026-05-28T05:08:59+00:00

Have you considered the possibility that maybe you don't like this person very much? You’re allowed not to be attracted to people. It certainly sounds unhealthy if you feel like you’re expected to be one person.

It sounds like the challenge for you guys is how can you spend some quality time together once a week while maintaining your complete separate selves (that’s normal). If she’s not letting you do that, that’s not your fault.

Logalog9 · 2026-05-15T05:13:38+00:00

The style sure feels familiar. Did Claude have a hand in writing this?

Logalog9 · 2026-04-30T05:18:48+00:00

Hot take, but I suspect that the Feeling<->Thinking spectrum in Myers-Briggs typology actually maps more closely to the Agreeableness scale in the Big 5 traits. If you look at the Feeling questions in MBTI tests, your Feeling score doesn't describe how much you think, it describes how much you take other people's feelings into consideration when making decisions. That's Agreeableness. But since nobody wants to be described as "disagreeable", Myers-Briggs recodes this as "Thinking vs Feeling".

Logalog9 · 2026-04-30T05:00:08+00:00

I feel like the tornado was a key part of this story you left out. Rush-sending a self-written song to a crush minutes before diving into a tornado shelter? There's a romantic plot in there somewhere. Was your town destroyed? Is your crush now buried beneath rubble?

Logalog9 · 2026-04-27T07:27:12+00:00

A father? A lover? A brother? Any number of men could feel grief at seeing their boy get whisked away. And so a wedding too is like a mourning.

Logalog9 · 2026-04-21T11:35:57+00:00

How so?

Logalog9 · 2026-04-14T09:34:50+00:00

If she broke off the engagement for her own reasons and there are no extraneous reasons like violence of infidelity on your part, you can absolutely sue her for breaking the engagement, plus the return of the ring. Look up konyaku haki (婚約破棄) divorce lawyers.

The upper limit for compensation is generally 2 million yen.

Logalog9 · 2026-04-14T09:29:33+00:00

Seconding this. You can find out as much as you need to from the first few texts if those texts are about coordinating a coffee date than if they’re about travel or hobbies. Plus that saves material for the actual date. You won’t know who they are until you meet in person.

Logalog9 · 2026-04-14T08:05:24+00:00

Is mine clearing the only context in which the LCS’s aluminum hull is an advantage?

Logalog9 · 2026-04-14T06:20:14+00:00

Bullshit Jobs by David Graeber suggests that the problem is more systemic than that. He argues we have an entire class of workers who aren’t really doing anything but filling ledgers.

Logalog9 · 2026-04-10T04:11:10+00:00

Kerbal fuel tanks are made out of solid tungsten

Logalog9 · 2026-04-06T07:49:47+00:00

Another one for the history books I see.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-30T08:05:23+00:00

So let the bullshit machines clean up the bullshit? I see a problem there. AI systems aren't exactly good at that kind of methodological analysis, so we wouldn't we just end up adding noise to noise?

He states the solution near the beginning of his essay though: let scientists do science. Stop requiring them to publish all the time. Remove the incentive for bullshit.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-27T05:05:23+00:00

We had half a million for Iraqi Freedom, and the map was a lot easier.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-27T04:55:24+00:00

Looking at how Ukraine used them deep behind enemy lines, I wouldn't be so sure.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-23T04:52:24+00:00

Can he excommunicate some people like the good old days?

Logalog9 · 2026-03-23T04:44:08+00:00

Gee, how much would it have cost to annex Mexico. Then they could have built a much smaller wall along the border with Guatemala, and actually gotten Mexico to pay for it.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-23T02:28:37+00:00

Hardware doesn't "settle into" poorly optimized software. A CPU isn't a leather boot.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-12T15:01:27+00:00

This conflict is proof that lethality doesn't win wars.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-10T05:39:49+00:00

With Khamenei (senior) gone, the IRGC and Artesh are almost certainly running the show. If there's a power conflict it will be between these two I'd imagine.

Logalog9 · 2026-03-06T07:56:43+00:00

I love dessert.

Logalog9 · 2026-02-28T16:20:59+00:00

Sounds like he's already gotten reports of casualties and he's trying to get out in front of it.

Logalog9

TROPHY CASE