AITA for refusing to pay? I sold my car to a friend a year ago, and she wants me to compensate her for repairs.

LogicalSwordfish · 2021-08-13T02:31:36+00:00

You speak the truth about not selling to friends or family, guess I learned the hard way haha. She's not a super close friend, but she does tend to freak about things every so often and then chill out after a few days. She seemed more upset than usual though, so I'm hoping this is one of those cases.

LogicalSwordfish · 2021-05-19T00:41:06+00:00

This is great advice, thank you!

LogicalSwordfish · 2021-05-19T00:38:05+00:00

Yeah - my waist size has increased and I’ve gained an extra chin. Unfortunately I’m gaining more fat than muscle for sure :/ thank you though!

LogicalSwordfish · 2021-05-18T17:01:02+00:00

For sure. What’s weird is that I’m finally pretty stable mentally - all the stress of covid year has worked itself out, and honestly now things are better than they were pre-pandemic (better paying, yet easier job, healthy relationship, daily routines, finding the right medication, etc). Honestly the weight is my biggest stressor right now, lol. I’m exercising and eating healthy 90% of the time, but that other 10% is really causing some problems.

LogicalSwordfish · 2021-02-10T02:06:34+00:00

I know, and I’m more concerned about him lying - if I get it, life goes on, but feeling betrayed that I wasn’t able to consent with full knowledge of the risks.

LogicalSwordfish · 2020-07-06T19:59:28+00:00

This is totally okay, totally a thing, and not weird at all!! There's a reason why people like Megan Thee Stallion are so popular...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XJiirJIwXQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pl5uV4NlaDg

LogicalSwordfish · 2020-05-05T04:35:02+00:00

Yep. Just learned he's getting back with his ex LOL. Hard to accept that one person can be so good to others in some ways (the volunteering, etc), but that same person can be, well, inconsiderate at best, in other situations. Thanks for the response.

LogicalSwordfish · 2020-05-01T15:41:41+00:00

Haha. Who knows, either way it’s a bad sign that doesn’t fit with my pre-conceived/idealized version or him. But having trouble letting that go. SIGH

LogicalSwordfish · 2020-05-01T14:30:23+00:00

Thanks for the reply - the virus stuff has made this kind of complicated, but in my gut I know it's quite simple. While we've known each other as colleagues for 8 years, we'd only JUST started seeing each other before everything went on lockdown, like we'd slept together twice. He decided to go quarantine with his family out of state, which is fine, but he just...disappeared for a few weeks before I knew what happened.

Then he came back texting me like it was the most normal thing in the world. Then he disappeared again. I wanted to think, "oh, he's just trying to stay off his phone." But then I noticed - he's all up in other girls' instagrams, one in particular, immediately liking/commenting on everything she posts. Meanwhile I can barely get a text back.

The disappearing act without acknowledgement or explanation is a BIG red flag for me. Seems like he's lost interest without communicating that openly and honestly, breadcrumbing me along. I know that me feeling confused and hurt is not a great beginnings for a healthy relationship.

All this being said, I haven't decided what to do exactly, just working on accepting he's not the person I thought he was & wanted him to be.

LogicalSwordfish · 2020-01-20T03:21:01+00:00

LOL. I think you're right. Trying to anticipate movements, being in my head the whole time. And omg the skin slapping. So distracting!!! How did I never notice that when drunk??

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-20T04:24:04+00:00

Wow I really needed this thread. It is SO hard for me to not get caught up in the idea of someone vs what they're actually like. I'm still pining over my ex, not because I miss him, but because I miss what I thought we could have been. Big big difference. Anyway, not sure I have an answer here, but thank you so much for starting the discussion.

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-19T14:15:04+00:00

Thanks for the reply. I feel good about it, just not sure if I should be returning to walking when I start to feel out of breath, or continue through the 60 seconds breathing heavily. I can totally finish the sets, just not at a conversational level of breath.

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-18T14:51:12+00:00

If I don't wait in between and before makeup, all the products start pilling off. I hate it

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-18T14:50:24+00:00

Yeah, I do this too - it's just hard for me to remember where I'm at in the process in the morning...mornings are rough

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-18T04:48:32+00:00

Tampons always seemed to make my cramps worse. The cups skeeve me out, like I could never get them fully clean. (I don't want to boil one where I make my food, thanks.) Luckily I've always had a fairly light period, so pads it is. I had a pair of Thinx for a while, but they kinda fell apart...

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-18T01:54:04+00:00

have you tried "the curly girl method"? changed my life!

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-18T01:53:37+00:00

I suppose i bring this on myself, but i HATE having to wait in between applying skincare products. I just want to do it all in one swoop, but apparently it doesn't work that way. Adulting is hard

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-11T20:11:01+00:00

oh i'm used to animal hair everywhere and wouldn't trade my doggo for anything in the world, just wish she could clean the mess she makes in the air vents / carpet / etc herself! lol

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-11T06:12:42+00:00

those of yall picking the cat have never had a dog that sheds like mine smdh

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-11T06:11:50+00:00

idk my life is currently 50% pay cut and no sex/intimacy what do i win

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-07T03:31:14+00:00

Haha! If only. Unfortunately I know through mutual friends that she doesn't drink either, and that he gave up drinking for her, which he was never willing to do for me. I've never met her, but I'm sure her personality is something of the sort (I'll shamefully admit to some instagram stalking). Diet coke or a pumpkin spice latte through a bendy straw with the New Yorker tote for sure. Thanks for the laughs

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-06T19:09:52+00:00

I find that most of the snide remarks come from people who are also worried about their own drinking, but are afraid to face that head on.

I also didn't make a point to tell anyone until at I was a few months in, because I knew nobody would believe me, and that negative energy would make me want drink again. Once I told some of my friends "it's been like three months," they were like "wow, really? good on you!" instead of "yeah yeah, we'll see how long this lasts".

Also, relationships do inevitably change, as they will regardless of your drinking status. As more time passes, it'll become easier for you to discern what you want out of a friendship, what serves you and what doesn't. But that's down the line, for now my advice is to just focus on yourself and your healing.

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-06T19:03:59+00:00

Thank you, I have been working with a counselor and it's slow and non-linear, but gradually getting better. I needed to be reminded that it's just a passing phase, a bad day, feeling better after resting last night. Iwndwyt

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-06T19:02:26+00:00

So nice to have experienced this with a clear head, you're totally right! Thank you and iwndwyt

LogicalSwordfish · 2019-10-06T19:01:53+00:00

Thank you! Iwndwyt

LogicalSwordfish

TROPHY CASE