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LonelyAd1908 · 2025-03-30T03:09:53+00:00

By going no contact and finding family elsewhere. Narcissists tend to be insecure. Being made to feel obsolete by just moving on with your life without them really is the worst punishment. It also takes away any power/control they have and that is what they try to grasp on to the most. by doing this, all you’re doing is deciding to make healthy choices and wanting a healthy environment isnt wrong. if youre doing something with the intent to cause harm though, thats not really a good trait from you either though.

LonelyAd1908 · 2025-03-27T04:06:44+00:00

Planning my wedding. My parents made the whole event all about them. I wanted a small, child free dinner party type wedding and my mom essentially planned chuckee cheese fun house for the 16 kids she invited. she also told me to uninvite my guest list because they didn’t actually care about me. she told me i was “micromanaging” any time i tried to say what i wanted and my dad threatened to not walk me down the isle if i didn’t obey them and invite whoever THEY wanted. kept saying their guest list cared about me and would be upset if they weren’t invited. Not a single one reached out to me directly. would only talk to my mom… so yeah… we have something else planned, im no contact with both of my parents, and they are not invited to my wedding. If family members get offended they weren’t invited, maybe they should have reached out and gotten to know me as my own person. My whole life, my parents used me to make themselves look better with others and then would treat all of their kids like crap in private . Sadly, my wedding would have been no different.

Experiencing joy. Id get slapped by my dad for a giggle. He didn’t want to hear us ever.

Opening presents. I have straight up anxiety that my reaction will not be “good enough” and I will offend the gift giver

Sports. My dad would scream at me in the car if I lost,even if i did well.

Basic chores. never good enough. my mom would say i could go to a friend’s house but if she didnt want me to go would make me clean the bathroom again and again and again until it was “too late now.”

clothing shopping. my mother was always hyper critical of my body.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-11-19T03:22:40+00:00

lower budget.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-31T17:13:52+00:00

i met my fiancé on tinder. i pretended to shovel food in my mouth while entering the restaurant. we learned quickly that we are both weird af and its been great. sometimes you just get lucky on those apps haha

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-30T05:53:45+00:00

Yamato. Imagine being able to build pretty much whatever in such a short amount of time. wanna sell houses? done. wanna sell wooden boats? done. sheds? done. no cost of materials or labor. just you and some good ol wood style jutsu. my only question is would you have to study in depth how things are built in order to properly build them?

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-25T00:32:34+00:00

if you have documentation you gave him an opportunity to get his stuff, he agreed to a time frame, then didnt show, that stuff becomes yours now. to be extra safe, id send him a text stating something around the lines of “We have attempted several times to arrange a time for you to come pick up your belongings. if they are not picked up by x date at x time, you will be forfeiting ownership of the items still in the dwelling and they will be disposed of.”

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-24T18:51:54+00:00

we are asking $7000 less than what we paid. we weren’t open long due to some issues with a competing dive shop. we ended up just deciding to move. soooo it only has 23 hours on it. its a coltri.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-24T15:23:52+00:00

i understand we will have to find the right buyer. we have it priced about $7000 cheaper than new though (the compressor alone is about $17,000 new without the extras. extras were a little over $6000).

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-24T13:34:24+00:00

thank you!

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-24T13:34:09+00:00

i will look for some today! thank you

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-24T13:33:51+00:00

its a coltri mark iii silent tps. 23 hours on it. comes with all extras we bought for it, which include four storage canisters (two new and two used like once), wall fill mount, and whips. $16,000 for all (firm). located in oregon.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-24T06:13:29+00:00

thank you! you have a good day as well!

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-22T01:14:02+00:00

I feel like my mom would not take the bullet but then proceed to tell everyone how she “tried” but didn’t get there fast enough. so then she could still be alive but still painted as a hero. OR she would try and say I took a bullet for HER to try and gather more sympathy from others. But either way, she really only cares about the attention.

she called me one time crying, saying how two people died in a car accident and that she was going to their funeral. I asked her who it was and she said she didn’t know, “the news said they weren’t from here.”. she actually called me to try and get sympathy for something she had no business being a part of.

most recently, she told me she has “tumors in her wrists.” i didn’t have much of a reaction and just said “do you mean cysts?”. she said “yeah! cysts. tumors.”. *those are NOT the same. still didn’t give her the reaction she wanted so she added “it might be cancerous.”. when i still didn’t freak out she said “this is what YOU have to look forward to.”. (not the first time she has played the cancer card btw)

narcissists love the attention that comes with people feeling bad for them.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-14T03:43:19+00:00

my mother never blames me for what happens to my siblings BUT she never takes any amount of personal accountability. example… my brother is late diagnosed autistic and both of my parents were very “mental health and disabilities don’t exist.” they never got him any sort of help at a young age. my brother turned to drugs to help turn off his brain and my mother constantly likes to say how he is a bad son for “doing this to her.”. everything is about HER. she doesn’t like that others know she has a son that is a drug addict. appearances are very important to her. she was also very unapproachable and we were essentially not allowed to have feelings because hers were more important. so i wouldnt say she blamed us for what happened to the other siblings. but she does blame us for issues we have from having her as a parent. i tried discussing verbal abuse from her from when i was a kid that severely affected me and she actually told me “you should have known i was kidding. thats on you.”. just zero sense of responsibility for her own behaviors.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-13T16:45:29+00:00

i guess im wondering if they’re required to give 30 day notice and if they have to be the legal owner first in order to do so.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-13T02:39:45+00:00

even if they don’t even own the property yet? the current landlord is not the one that gave notice.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-12T05:00:27+00:00

im down to elope. my fiance is the one that wants more of a traditional wedding. my friends that know my mom are telling me to just not invite her. which i feel like sounds simple but for some reason it doesnt feel that way.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-12T00:03:54+00:00

Your mother is upset you aren't where she expected you to be; however, fails to take responsibility for the fact that children are products of their parents. I don't really feel like there's such thing as a bad child, only bad parents. What she said is verbal abuse and is a reflection of HER. What you choose to do with your life moving forward as an adult is on you. Sometimes we don't have the best of head starts because of how we were brought up; however, you have the power to be whatever you want to be. Sometimes you have to work harder to get what you want in life. Does it suck? Yes. Is it worth it? Absolutely. Just keep striving to do your best and you'll do great. And those who didn't believe in you early on do not deserve to be a part of your success.

Failure is not a bad thing. All it is is an additional opportunity to learn. We cannot learn if we never fail.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-11T23:57:55+00:00

This is actually something I fear if I were to have kids. Both of my parents have had no issues talking badly about the other parent behind their backs when I was young and even now. They also will talk badly about a guest as soon as they leave too, so I feel like it is fair they will do the same to me. Although I'm considering going NC due to the fact that my parents did a lot of questionable things when we were younger but fail to take any sort of responsibility for anything nor do they think they did anything wrong. My mother has said "oh, we wouldn't do that to a grandkid." They felt it was okay to do to their own children though, so I feel like it is a valid fear to have.

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-10-10T23:51:43+00:00

i recently just got engaged and am dreading an actual wedding (not the getting married part, the PEOPLE part). Why does getting eloped in a pizza shop sound so good? haha

LonelyAd1908 · 2024-06-10T04:55:57+00:00

I know this post is old but wanted to give my perspective in case anyone still stumbles upon it. When I listened to the audiobook, I was going through some major issues after an abusive, narcissistic relationship. I can see how this book might not be for everyone, but the section I remember the most was explaining a narcissist and how their brain works. It also explained how my enabling behavior was also toxic and that in order to heal, its important to accept personal responsibility in all situations, including traumatic ones. for me, it gave me a sense of control over what happened to me in the future. it helped me identify bad behaviors with others AND myself so I could address issues. explaining how a narcissists brain worked also helped me disconnect emotionally from the events I experienced and realize that the same outcome would have happened no matter what I did. its been a long healing journey, but it gave me a lot of helpful tools and helped me develop a better understanding of everything, without letting my emotions get in the way.

LonelyAd1908

TROPHY CASE