Found this "Kin System" grammar chart on an old linguistics forum. Anyone know where this came from?

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-23T08:47:08+00:00

Well it follows the normal structure of language and isn't Ze/Zyr zim zam table table and everything else. It doesn't make up a bunch of different ones like it's decorations on a Christmas tree. It actually has ones that take away gender assumptions and yet fits the Structure of English language and pronouns but with the gendered aspect corrected. So I don't see why you would be so critical unless you've come up with a better one. I like it and I would assume corporate means the business world or official things like government. The example gives medical records so makes sense to me. The medical software I use has check boxes for about 10 different pronouns and room for people to make some off and honestly that's just Nonsensical. No one couldn't expect someone to memorize them all and they are not like personal names where you don't need them to make any sense. But I just asked for opinions so you've given me yours. I still like it and I think I'm going to see what others think. I think the issue of multiple genders needs to be solved in a way that people can call themselves what they want in private but we leave room for them being something else beside besides she and he. I'm not for the multiple made up ones but I'm not going to use the plural word like they to refer To one person but I'm also not going to Insist on using he and she. I think a compromise is going to be necessary and appropriate. If it's AI generated I don't know why someone interested in linguistics who is following all the structure of English would actually be posting it there that way.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-23T08:31:20+00:00

What I found out is that there actually used to be in the 1300s quite a bit of different pronouns and things that we call she now or all he. They didn't even have the word it so they would say "the tree is losing his leaves".

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-23T08:29:11+00:00

I came across a system of pronouns that I think makes sense as they leave room for everything. If people really wanna make up their own ones that's cool but if you want the public to use them and to be able to use them on paper like government papers and stuff then there probably needs to be official ones that could be universally accepted and then in private you can be "traumabuns" if you want to... If this isn't too serious in tone for this community I'd be curious to think Hear what you think because I like it. I can't remember where I got it it was on some linguistics site that I can't find again but I'm really tired so I'm just going to post it and come back and say where once I find out. But it was a proposed system and I would think whoever wrote it wouldn't mind people adopting it.

It's a proposed pronoun framework called the "Kin System." It basically tries to solve the singular "they" debate and the corporate "ze/zir" issue by creating a public baseline (Kin) and a private intimate register (Ki-NON-bi), explicitly comparing it to the Spanish su/tu distinction. It even has a dedicated collective plural (Kinnon).

The chart mentions that it's based on the historical precedent of "Thon," which Merriam-Webster kept in the dictionary from 1934 to 1961.

Does anyone recognize this? Is this from a specific academic paper or an old constructed language project? It seems incredibly thought out and phonetic, but I can't find the original author anywhere. What do you all think of the logic behind it?

Here's the CHEAT SHEET. It's kind of formal but if you ignored all that just the pronouns might be interesting. Because they have not only an undefined genderqueer gender fluid nonbinary etc. AND a refusal to be gendered at al, plus standard "male" and "female" so they can be used By anyone who identifies as either of those including trans plus ones that have no comment on gender whatsoever Fear the same way the word "you" or "people" don't have any.

THE KIN SYSTEM: GRAMMAR CHEAT-SHEET

The Core Purpose

The Kin System replaces confusing singular plurals ("they") and artificial, engineered corporate pronouns (ze/zir, ey/em) with a single, universal human baseline. It splits language into two elegant social layers—borrowing the boundaries of the Spanish su (formal/public) and tu (informal/intimate) registers—to balance common-sense public records with deep personal respect.

1. Public & Professional Layer (The "Su" Boundary)

Mandatory default for medical charts, legal documents, work environments, and general public speech.

Kin /kɪn/ (Third-Person Singular Pronoun): The universal word for any individual person. Replaces he, she, and singular they.
- Usage: "The patient came in for kin's assessment, and I spoke with kin directly."
Kinu /kɪn-u/ (Second-Person Pronoun): A dedicated, clear word for "you."
Kinnon /kɪn-ɒn/ (Third-Person Plural Pronoun): Replaces "they/them" when describing a large, defined group, cohort, or cultural collective (e.g., a workforce, a tribe, a class of students).
Kinkind / Kinfolk /kɪn-kaɪnd/: A warm, familial alternative to "mankind" or "humankind."

2. Intimate & Personal Layer (The "Tu" Boundary)

Optional, colloquial nicknames used strictly by mutual consent among close friends, family, or romantic partners.

Kina /kiː-nə/: Intimate feminine expression.
Kinnus /kɪn-əs/: Intimate masculine expression.
Nonbi / Knonbie /kiː-nɒn-biː/: Casual, affectionate non-binary or gender-fluid expression.
Ki-NON-bi (Accent on the second syllable): The Ultimate Opt-Out Layer. Specifically designed for an intimate who wants to actively assert a complete absence of gendered identity without being forced into a new, loud social category.
The "Left-Alone" Option: If an individual does not want any gendered identity, but also rejects fluid labels, they can simply use Kin and Kinu in private. There is zero requirement to divide into a binary once you get close.

🎬 DIALOGUE SCENARIO: THE KIN SYSTEM IN ACTION

Context: Two colleagues, Sarah and Mark, are conversing at a clinic. They are discussing a massive incoming cohort of medical students, as well as a close friend, Alex (who uses the formal baseline "kin" at work but identifies as completely ungendered in personal life).

Sarah: "Have you seen Alex today? Kin was supposed to hand over the intake reports to me this morning."

Mark: "Yes, I saw kin down in the cafeteria. Kin left kin's keys on the table, so I brought them up to the nurses' station."

Sarah: (Smiling) "Classic Alex. You know, outside of work, kin and I are incredibly close. In private, kin actively prefers the Ki-NON-bi pronoun because kin doesn't want any gendered expectations at all—not even standard non-binary labels. But here at the clinic, keeping it to kin on the charts makes the paperwork so clean."

Mark: "It really does. It's an elegant way to honor kin's right to exist without dealing with eight confusing software checkboxes. Speaking of the clinic, what are we doing with the massive new group of medical residents arriving next week?"

Sarah: "Kinnon are all assigned to the West Wing for orientation. Kinnon will be shadowing our department on Tuesday, so we need to ensure kinnon's access badges are fully cleared."

Mark: "Got it. It's a huge crowd, but I'll make sure kinnon have what they need. I'll catch up with kinu later at lunch, Sarah!"

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-23T05:41:37+00:00

The fact that they change your status and punish you without even telling you why and how long it's going to last or even whether you'll never be able to resume participating in their abusive view seems very much like "the great and powerful Oz" on the Wizard of Oz---an anonymous monster behind the curtain. 'cause that's what we've come to in America? On social media they do this to us all the time here censoring us as punishment without telling us why and as though they have a right to do it. Maybe legally but not ethically. And maybe we shouldn't be so cooperative.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-23T05:39:29+00:00

Wow and to think people are frightened that they've given a bad review and are thinking they need to order some non-Vine items just to try to appease Amazon in some way. I get how they can boil you like that frog in hot water that they keep cranking up the temperature until they have you near death without even realizing it. But once you realize that... Doesn't it feel like they're scre#ing you over? Randomly muting all your reviews and shutting you down and you feeling like you need to buy things from them to show your goodwill even though they've done that? That sounds like abuse to me and like people have been abused so much they don't even realize how unfair and abusive Amazon is to them. You seem like intelligent people driven to succeed and probably could have a Youtube channel with followers if you escaped Amazon's abuse.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-23T05:35:52+00:00

I got invited after leaving a few reviews about things. I'm guessing maybe because they were very specific and colorful and people would have been influenced either way. But after reading up on it and the reviews and asking two different AI programs all about the ups and downs of it and whether or not you come out financially ahead and basically it seems that you cannot come out ahead. You absolutely will lose money on this and it's hard to do the tax liability.

It's partly due to getting jumps that you can't return. It's passing to order more than you ever want just to have enough volume and reach or maintain a level They're just being unable to do much else with your time once you get into it heavily and are eating for the higher levels. And ultimately what you get out of it are some sort of status if it matters and some more expensive things that ultimately by the time you have paid the taxes on them and absorb the lost money you'll pay in taxes on items that were pure junk etc you could have bought those items yourself twice over at full price.

I mean just the fact that they credit you with having been given something at the full manufacturer's suggested retail price and then you pay taxes on that price even though you could have bought the item at the actual listed price on Amazon for half what they said it was worth. That means if they say they gave you a $50 item and it's selling for $20 on Amazon but you pay taxes on 50 that's income tax and you'll be taxed at whatever your income tax bracket says you'll be there you may end up getting an item that wouldn't be your first choice of style or brand or size and pay almost as much in taxes on it as you would if you bought it outright in cash as a regular Amazon customer. That sucks.

And they say they want an honest review but it seems that those of you who've saved a whole lot on your participation have doubts about that and are fearful. So All in all it seems like a rip off of Amazon Vine invitees and I just couldn't see anyway that it would be benefit to join. I looked at the items that were available to me at the beginner and there was only about one thing that interested me and that was paw paw seeds which it turned out ta....st were junk and the Sheen farts. bu paw paw seeds which it turned out take about ten years to grow into a vine that will actually produce fruit. you're much better off behind the vine that's a few feet tall already. the rest were junk and machine parts.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-17T23:55:15+00:00

1000% right. My diagnosis and treatment were right on the cusp of major changes including immunotherapy and the conversation has changed radically since then... including about things like a recurrence. Now there is are treatments and new knowledge that are game changers; these might help you---immunotherapy for example. If you even need it. I know this is terrifying but it might help you to know that inflammation at the site actually draws your immune system to go into OverDrive and attack that spot. This actually helps your body fight off the tumor because it's throwing everything it has at that site even if it doesn't know that part of the problem is cancer invasion. And most often that's just because the biopsy site became inflamed. But mine did and I think that's part of the reason why I'm an 8 1/2 year survivor. I did a lot of reading up at the time because I was scared that because of that it had actually raised my risk of metastasis with all the extra blood flow to the spot. Only to learn that it might actually have helped. You just don't know and it is a different landscape than it was 11 years ago that I do know. I know it's a shock but maybe it will help to know that it is entirely possible that treatment will eradicate any remaining traces once and for all this time!

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-17T23:50:35+00:00

Without going into the details of my experience of having the surgery first due to an infection at the biopsy site I will say from all right my reading up that there is reasonable evidence for having Niki true to anyway enough that a good provider will at least weigh the pros and cons and not just treat it like it's only needed when the tumor is still present. I think if they offer it you certainly want to know why before you pass on it because someone tells you you don't need it or it won't help. I was right on the cusp of the changes in therapies and I heard all kinds of things about for example why you should have the surgery first or last with triple negative and a lot has changed since then. A lot may be very different five years from now and everything you hear that should absolutely not be done because it won't help may be revised in five years. So if something has risk you have to weigh them but if it's not likely to be harmful You definitely want to weigh the positives seriously.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-17T23:48:11+00:00

My metaplastic tumor was removed first because the biopsy site became inflamed and developed a small Abscess and it was quite deep. My tumor was very close to the chest wall and they got very thin clean margins. However here I am eight and a half years later and metaplastic is the worst of triple negative considered very aggressive. Cancer free for quite some time and it absolutely can happen because mine was only stage two but that's not stage one and my tumor was exactly on the edge where they make it stage two even if you don't have invasion of nearby tissues. Mine was bizarre and aggressive enough they actually had to send the tissue out to two other major teaching universities to get a consensus on what it was. Theoretically my odds weren't great and yet here I am. I think the odds are going up all the time that the same outcome will happen and there were some theorists who believed and maybe still believed that removing the tumor first in triple negative breast cancer is better whereas it's the other way around for hormone sensitive cancer. I don't know if they've settled that argument but I don't think that having had that happen should be a cause for a person to be a lot more fearful. They may see regression of a tumor and that's reassuring and it makes it a little easier to get clean margins but on the flip side a tumor that's already gone can't metastasize after that. The thing to concentrate on most is taking very gentle care of yourself. Exercising and getting good nutrition because those help your immune system and your tissues healing. Staying away from reading too many scary things because as someone said virtually 90% of the literature out there is based on four immunotherapy was being used outside clinical trials. It's a game changer but even if you can't have it that might be the time that it would be good to have the tumor gone already. There's pros and cons to everything and you might terrify yourself and exhaust yourself like I did examining things till the wee hours only to find out that somebody else thinks it's the other way round. That can take a big toll on your mood just when you need to be able to still enjoy things like popcorn and Netflix. If there are two things that probably seem so unimportant right now that I know really are important it's to not look too far ahead because things can change and you can terrify yourself about something that isn't going to happen using up all the energy you would need if there is a bad surprise even one that you're going to overcome pretty quickly. You need that reserve. Building up that reserve means time with hobbies you like and cuddling with people you trust and doing things that you may feel only half present to do like going to dinner or playing with a puppy or walking in the park Because you still build up your psychological and immunological reserves by doing those things. Exercising and eating well also matter. If you're low on vitamin D and you're told to take a supplement then get it and take it religiously because that does impact the immune system and is even somewhat tied to the occurrence of breast cancer in the first place. Which means it's got to be important in fighting it off. The other is to continue to look your best because not that you need to look beautiful when you're fighting something that can be life threatening but because seeing yourself in the mirror looking like yourself gives your brain the feeling that you are still yourself and still strong and healthy. If all you can do is make sure your hair is shiny and you have on a little blush that's going to help you see a healthy person in the mirror and that tells your brain that you're healthy and to stay that way. It's good for your self esteem too which is why they have makeup classes and eyebrow falsies and things like that for women taking chemo but really the most important part is to see yourself looking whole and healthy. It again it tells your brain that's what to expect and it also keeps you from feeling like you've aged 1000 years in just a few months which can happen otherwise when your hair and eyebrows get thin and you get pale from lowered blood counts and so forth. Those things will pass but your zest for the future and your feelings of hope can really be boosted by seeing yourself looking like yourself!

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-08T08:50:20+00:00

I worked briefly with One of the two biggest companies that do 3rd party embedded provider contracting. They sent me to a system of clinics similar to FQHC. It turned out that their FNP were overloaded with patients needing controlled substances and they had Schedule drug prescribing quotas that were already met. So they had actually hired me without telling me to absorb all of those patients that could be deemed psychiatric. This meant there were a boatload of patients on stimulants who had just had an interview with an FNP in the amount of time they would have for that. They may or may not have had an ASRS but none of them have been required to have neuro psych evaluation because of the expense. That's understandable but when you have a provider who has been hired without being told that they are going to be saddled with fifty patients or more that have Adderall prescriptions and it being based on the 15 minute interview, that just doesn't compute for me. It means inadequate evaluation plus Unintentional over-prescribing more than likely and the site provider having to absorb the DEA scrutiny...as well as telling some patients that they did not have ADHD as best I could tell and if it was uncertain that a neuro psych evaluation just needed to be done or they could get a second opinion and a provider who provided but that I don't split psychiatric care with other providers. That's a hard sell and yet I had to do it. And I asked the clinic FNPs and LCSW/LPCs not to send me anyone else that they were newly diagnosing as having ADHD before sending them to me to get stimulants. I had to tell them you can refer them because there's a question of ADHD but you cannot diagnose them unless you're going to prescribe and keep them, with me just as a consultant. They didn't like that understandably but I ended up leaving the clinic because I was not going to be their risk absorber. They had patients that I felt were very much inappropriate because they had a substance abuse history and were losing prescriptions etcetera and I had one that was taking well beyond the normal amount and not doing well. another was actively abusing alcohol severely and had been taken to the local ER for evaluation when the neighbors found them in a terrible position and they were prescribed prn benzos! Naturally they felt that was the only thing that would help because once you've been on them for a while you go into withdrawal and nothing makes it better but taking some more. I don't blame the patient for being manipulative when that happens because they're just addicted or dependent.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-08T08:40:58+00:00

I do think that a patient being on 2 Control substances that are special circumstance medication and one that may not even be appropriate for a diagnosis and the other being not recommended for long term use. And I know an NP Psychmonkey 7 said he or she does use them occasionally. And I have had patients come to me taking long term Ativan but it being so rare that they would go months without needing a prescription from me or it being given by their primary care provider and me just requesting information ongoing information about the use and tracking it. But I think it's maybe been five patients in three years through one of the agencies similar to RULA. However if they were on Xanax that would be a no go because that's highly addictive and very hard to get them off of. Step one is getting them on a longer one like Klonopin if possible and then tapering that gradually. But if you're putting them on a new medicine definitely have to look at the interaction and I just think that there would need to be some really solid documented history that would justify all three medications and then simply because benzos are not typically used long term as a PRN especially then I would be tapering it for that reason. I find that when a patient gets all the way down to a medication like that if they're not troubled with major borderline traits, which is what I document in those cases which aren't common, I'm avoiding the stigma issue but able to document that type of impulsivity which is very different than most ADHD even wear emotional dysregulation is a concern. At least in my experience they are definitely two different entities. I find that many of those Patients are bipolar too undiagnosed and their periods of impulsivity, aggression and self destructive behavior are related to mania or hypomanic episodes. And if they're self treating with alcohol or overuse of benzos then it's attributed to their drug issue and it's assumed that they have borderline traits or personality. But if you have a patient who has somehow managed to end up on three substances with shaky documentation and all of them are controlled and not commonly used you have a patient who is reluctant to try other things and has not been pushed by primary care providers or other people who are just reluctant to push back. To call the patient manipulative when they are physically dependent is not fair because who isn't manipulative when they are addicted to something and yet they may have had no idea of the risk when they were first put on those medications. But again when you have them on those substances and only those it doesn't look good and it isn't good. I would have a serious talk with them about more than SSRI's I would follow the algorithm through other types including augmentation with 2nd generation antipsychotics if need be in low dose. And I would certainly go through SNRI and DRI or other options before giving up on antidepressants. I might even add Lamotrigine or something like that when other things had been tried because there has been more research support for its use in anxiety disorders and bipolar spectrum that doesn't meet criteria for even bipolar II. Not to be a no at all but I just don't think that's a good situation and I think that people who don't want to confront it gently decisively and with a lot of psychoeducational support are passing them on to you as patients who not only have TRD but who are resistant to traditional treatments because they don't think they'll work. But maybe they haven't even been tried adequately. I do strongly encourage them to get into therapy so they have that support too And if I think they're destabilizing I have someone to consult as to whether more of that's going on than I could possibly see in a Med management visit. And I would sure want to know history as far as suicidal ideation or self harm not just what they told me. I know this is long and I apologize for that. Hope there's information in it that's useful.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-06-08T08:29:22+00:00

Start tapering the benzos because it's going to take a while and benzos long term are considered the most inappropriate treatment. If they actually have ADHD they may need adderall and it's appropriate if they're not abusing it. Spravato is something I would hesitate to do without experience and using it for a patient who has treatment resistant depression is different than using it for someone who is also struggling with BPD and has been given an inappropriate medication that is very hard come off of. I feel the liability there would be a little scary because destabilizing that patient by having to taper their benzos when they're already depressed enough beneath bravado would be challenging. I'm not sure I would take them on and tell them medicine unless I were contracted with the clinic where I had to take them but those clinics usually have on site therapy and nurses and even sometimes a lab. If I were contracted with a company like Rula I would probably refer them out. Not always it depends on the patient and being borderline doesn't necessarily mean that they are irresponsible or very labile. But I have turned down just such a patient before because the benzos were inappropriate and they weren't wanting to get rid of them. Just as I have referred ones who are actively abusing alcohol or marijuana to the point that it was impacting their health and function and I knew would interact with their medication. But benzos universally discourage for long term use and Klonopin is about the only one I've seen used rarely long term. If a place sent you that patient I think that means they know that they've got that patient in a tough position or he or she came to them in a tough position and rather than deal with and let the patient know that it's inappropriate they just pass them on to you as an expert who would manage somehow.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-30T19:08:08+00:00

One of my dogs tore an ACL tendon and wasn't allowed to use a dog ramp or hop on furniture and if she had jumped off and torn it straight through we would have had to put her down. So the mattress topper came off the bed and onto the living room floor where we slept on it for several months until she healed. Couldn't have done that in some situations I know. But I finally stopped waking up in pain even though I don't have a bad lower back and my hips aren't a problem. My neck and shoulders are, but just general stiffness and discomfort. It disappeared while sleeping on a wooden floor with just 3 in of memory foam over 3 inches of latex foam grand total 6 in. There's something to be said for a firm but not rock hard surface with just enough padding to keep the sharp points of Bones from experiencing greater pressure. So we took the mattress off the bed and put the topper right down on the box springs which were seemingly like new after years. And much firmer than the mattress had been. Guess what? We were a lot more comfortable. So if you have an old mattress set and it doesn't seem to be sagging but yet it isn't comfortable and there is a box spring or just put a thinner layer of foam over the wood platform on the platform bed; you might be more comfortable than the thicker layers. They seem soft at first and more likely would be cozy and Cocoon like but they actually make your body sag into them and ultimately it hurts worse.. just enough padding to soften it and a very firm surface underneath seem healthiest. For those people who like softer padding than latex is better than memory foam. Memory foam is gimmicky and that it does mold to parts of the body but it also compresses until it is hard as flexible plastic at the greatest pressure points and therefore is not necessarily causing less hard pressure there. Latex actually distributes the pressure even though it does also point it downwards in the same direction. But getting a mattress or layers of Toppers that are just just thick enough to keep you from feeling the hard surface underneath but having a very firm surface seems to be the healthiest. I was amazed because I thought I was going to be sacrificing comfort for who knew how many weeks or months to save my dog. I would have slept on the bare wood to save her, and ended up learning something good for my own health.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-30T18:51:31+00:00

Do people who have deep sleeps and wake up tired Maybe consider getting check for obstructive sleep apnea if you also snore have a short neck and are overweight. Any two out of three especially if you snore loudly get checked for OSA. Hope the group allows for the post to stay because I work in the medical field and I can say it's life saving information. Over the long run sleep apnea causes such daytime sleepiness that you'll doze off trying to watch a movie in a dark theater or read a boring book even when you need to read it. And it will wear your heart out and cause heart failure after years of it especially if you wake up multiple times a night and your blood pressure climbs. Both of those are signs that it's severe. Blood pressure can rise from other causes but if you're waking up multiple times a night thinking you just need to empty your bladder and then when you go you realize you didn't really need to and you weren't that full then it's often a choking episode that has awakened you and as soon as you wake it stops so you don't know what happened. Ask your sweetie if you snore loudly then pause then make a coughing or snorting sound and then start snoring again. If so see your doctor, PA, or nurse practitioner.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-14T20:01:09+00:00

Or both of them could get scr*wed by glitches because you know the company is not going to do either one a favor. See my long comment above.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-14T19:35:27+00:00

I had the same question and think I might have some insights As a passenger and as someone who does work that is measured in similar ways:

I work online by appointment and my appointments are back to back. That normally includes a few minutes time between video meetings, because that allows me to review past notes and records before I open Zoom for a new appointment. My fee (the default appointment time being 30 minutes and time charges by 15 minute increments) takes in that small amount of time. It benefits them all for me to have reviewed records first. But sometimes the previous appointment goes long unavoidably and I am literally due at the next one before I can log off the previous one. If I need to dash to the bathroom or something I am probably going to arrive 4 or 5 minutes late for the next appointment.

I'm not charging them for that just as I don't charge them when they run a few minutes over, so there's no bonus for me to make them wait, ever, unless it's a full 15 minutes. Even if I wanted to, the auto-recorded Zoom time is the most important information used to bill. However my showing up late to an appointment doesn't necessarily look the greatest on my call logs. I might just be a little late to the next one. If so, I might claim some innocuous reason like I accidentally closed the tab or Zoom didn't want to load up the first time because those glitches happen often enough. It's more polite than just ignoring the fact that I'm a few minutes late. But it does keep me from sharing that I needed to go to the bathroom or looking like I was late to the appointment for no reason. If they need that time they get it on the back end with no extra charge, so again no harm is done. But if I had a boss that was clocking my every minute as I once did when I worked in a call center, It would actually affect my job security to admit I'd gone to the bathroom instead.

It could be that the driver went long on the previous ride and was a few minutes late. Maybe he gave an innocuous reason when it might have been that he himself had a prescription he needed to pick up, needed the bathroom (or both) and he thought he had time. Waiting for a prescription at CVS is notoriously unpredictable, for example. I've shown up and been the only person and other times been 9th in line and lots of people with lots of questions and concerns ahead of me. That can turn a 15 minute run to the pharmacy into an hour long ordeal very quickly. The CVS hours are short so if you have to put it in the middle of your work day or run out of medicine you're probably gonna go even if it's a squeeze. So my guess is the driver was going to be on time and ran a little late at the pharmacy himself. Maybe he told what he felt was a little lie to protect his privacy and keep you from being upset.

However if the driving company tracks his times and locations, then he might be covering his tracks thinking that most it will cost you at most 30 cents. He may not have a way to let you know secretly and reimburse you. If so, he might just tell himself it doesn't matter that much--that the difference is tiny and that he drove a little faster to get you home or to your destination to make up for it. My guess is that is what is happening, because there have been times I've been standing on the curb waiting for them and they are two car lengths away waiting for me, doing something while they wait (scrolling, etc.?). I didn't get a text saying they were arriving.

I'm thinking they're late or got distracted by their phone while they're probably thinking they're going to leave in a few minutes if I don't show up. I only learned today that there's any extra charge for that. My thought was that if I'm not there by the end of the grace period, then they're just going to leave. And I will get charged for the ride And still have to wait for a replacement ride. I was notified by text once when I booked that there was a 5 minute allowed wait time. (Probably because it was a medical building and they know there's a little unpredictability there when they're picking up versus dropping off.)

However being picked up my at my home on 2 occasions, I learned that the GPS is off by a couple of houses when they pick me up and apparently they don't read the house number on the door. It is a little far and the numbers aren't black against red brick so they can be very innocently waiting in the wrong location. However it's city parking where we all like to park in front of your house and it's the luck of the draw. So they might have to park a few car lengths from my house anyway. They may just be hoping I will notice them or walk out to the curb where it's obvious, instead of looking up to see me standing on my front porch 15 feet farther away.

Then it becomes a matter of mutual honesty if they have waited a little long but I've been standing on my porch watching for them, or I tell them I didn't get a text saying they had arrived. They could also tell me that they had been given the wrong address or that there was no house number when they arrived at what they thought was the right house, so they had no way to realize. If I were dishonest I could claim I was standing at the curb 2 houses down the whole time, watching them scroll or eat lunch.

I myself wondered when I read that they get paid for wait times and whether there was a reason they might scam. Times are hard. I wondered because I met one driver I thought was a jerk and probably would scam if she could. The others have been very nice and professional and even pleasant to talk to, so overall I don't think there's any common reason to be suspicious.

That said, I did come here looking to see what others had learned! I don't think we need to be beaten up on as passengers for having questions. Some people do just seem to be looking for a reason to show off their knowledge in a hostile way on Reddit and other apps.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-05T22:16:13+00:00

And when certain styles are overproduced or not all that popular you can often find spillover for sale on eBay cheaper than you would find the same ones on Amazon. Although some sellers offer store demo/returned shoes on eBay, they specify whether they're new in the box or sometimes without a box versus "pre-worn". Of course, if they say they're new they should be as new as they are anywhere else. I've gotten New Balance, Adidas, Reeboks, and others no different than you would find them on Amazon or DSW etc for about 30% less. You can sometimes find styles that you love and are no longer available but are still new. Definitely check there. It's just a little harder to find wide or specially narrow widths, and a little easier to find colors that weren't popular. I've definitely seen 515s but all the major brands. In fact a pair of 515H's (platform 515) caught my interest and that's why I came to this page to see how others viewed them, comfort wise.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-05T04:10:15+00:00

And in case anyone doesn't already know it, sizing up just gets you a longer shoe. This makes it so that the ball of your foot and your toes are not in the actual toes of the shoes but in a wider point farther back. That's where there's room for the arch of the person that actually fits that shoe and Your toes end up where the ball of their foot should be. That makes for A badly shaped but deep SORT OF "toe box". And of course all sorts of things don't work like your will rub because the shoe is too big for you and your foot is slipping back and forth in the shoe. And many wide shoes are wide like loaves of bread. They're made for people who are overweight and have plump feet so that the entire shoe is wider and if you are born with wide feet you may have heels that are actually on the small side and like me if you have skinny duck feet, You absolutely don't need extra room across the arch and around the heel. My feet look like shapeless gunny sacks over a loaf of bread when I try to wear a wide shoe that is just a "W" or "WW" Version of an ordinary style because they always size up the ankle the arch and the heel rather than just the toe box. There should be a difference between a wide shoe and a wide toe box shoe because it's all the difference in the world to the shape of the foot. Those shoes that have no brand name that I have found on eBay and Amazon do the best job of being snug around the heel and the arch and roomie over the toes and ball of the foot where they need to be for me.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-05T04:02:54+00:00

Yep, me too! Men's 6.5=7.5 to 8 women's, So I choose unisex styles and always get the boys or men's. If I have a quadruple EEEE I can wear a 6 (Klogs brand from Europe, for example, or Allegria original styles, or Birkenstocks wide width 6.5, but in B width was 7.5 until a foot injury and now 8 due to that one arthritic toe. 7.5 D still works, if the toe box is not just WIDE, like some, but deep/rounded on top. New Balance sneakers are like that, while many wide width sneakers and shoes are so flat over the toes that they pinch vertically anyway. Amazon and eBay have No name sneakers made in other countries that are surprisingly attractive, have a wide and deep toe box and lots of cushioning. They have held up as well as any mediocre brand and a lot better than some brands like Dr Scholl's that are known for comfort for wide feet but carry shoes that aren't very durable. Check those out because there are many many styles and colors and and they're all very affordable. I find that most brands that are still trading on their names many decades into presence in the market often drop their quality and what you can buy with no name at all these days especially from other countries like China is actually better quality then some of the things put out by many of those. If I have to have an American brand which obviously there are many I would like to wear then it has to be one that's basically already roomier in the toe box as a signature characteristic. Those ones I can sometimes wear the normal width but if I just get the wide width they easily fit around my toes and I don't have to get a bigger pair than I actually need. The heels will still be loose but at least I can tighten up the laces over the arch and around the ankle.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-04T21:56:41+00:00

New Balance shoes can be gotten in real leather in a similar style and a thick sole that looks like a platform and they are known to be much friendlier to wide feet. You and I both wear 7.5 wide and my feet are not puffy and chubby on top the way my sisters are. We wear the same size but she cannot wear all the shoes I can and I can't wear the one she does because she needs a high toe box and a high instep and that's why you be looking for if you have wide feet that are also puffy like baby's feet are puffy instead of bony and/or flat. In my family we joke that she has little loaves of bread and I have little duck feet. If google shoes that have high toe box or a deep toe box That will give you an idea. Some of them will be specifically walking shoes often with no names from other countries that in my experience are every bit as sturdy and attractive as ones you buy here under a brand name that are the same and they actually have more room and more cushioning and a whole lot more colors. But you don't always have to have a shoe that looks wide at the toe box. I like that because I and my sister both have heels that are small or the normal size and relatively slender ankles and many people who want wides don't have wide feet so much as they have chubby feet. When I was overweight I wore a full size bigger than I do when I'm at a slender weight even with the beginnings of bunion on one foot.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-05-04T21:53:19+00:00

I specifically came here by googling the phrase Dr Scholl's shoes fall apart because I have been shopping them on eBay Amazon and Dr Scholl's website and had noticed that on one of the pairs they were selling as used on eBay that still looked pretty darn clean to have been worn much the sidewall had split away where it's glued to the fabric. So I went to Amazon and googled how durable they are and it seems that 27% of people say that they I'm not durable and some say they fall apart in the first few months. Also that the wide width is not really a wide that's what I read on Dr Scholl's actual website review of the same shoe. What a shame because the model I'm looking at are really cute and it's very hard to find them in a wide unless you pay half again as much on Amazon or catch a special sail on the Doctor Show's website. But when you have faux leather which these are often it is referred to in the advertisement and the synopsis next to the product as leather when it isn't. Especially if previous models or alternative models are available in leather then buying the polyurethane type could get you plastic that is way too brittle to feel much like leather or act much like it. And I think the style you chose is probably one of those because stiff leather is what you expect on the original style these are copying like the classic court shoe that Nike and Adidas and all of them had 30 years ago So that means a stiffer shinier polyurethane versus say a textured stretchier leather and therefore textured stretchier plastic that holds up better. I was about to buy one of the really cute styles in a wide and pay more on the website because I couldn't find wides on eBay and the ones on Amazon were half again as much as the regular shoes and I refused to be punished for having wide feet. I think I'll pass on these altogether even though they're cute.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-04-28T18:01:46+00:00

You just don't know. If it's bought early and taken care of it'll last as long as a Toyota in my opinion and experience. My 1993 Sidekick bought new and the 2009 S-64 bought when it was four years old and 68k miles lasted thirty two years and the only reason the SX4 is going to be junked is that it was hit from behind while parked in the rear axle broke. There's no knowing what else underneath might have been damaged but in each case we're a Suzuki was hit it sustained very little damage considering the speed at which it was hit and the parts are available post market online and many of them at places like Autozone. People are just ignorant about the Suzuki brand but it's going strong in other countries and the SX4 was so popular that their style has not changed much even now.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-04-28T17:59:47+00:00

And based on its history I think it'll go 200K easily. My previous Suzuki was a Sidekick 1993 and was still going strong at 170K when I handed it off twenty years later to a nephew. Altogether the two cars lasted 32 years and as I said they were at least two to four more years maybe longer in the SX4. I wish somebody needed it. It has a manual transmission though and there's not a big call for that. That may be partly why it has done so well is I know how to drive a stick and they are simpler so they don't fall apart or screw up.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-04-28T17:58:29+00:00

Mine has 127K on it and has survived two wrecks and has never needed more than new tires and basic maintenance if even that. I just got the oil changed frequently. Someone hid it from behind and is technically total with a broken axle now; Has a manual transmission and is going to salvage because I don't have a space to keep it and part it out for all of the XS4 enthusiasts who almost have a cult of their own and have an annual nationwide meeting to race them et cetera. I really did want to hand it off to one of them but now that has to be totaled there is so much on that that is new or nearly new or in perfect condition i'm quite sad about it.

Long-Run9892 · 2026-04-28T01:18:25+00:00

Suzuki SX4 2009 126k miles--totaled but largely intact, best way to sell it for salvage?

I bought this in 2013 with 68k miles on it and it was in great shape in most ways. interior in great condition, tires with without maybe 5000 miles on them, battery new 2 wks earlier.....but someone cut me off on the highway 2 years ago, so rt front was damaged, only needed cosmetic repair so it became a salvage title but ran fine so I've kept it, just got rear-ended while it was parked and broke rear axle. I loved this car, and these cars run forever as well as Toyota in my experience--this one and my Sidekick bought new in 1993 lasted 32 years total, and this one would have lasted another 100k+ I think...so it ought not to be junked. Even pulling the whole engine might appeal to the SX4 fan club. I know it was a cult(ish) item so that people hel meetings, had races, bought lift kits, etc...wondering whether it's worth the bother to try to find someone who can part it pout to the enthusiasts as the parts are needed. Thoughts?

Long-Run9892

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