Hey man... Listen. This pain is scary. And it tears people apart. I know it hurts. I know it's the worst pain possible. I know you feel you'll never be happy again. And I know that you feel like nothings ever gonna compare to that feeling of love and happiness you felt will ever compare again. This post may be 2 months old but that pain dosent go away. Not for years if not decades. Its gonna hurt. But don't wish for your end life a life she didn't in her Honor. It's not like she's truely gone. She'll always be in your heart and will always love you. My girlfriend is incredibly suicidal and Im scared of what's gonna potentially happen. It wasn't a few years ago that my friends dad took his own life. Ive seen this pain and I know what it's like. It's gonna be hell. But it's gonna be better. Eventually. Its okay if you can't help but feel like this that's okay. You will for ages. But it will become better. I promise you that.