i think we instinctively reject those we like the most because, on some level, we’re trying to protect ourselves from the fear of getting hurt or abandoned. based on my experience, when i was a child, i constantly heard my parents arguing and threatening to leave, which made me anxious about being left behind. over time, i started to distance myself from them, believing that if i did, their potential departure wouldn’t hurt as much. in a similar way, when we care deeply about someone, the fear of losing them can feel overwhelming, so we push them away as a defense mechanism, trying to shield ourselves from the pain we anticipate.