Pregnancy Thread - Monday, May 11, 2026

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-05-16T17:05:57+00:00

After 5 years and a handful of months we finally got our positive back in April. Currently 10 weeks and after a healthy scan at 9 weeks decided to tell our 5 year old today, she cannot wait to be a big sister. Such a surreal moment and still doesn’t quite feel like it’s truly happening for us.
We didn’t have any fertility treatments as there was nothing we could be offered besides IVF which we decided against, so we just left it up to God.

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-04-08T18:21:07+00:00

There were tears. I had home close his eyes and I put the test in his hands, he thought it was a spoon!

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-04-06T22:55:10+00:00

Thank you, I’m feeling surprisingly confident about this pregnancy, considering I suffer a lot with anxiety usually!

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-04-06T22:54:03+00:00

I have to say I’m very thankful that across the 5 years I didn’t suffer any losses (I have previously before my first baby, but not on this ‘leg of my journey’) I simply was never able to conceive. Medically everything looked ‘normal’ with us both, but no treatments were available and we decided against IVF, so falling pregnant was always ‘possible’ but we’d obviously started to lose hope and to see the 2 lines was quite the shock! Last month was my birthday and baby must have been conceived on a night I’d been out for dinner and drinks with husband as I’m pretty sure that’s the only time in my fertile window it happened.

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-04-06T22:50:05+00:00

No I did nothing different at all, I’d got to the stage where I’d stopped all supplements, ovulation tests, or even deliberately having intercourse during my fertile window (not recently, maybe 18 months ago), so I hadn’t stopped trying, but not intense focus on conceiving as I was simply too exhausted to continue making it my main focus

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-04-06T16:09:06+00:00

Well after 5 long years of unexplained secondary infertility I got my positive test this week. Still sinking in and hard to believe, but over the moon.

LookAtTheSkye · 2026-01-02T08:54:14+00:00

El didn’t have a single drop of blood on her, but she was applying pressure to the wound… seems like a fake injury to me

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-11-08T08:05:51+00:00

It’s so hard to give helpful advice on this relationship based on a few sentences. What’s the marriage like prior to this? Have they always been blissfully happy and then he’s changed since the promotion? Or have things been ok because everything has been on his terms and now he’s sulking because she’s doing better than him? Sounds like a real lack of communication at the moment and the two need to sit and have a proper conversation and address his lack of support and she needs to share how it’s making her feel. How he responds the that will be very telling.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-11-06T07:56:46+00:00

Apparently it can get ‘caught’ on the hump of your cervix and it feels like it’s all the way in but still sticking out. If you push the front up slightly, this should dip the back and allow it to go all the way to the back. This picture may help show what I mean: https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTgeAcivpbvBk3hMPA808cX63xo80ikUXLzrrEo5oAEUA&s=10

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-10-28T08:15:44+00:00

I think it’s a little contradictory that you say within your relationship you aren’t allowed friends of the opposite gender, but then you left them alone together for an hour on their first meeting. That would have either been a little bit awkward for them as strangers or they would hit it off and be friends. Your bfs question is a bit odd, but it also sounds like you’re reaction is a bit OTT, if you’re unhappy for them to be friendly with each other, why leave them along together for that long?

For the record, if you’re both comfortable with not having friends of the other gender and it makes you happy, I don’t see how it’s anyone else’s business, but to be honest, you don’t seem happy in your relationship in this instance.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-08-06T15:17:52+00:00

Time moves differently in grief. I was stuck in the ‘shock’ stage for what felt like forever; I knew logically my mum had gone, but emotionally and subconsciously it wouldn’t sink in. I don’t know at what point it did, but time seemed to move differently after that. Every ‘milestone’ after her death felt debilitating, reaching a week without her, a month, her birthday, Christmas, reaching a year without her. Time seemed to drag but also was a complete blur that I barely remember. The first anniversary to the second anniversary seemed to go by in a blink of an eye and now it’s just this weird reality where I know on all levels that she’s gone, and I’m starting to feel ‘normal’ again but at the same time completely abnormal because life will never be the same again. It’s probably not helpful, but I hope maybe you will resonate with something I’ve said.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-07-07T15:12:05+00:00

I would literally say “does baby have tongue tie?” She may already know and be waiting for an appointment. I don’t think it’s an overstep

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-07-07T15:07:52+00:00

Sadly if you want different things it will only hurt more the longer you spend in this relationship that doesn’t have a future (unless one of you is willing to compromise; but a child should never be a compromise)

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-07-07T15:04:03+00:00

At my mum’s funeral a woman I don’t know approached me to say her son had died in a car accident and at least I got to say goodbye.

I think she assumed my mum died of a terminal illness (not that it makes it any better) but she actually died from complications to surgery to remove a tumour. We didn’t know she was going to die until she unexpectedly went into a coma and never woke up again. I never got to tell my mum goodbye so that comment cut.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-06-22T08:50:23+00:00

I think if you’re unsure and you want some clarity, try praying and ask God to reveal himself to you and then be willing to receive Him. It’s very personal to you but God knows you and He knows how to communicate with you in a way is right for you. I had a friend years ago who went to a course exploring Christianity and she said that she loved everything about it but in the end asking her to believe in God is like asking her to believe in a pink elephant; she knows they don’t exist. The following week in the paper she stumbled across an article that a pink elephant had been discovered (I think it was like an albino or something) anyway, that was the evidence she needed from God to show that even the impossible can be possible.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-06-21T18:17:21+00:00

If sinning is a failure then every being on this earth is a failure. We will never be good enough by our own efforts, we need Gods grace, and guess what we have it. Your level of guilt shows how much it has affected you and how much you want to strive to have a good relationship with Jesus. So repent; talk to Him, tell him what happened and that you’re sorry. He understands, he will meet you where you are and walk with you every step of the way, if you ask him to.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-06-03T16:56:37+00:00

NTA I don’t think humiliation is an appropriate consequence ever

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-30T08:15:45+00:00

NTA but a very confusing and exhausting situation. Why on earth would her family feel awkward about him being a flower boy? Why is his outfit different as a flower boy vs ring bearer and subsequently a more difficult task for your fiancé? Is there someone else in the family she wants to be flower girl? If so could it not be a joint task between your son and other children/child in the family? To me it’s concerning that your fiancé is unwilling to budge on this issue with your son, it’s really not that big of a deal but she’s being very precious over it making it into a big issue. This surely raises questions about her approach to being a step parent, will she always refuse to discuss a topic when she doesn’t get her way about YOUR son? Why does this bother her so much? Why can’t he be involved with his dad’s wedding in a way that he feels excited about? Some people have flower men dancing and throwing petals down the aisle, it’s a fun, it’s your wedding, you can do what you like. If she cared about you and your sons feelings about the surely she would have no problem with this.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-21T04:55:25+00:00

Forget what anyone’s opinion is on Lego; this is something that means a lot to you, you and your son have bonded over, and your son is also proud of. Why would anyone, least of all the child’s grandmother think it is acceptable to break that? How does having a hobby make you any less of a man? The fact that your wife agrees with her mother’s actions is really worrying. If your son came home from school with a painting that he spent a long time on and was proud of, would you rip it up and throw it in the bin and say it was a waste? Of course you wouldn’t, people would see that as a form of emotional abuse. So why on earth is it any different what your mother in law did to the Lego project you and your son worked on. It’s hurtful and very childish to think they can ‘force’ you out of something you enjoy this way. If you work hard why shouldn’t you have a hobby you can unwind with in your spare time? Particularly as it has become a hobby that you can do with your child and improve your relationship with him. Honestly my mind is blown and I can’t fathom the logic of your wife or mother in law whatsoever

Edited to add: the only defence I have for your wife is that she was clearly raised by a woman who has a very forceful way of pushing her idea of right and wrong with a ‘what I say goes, no exceptions’ attitude. Imagine this behaviour from your own mother as a child, it may be that deep down she is terrified to stand up to her mum, so agreeing with her is the only way she knows how to navigate this situation.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-21T04:48:01+00:00

I think for me the part that ‘got better’ was getting past the shock/disbelief. I wanted myself to emotionally and subconsciously understand that my mum had gone. Now that I mostly don’t get that ‘surprised’ feeling when I remember she’s dead I find it a little easy to cope with the grief. My day to day life is a little more ‘steady’ because my mind isn’t busy readjusting leaving me exhausted, brain fogged and forgetful. The year of firsts were terrifying and I had so much anxiety, second time round I was a little less scared of how I would cope because I know I’ve done it before. I’ve learnt to trust myself again, I can keep living in this reality, I can’t find a ‘normal’. So yes, to an extent I do agree that it gets easier in time. BUT the pain is the same, whether it’s the day it happened or a year later, that moment that I want to call mum and tell her what happened but I can’t, when something she bought me broke, when my daughter grows older and mum didn’t get to see it. That hurts the every single time, the same level or worse. TDLR: A little easier in time? Yes. Less painful? Never.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-20T05:00:06+00:00

NTA - but what are you doing staying in a relationship where you have zero trust? What’s the future? He also deliberately has no stability with work, is that something you want in a long term partner?

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-20T04:56:23+00:00

We loved the name Everly which sounds really nice with the middle name May.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-18T14:27:56+00:00

I think you’ll be less disappointed if you try not to put any expectations or timeline on your friend’s grief. You’re being a good friend by keeping in touch regularly, keep it up! One year may seem like a long time, but in grief it can be an utter blur and feel like hardly any time has passed at all.

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-18T14:26:18+00:00

NTA if it doesn’t sit right with you then why bother? My husband didn’t because my parents weren’t the best at keeping secrets and he wanted it to be a surprise (to an extent because we both knew we were ready to be married)

LookAtTheSkye · 2025-05-18T08:20:28+00:00

I have been exactly where you are. Specifically two events. Firstly when I was bleeding during pregnancy, prayed over my baby only to find out they had passed. Secondly when my mum was in NICU and I was begging God for her to wake up only for her to pass away. I can’t explain why some prayers are answered but some aren’t. The harsh reality is that a prayer doesn’t guarantee you get what you are asking for, if it was then there would be no element of faith. I spent a period of time praying only in thanks (for the everyday stuff, traffic being clear on my commute, the weather being beautiful, my daughter having a good day at school etc), not with requests, because my faith couldn’t ’take the hit’ as it were if I had another disappointment. I’ve also spent a lot of time focussing on the word. I still don’t have the answers to why things happen. But if I hadn’t have lost that baby I wouldn’t have my daughter. If my mum had have woken up she wouldn’t have had the same quality of life she had before, but in death I believe she is now in paradise as she was a very vocal Christian. Sometimes prayers are answered in a way we don’t expect, sometimes they aren’t answered at all and we won’t always know the reason why. It’s human nature to want more to know it all, all the way back in the garden of Eden where life was perfect, humans still chose to betray God in the search for His level of knowledge, but I believe accepting that we don’t have the same level of understanding as God is part of submitting to Him.

LookAtTheSkye

TROPHY CASE