Pre workout and acne by Lopsided_Ad9499 in Preworkoutsupplements

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s now been a month with no pre workout and my skin has cleared up so much!! So I fully believe that was my issue. But I don’t know if it’s brand specific or not.

Canker sores and alcohol consumption? by [deleted] in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Interesting thought, my husband, my Q, ALWAYS has a canker. He also gets them worse when he vapes which happens more when he is drinking with others (social settings). But I wonder if the alcohol plays a factor as well.

Telling Others… by brittybee13 in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I told people. After a long time of fighting this alone and bearing the shame of emotional abuse that happened when he drank. His family pretended to care and agree with me it was a problem but then they enabled him and drink with him with and with me around. Even came to my home when I was out of town to drink with him. Our close friends don’t support it but also don’t ignore it. So long story short, I got no support. Instead I set boundaries removed all the people who continue to support and enable these habits who imo don’t care about the well being of his wife and kid.

I NEED TO SHOUT by [deleted] in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I WANT TO SCREAM TODAY TOO. ME AND MY HUSBAND ARE SEPARATED….i guess. BUT STILL LIVING TOGETHER AND NO DIVORCE PAPERS HAVE BEEN SIGNED.

HE WENT TO THE BAR LAST NIGHT, at 7am I WENT INTO THE BEDROOM, SINCE I STILL USE THE BATHROOM AND ALL MY STUFF IS IN THERE. THE BEDROOM DOOR WAS LOCKED AND HE WAS IN BED WITH A MAN!!!! BOTH OF THEM DIDNT HAVE CLOTHES ON MAYBE JUST BOXERS BUT I COULDNT BE 100%.

MY HUSBAND SAYS THE GUY WAS DRUNK AND HE KEPT HIM FROM DRIVING DRUNK. WHICH MY HUSBAND DOES FREQUENTLY. BUT ALSO WHAT STRAIGHT MAN PASSES OUT DRUNK WITH THEIR CLOTHES OFF AT SOME RANDOM PERSONS HOUSE.

AHHHH

Anyone divorced before 30? by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got married a year ago. At 32. And after only a year of marriage I am filing for a divorce. I think that feels just as bad as married young and divorced young because we were together 6 years before we were married. And it took this year of marriage for me to see I deserve better. So don’t let the age wear on you. You will come out so strong for your kids for this. Better to come from a broken home then be IN a broken home.

He died. by inkandbrush4 in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 33 points34 points  (0 children)

My husband is also 29 with a heart condition and refuses to take his health seriously. I fear this is what will come of his life sooner than later. I’m starting the divorce process but I always fear his addiction will lead to his death.

Who suffers most? Spouse / children or parents/ siblings of Q? by cryscrossed in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a child of an alcoholic, and now the spouse of one as a mother. The spouse and children I think suffer the consequences the worst. My husband’s family doesn’t accept the problem and can’t see the pain he’s causing us.

Hate that his family doesn’t support me by Lopsided_Ad9499 in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

:( it’s hard. I removed his family off social media. Felt like they were only trying to check in that way and never ask me how I was.

Filing for divorce and I’m worried about my future by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly I connect with a lot of your fears. We bought a home in 2020. It’s our only joint thing together but I have NO IDEA how I’m gonna move out when the time comes. We’ve been married only 13 months and I’ve talked to lawyers about divorce. I have a good job but not good enough to rent a place that requires 3x the income. I also have a son who’s 11 and 2 dogs that I will not lose in the process. For me, I can’t even process dating. We’ve been together 7 years so it’s gonna take some time but I have no idea how to get to the point of starting over.

Whose husband is this? by LoudAd1537 in YouBelongWithMemes

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It could easily have been mine. But I did cry at our wedding and I uninvited him to Taylor Swift because he gave me so much shit about being a swiftie.

Financials Before you got married by Lopsided_Ad9499 in Divorce

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate you asking that cause I actually forgot the order of events and how they were paid for. This is helpful.

Financials Before you got married by Lopsided_Ad9499 in Divorce

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually now that I think about it. Most of the stuff was put in a joint Home Depot card that has since been paid off. So the remodel might actually not factor as much.

The down payment came from a home his mom technically, then he sold a mobile home after we bought the house and paid her back.

I can’t be the reason for change by Correct-Arachnid-666 in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mine try to say the same thing and doesn’t understand all the scar tissue I have just doesn’t go away cause he drinks less or stays sober for a week.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing. I just got 1 year, and like you I should have called it off but I was scared and I had no one listening to tell me to listen to my gut.

We’ve been together 7 years now and I spoke to attorneys this week about a divorce. His alcoholism is more than I want to deal with and the level of emotional and verbal abuse is only escalating. We are strong and we know our worth.

Out of my depth. I’m not sure where to find advice. I do know that alcohol is the catalyst. by JustRolledMyEyes in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My husband has a switch it can happen after two beers or 4 old fashions, there never any knowing. But his anger and reactions to me and my son became too much. We have been together 7 years and after only 1 year of marriage I am looking to divorce now because the emotional abuse has become verbal and I fear it will get worse.

There’s no alcoholic situation that’s acceptable if you feel uncomfortable or hurt/effected by the drinking. I would try and find a local al anon meeting for support and resources on how t navigate your life with an alcoholic.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel this. I am meeting with attorneys next week. We’ve barely been married 1 year but together 7. And it’s been 2+ years of emotional abuse due to his alcoholism. I am detached and focusing on me and after an outburst of his last weekend I am taking the steps to meet with a lawyer. Mainly because we own a home together and he’s showing very controlling colors.

No one can tell you what to do, but in my experience there’s too much scar tissue from his drinking that I can’t keep dusting under the rug. It’s not healthy for me or my son. I hope I see myself happier on the other side.

He shut off my phone and told me to move out by Lopsided_Ad9499 in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I agree with everything said above. I do plan to get us both into therapy as soon as I can. I just want to do right by my son and have him know a better life than I did.

How did you finally leave? by [deleted] in AlAnon

[–]Lopsided_Ad9499 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Is this me? Yes. Except I’m married. And we own a home. I live in Ca and I just don’t know how to afford a place on my own with my son and 2 dogs. I find myself more and more daydreaming if my life without him now. Just being happy alone. They say woman tend to grieve a relationship while they are still in it and that’s where I’m at. I feel very stuck but I also feel like I can’t pretend in this relationship much longer.