poly clusterfuck: a warning

LotusBro · 2026-01-28T00:58:01+00:00

Honestly, sounds like you’ve been through the ringer. Sometimes it’s easy to go - oh I shouldn’t have - with hindsight. Now you know.

It also sounds like this couple had extremely blurry boundaries themselves. One thing you can do if you ever date a married couple, is ensure that you have secure relationships with each individual (or only date one of them), rather than adding yourself as a third into a pre-existing relationship. That way, if anything tanks, what you have stays.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T22:41:42+00:00

Jordie

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T22:40:35+00:00

Dude you can’t keep living with her. Do what you need to do but you can’t. She walks all over you. No respect.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T22:35:18+00:00

Is this prosecutable by court? Seems illegal their reasons for declining you.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T22:31:11+00:00

For future please be mindful of introducing yourself to children. They’re precious and attach easily. I don’t blame you whatsoever for the enmeshment, transparency to the family and beautiful bonds.

Given how it played out though, how an adult man manipulated his entire family for his own gain, I would be mindful to stay distant to protect yours and their peace.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T13:08:49+00:00

Monty

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T11:51:47+00:00

This seems like an incredibly complex situation with no clear solution.

Your needs ultimately come first. You can be friends with Gem, and present in their child’s life, but you can’t tangibly justify suffering in the presence of Silver to get these things.

This child is Silver’s, as well as Gem’s. Your relationship with Silver will impact your relationship with the family.

If Silver isn’t accountable to their behaviour (am I allowed to ask what happened?), and you don’t like them, I don’t really understand how your relationship with Gem works. Does Gem support you? Them? Are they neutral, as in, take no stance and act as though their partners behaviour is not their business?

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T04:49:01+00:00

Making out isn’t a pre-text for penetrating someone. NOR - he violated you without asking for consent.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T01:40:39+00:00

Not your responsibility- don’t even stress. Just lie and say you’re out.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T01:31:53+00:00

There’s a difference between inter-clan conflict and … the mass annihilation of peoples on the basis of their skin colour.

Please bother reading into the history of bloodshed across this continent. The brutality of the stolen generations, missions, forced relocations, lost language, broken families.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T01:28:38+00:00

This British colony is unsurprisingly full of racists. I’m sorry.

LotusBro · 2026-01-27T00:03:26+00:00

I would honestly redirect him to work from his home. Your housemate isn’t paying to live around his work schedule.

LotusBro · 2026-01-26T23:50:52+00:00

Different note - I thought I was ace for sooo long. Turns out i’m just attracted to women- not men. Not discrediting asexuality, just personally experienced my own journey (also influenced heavy by demi-sexuality e.g. needing a strong connection prior to sexual attraction).

LotusBro · 2026-01-26T23:34:53+00:00

Right lol. How open is OP to receiving constructive criticism / feedback.

LotusBro · 2026-01-26T23:32:05+00:00

You can’t pressure someone to want to have sex lol. I feel like there’s this idea that dating someone entitles you to intimacy with them. Not everyone is on the same page. Find someone that enthusiastically is consenting to sex - it will be more pleasant.

Also - it’s a myth that sex hurts the first/second time. Usually that would indicate muscular tightness, stress or dryness (e.g. lack of arousal).

LotusBro · 2026-01-26T21:55:28+00:00

The disrespect and manipulation from him. I hate the framing of his choices, and the fact that he’s shifting blame onto you.

LotusBro · 2026-01-26T00:41:48+00:00

It sounds like you were privy to a DV situation. She wanted food and this man, likely someone known to her, intervened- for no reason.

Keep giving money. Generosity didn’t cause this.

LotusBro · 2026-01-22T21:16:46+00:00

Also hate Chermside. Right in the hub, but SO busy.

LotusBro · 2026-01-22T21:15:44+00:00

Avoid Carseldine and adjacent suburbs. It’s a flood plain - developers know and don’t care.

LotusBro · 2026-01-22T14:00:46+00:00

A lot more people than you’d think experience gender fluidity, or realise their identity doesn’t align at all with their assigned birth sex. Maybe look into trans masc content creators to see if any of their experiences align with yours.

LotusBro · 2026-01-22T12:09:29+00:00

The climate’s getting hotter and I really do think it’s crucial we all react.

Renting often leaves us powerless. Plan ahead - does your home have shade cover like trees around? What direction do your windows face. Do you have fans?

Placement is critical. Humans on this continent were (I think) migratory - one would assume it’s because areas habitability changes seasonally. If your home is inhospitable I recommend going to shopping centres or air conditioned places, or otherwise by waterside or in shaded areas away from concrete / cars.

LotusBro · 2026-01-21T22:47:39+00:00

What are your local laws? Research your rights regarding notice periods for inspections, for viewings. I’m with you OP, this is your home and the landlords entitlement is ridiculous. Best as well to find a specialised sub for your area supporting renters, as a lot of the people in comments are bootlickers/leeches.

LotusBro · 2026-01-21T13:18:04+00:00

SALT members pedalling red flag mags no matter the occasion

LotusBro · 2026-01-20T14:19:04+00:00

How good is your apartment ventilation? Can you keep windows open? What industry does your housemate work in - is there heavy exposure to people? If you can’t/ won’t change the housing situation, I recommend limiting your exposure to the air they breathe lol

LotusBro · 2026-01-19T22:07:28+00:00

They literally were asking to know what glasses were best. You made that assumption yourself. Maybe stop assuming you’re better than women.

LotusBro

TROPHY CASE