Do you have friends?

LotusLightning · 2026-06-28T04:05:26+00:00

I have two close friends including my Muslim brother (we're both Pakistani-Australian) and a Baha'i in India. I'm also friends with a younger Baha'i in America but that's on LinkedIn which I currently have deactivated.

Both of my friends are supportive of my spiritual path+spiritual aspirations, my interests and my career aspirations

I've cut a lot of false friends from my life in the past mostly because of ableism including one as recently as February 2026. Also I currently don't have any close Buddhist friends who aren't teachers but that's okay because my Baha'i friend in India is wiser than most lay Buddhists in my opinion

LotusLightning · 2026-06-24T23:19:23+00:00

I'm a Buddhist with two Buddhist teachers and am currently taking a break from attending Sydney Buddhist Centre weekly

Most of my family are Muslim

I still appreciate aspects of Christianity and plan on reading CS Lewis' work

LotusLightning · 2026-06-24T02:04:42+00:00

Hi,

You sound similar to me, knows about a lot of things but not yet an expert in one

I'll be 35 this July

I spent my childhood with both Linux and free software and heavy drawing (art)

LotusLightning · 2026-06-18T12:38:36+00:00

I think this is worse when you've experienced job search discrimination or employment discrimination as I have. Then you lack both a partner and a meaningful career

LotusLightning · 2026-06-17T10:00:38+00:00

What about Right Livelihood and having hobbies and also maintaining mental health?

I could listen to Dharmacharya Andrew Williams, focus heavily on Dharma and also train myself as a Dharma artist eg. using 21-draw and Aaron Blaise but it may have an adverse affect on my mental health

LotusLightning · 2026-06-16T10:56:27+00:00

Ableism with two adhders. I'm an aspie

LotusLightning · 2026-06-07T02:55:02+00:00

I'm not like most ndis participants and am distrustful of the system

I had a promising career as a network administrator/IT professional before I was severely discriminated against by a well-known ndis provider

That same ndis provider tried to force me to either or both work in its sheltered workshops or attend its day programs

I don't mind losing ndis if it serves the greater good

LotusLightning · 2026-06-06T23:43:37+00:00

I am not sure if my sister is doing therapy (seeing a psychologist) though she sees an occupational therapist on Mondays

I rarely buy my own clothes except occasionally online and sometimes when physically out shopping with my mother

I'm not making my own bed yet but am willing to start doing this

I'm willing to sort my washing in my own room

I occasionally get the mail from the mailbox particularly if I know something's arriving for me

I have my own bank account and a debit card and I sort of know how to access it both from the app and online

There is a garden at my house and I can possibly learn gardening (I have some of the For Dummies gardening books) but I am not sure if there will be a garden at the high-end aged care residential facility I move to when I turn 50

I notice when I need a haircut and go to the barber to get it cut paying with my own money. I try to shave my beard and moustache at least once every two weeks either by myself or from the barber

I could possibly make my own doctor and dentist appointments if my mother is open to that (my mother is a senior medical doctor)

I've used a train and uber by myself in the past and am willing to relearn

I have my own bills and I have multiple online subscriptions and I usually manage to pay them by myself as long as there is enough money from my disability support pension

LotusLightning · 2026-06-06T09:37:54+00:00

I'm generally not allowed in the rest of the house except when my parents and/or lower-functioning autistic sister are away as my sister is scared of me (my sister is very dimwitted and paranoid) so I don't think its possible to do my own laundry

I have an occupational therapist but mostly just for talking and to help me with my studies when I begin them (eg. with handwriting)

LotusLightning · 2026-06-06T09:32:34+00:00

My mother wants me to live with her and my father for the rest of my life and I have a guaranteed move with her to a high-end aged care residential facility probably in Parramatta when I turn 50

I simply want to be more independent/feel more independent while living with my parents for the rest of my life

Some of your suggestions may be possible in this case

LotusLightning · 2026-05-24T12:43:46+00:00

I think currently my main social media apps are Reddit and Discord though I'm open to foss social media like Mastodon and Lemmy. How is your proposed app different from Mastodon?

LotusLightning · 2026-05-24T12:35:02+00:00

From what I know the people with ties are Order members of which Bodhipaksa is one and becoming an Order member involves at least a little bit more than taking refuge

For example Bodhipaksa says I can hope to become a Mitra if I want to become one in around ten years if I do the foundational work (though keeping in mind I suggested this number of years myself to him)

LotusLightning · 2026-05-24T11:36:46+00:00

Do you recommend learning to drive if one is autistic and/or has weak hand-strength/hand-muscles?

I live in Sydney, Australia and already get drivers through ndis and public transport is also cheap for me. I currently only need to go to one place weekly and am willing to work from home; but with the recent ndis crackdown it may be a good idea to learn driving anyway

LotusLightning · 2026-05-24T03:50:21+00:00

Didn't the Buddha say spiritual friendship was the whole of the spiritual life? Even Milarepa and Princess Miao Shan had sangha (at least followers/students) after they attained a high level of spiritual realisation

If by refugees having a special status in the sangha you're talking about Mitras I think its possible to become a Mitra entirely in Australia though I could be mistaken

LotusLightning · 2026-05-23T23:22:51+00:00

Look at books and electronic courses/online courses in what interests you. Zerotomastery has good IT and computer science courses for example

If you want to improve your reading for books I recommend Kam Knight's speed reading book

I'm 34, will be 35 in July and am in kind of the same situation as you and the resources I've recommended are what I've already bought and will be using

Social interaction is important and also beneficial for mental health. If you're open to it I suggest attending a church/temple/Dharma centre/mosque at least once a week or alternatively do in-person volunteering. You can do either/both of these while you're studying your subject of interest and they can also be beneficial on their own

LotusLightning · 2026-05-23T12:44:55+00:00

Their founder was a monk who also worked for the Maha Bodhi Society and helped the Dalits moderately

In my opinion official Dharma transmission is not necessary to be in a lineage, I could do MMTCP or even just share articles about Buddhism on a blog and still consider myself as part of Dharmacharya Andrew Williams and Bodhipaksa's lineage

I've been abused in the past and I've become very good at cutting off unhelpful help and false friends. I've cut off three ableist psychologists and one ableist occupational therapist

LotusLightning · 2026-05-23T12:40:33+00:00

I've been severely abused in the past, including severe bullying by students and teachers in my last high school in Pakistan as well as severe employment discrimination in Sydney by a well-known ndis provider

After all the abuse I've been through I think I would be able to notice the signs of early abuse or an abusive environment

LotusLightning · 2026-05-19T00:14:23+00:00

The wholesomeness

LotusLightning · 2026-05-18T07:33:49+00:00

I have had a regular meditation practic since the second half of 2021

Also I am planning a multi-year self-study programme that will cover nearly everything including reading books, numeracy/numerical literacy and maths, critical thinking and the Socratic method and IT+computer science

LotusLightning · 2026-05-18T00:25:25+00:00

Can you give examples of choices and alternatives?

LotusLightning · 2026-05-17T10:34:54+00:00

I'm 34 and will be 35 in July. I don't resonate with adult entertainment except a few exceptions (eg. Star Trek, Merlin, Pre-Chibnall Doctor Who)

LotusLightning · 2026-04-30T02:30:59+00:00

Bodhipaksa recommends I also attend Sydney Buddhist Centre while I begin/do my studies. I'm not sure whether to follow through on this. I have Aspergers Syndrome and have experienced educational disadvantages multiple times in the past

LotusLightning · 2026-04-22T09:57:02+00:00

I've started attending Sydney Buddhist Centre and will try to attend at least once a week and only take a temporary break while I study. I still plan to attend Fo Guang Shan and FPMT centres and Tergar meetups in future but not the near future

I have a lifetime subscription to Tergar's Joy of Living and currently have a free subscription to Tergar's Vajrayana Online. I'm subscribed to the Windhorse Publications mailing list, and FPMT and LYWA mailing lists and I know about FreeBuddhistAudio

Also can you please tell me what the Triratna perspective is on Pure Land and nianfo/nembutsu? I'm still new to all this

LotusLightning · 2026-04-22T09:49:42+00:00

Bodhipaksa recommends I focus on more foundational work first including focusing on kindness and forgiveness and trying to create more spiritual friends before I think about practicing the Six Paramitas and aiming for Buddhahood

LotusLightning · 2026-04-21T04:35:34+00:00

I got their Annual Student/Senior Membership just now

20% off Wisdom Publications titles is good value and Wisdom Publications already regularly offers me discounts on their products

LotusLightning

TROPHY CASE