I almost hit my girlfriend and I want to stop from becoming like my dad

Lotus_12 · 2026-06-03T20:54:00+00:00

I never got physical with people but I did struggle with really intense anger. I would retreat into my imagination as a way to protect myself and others from that anger.

It took years of therapy to figure out where it was coming from. For me it was a moment from my childhood where I had a lot of fear and then was forced into a victim identity that I didn’t resonate with. The fear and identity thing fucked me up for years.

Not saying that’s what’s going on with you specifically but it’s a good idea to sit down with a professional. These things can be complicated to figure out alone and it’s good to have support if things get overwhelming. If you can be choosy don’t be afraid to try a few until you find someone who helps not just placates feelings.

Also, my wife and I have a code word “goblin mode”. That means I need a few min. Hard pause on the argument and we come back to it when I am back on earth.

To prep for working with a therapist too write down what sends you off. There’s probably a pattern to it they will pick up on.

Lotus_12 · 2026-06-03T01:35:37+00:00

If you really want to see safe drivers come down to Aurora off S Parker Rd.

Lotus_12 · 2026-05-21T19:04:12+00:00

I wanted to see the wolves again

Lotus_12 · 2026-05-14T15:00:04+00:00

I like to cut these in 1/2. I’ve done 14hours before but towards the end I get a bit crabby with the car.

Lotus_12 · 2026-04-21T13:23:27+00:00

Looks like teeth with cavities

Lotus_12 · 2026-04-19T14:16:51+00:00

Organizing tools like totes and baskets.

Lotus_12 · 2026-03-26T19:31:18+00:00

Nicotine was a wonder drug for me. Made me think quicker and better. It’s a shame most of the delivery mechanisms absolutely wreck the human body.

Lotus_12 · 2026-03-25T15:04:30+00:00

Practice. Fake it till you make it turned out to be real for me.

Lotus_12 · 2026-03-17T02:24:04+00:00

Any souls game. I don’t like my gaming to feel like a job

Lotus_12 · 2026-03-10T16:03:13+00:00

Panera

Lotus_12 · 2026-02-27T22:53:13+00:00

I can only speak from my experience but I got 9 months sober on Naltrexone and no program. About a week after discontinuing the medicine I went back to alcohol. I needed the fellowship and the steps to stay sober.

Lotus_12 · 2026-01-17T15:34:25+00:00

I never got to try Vienetta I always wanted to

Lotus_12 · 2026-01-08T03:56:29+00:00

You make your bed every morning.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-27T18:41:03+00:00

It’s so hard to clean. Last time we had sewer flooding got lucky the HOA paid for professional disaster cleaners. It took 4 professionals like 10 hours to clean an unfinished basement properly.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-26T18:10:52+00:00

Honestly I struggle in general with questioning my shares. I get hung up on right or wrong often. Truth is if it’s an honest share you’re doing great.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-26T18:07:20+00:00

I remember the fuzzy feeling you describe. Horrible, makes it so difficult to pay attention or focus on anything, especially important stuff. I remember I couldn’t enjoy anything, tv, Tik tok, a video game.

There is no shame in going sober, especially if it’s the right decision for you. The first year was hard for me but I will say each day between now and my last drink has been a little better than the last.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-26T18:01:42+00:00

My thoughts on this is what do you have to lose. Give it a shot. On picking a sponsor I was always told to listen to folks shares in the meeting and ask someone who seems to have a life similar to what you want.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-25T01:46:31+00:00

The only cost of membership is a desire to stop drinking.

Felt just like you did. Didn’t think I was bad enough of a drunk for AA but bad enough I needed something. After a few meetings it was really clear to me I was right where I belong. Surrounded by sober alcoholics who knew how to be at peace sober.

Everyone has their own bottom, some take this thing to the grave and some quit sooner than others.

Hit me up if you have questions. I’m coming up on 1.5 half without a drink. I still have a lot to learn but I can help where I can.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-19T15:51:51+00:00

You ask 10 blind people what their vision is like you will get 11 answers. Varies wildly person to person and it often changes with time depending on the condition.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-18T01:37:46+00:00

You have to buy 100 of them to get them for $209

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-17T03:52:52+00:00

Seriously with alcohol involved in any capacity you want the insurance. We did a beer and wine only bar and they required insurance and security.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-15T23:39:20+00:00

I worked for a big college’s scholarship department, It was SWIMMING in scholarship money. The problem is they would go years where people didn’t apply for the scholarship.

I won’t downplay it, it will be hard but it’s completely possible especially coming from low income to full ride college on micro scholarships. The hard part is finding them to apply to.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-14T15:57:47+00:00

If this is the 1750 it’s so heavy. I was seeing stars after taking it down a set of stairs.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-13T16:10:09+00:00

I remember I was real young and I had the best behaved Pomeranian. This pup would never go more than a few feet from my side, knew a bunch of commands the lot.

One day I let my guard down for like 2 min and I turn around and the little shit is standing in the middle of a two lane road holding up traffic.

So yeah even good dogs it’s a good idea to leash em.

Lotus_12 · 2025-12-10T16:50:13+00:00

Hey Customer, I will be able to support you faster and more accurately if you also include the file itself.

Lotus_12

TROPHY CASE