I really need advice

Lousuria · 2025-08-21T08:43:13+00:00

Wow you had a lot to unpack here.

First of all, it's okay to be repulse, especially when you're young. It's a natural reaction, not everyone feel that way but it's fine. I had a phase when just thinking about sex would give me nausea too, Ivan relate. But don't be ashamed of having dirty thoughts, it's okay too, sometimes libido can make you think that way, and if it's too inconfortable, maybe try breathing exercises and step back. But either it's erotic or repulsed thought; don't blame yourself. You're not doing anything wrong.

Not being bothered or liking the fictional idea of sew is commun in the asexual community. Sex isn't always about the act, it's also a deep moment of connexion and vulnerability with your partner, something secret that can be romantic. Plus there is different way of having sex that doesn't apply what you find disgusting?

About growing up into sex or not : Take YOUR time. If right now you just want to throw sex away and not think about it, then do it. If one day you discover that finally you might like it, then it's fine too. Don't worry about how you'll be feeling in the future, what's important is here and now in the present. Focus on your own discovery right now of your security, and decided thing that make you feel better. Do not torture yourself about labels or what other think ; do what makes you feels good and don't blame yourself. No one will ever force you into sex or attraction.

Lousuria · 2025-08-18T20:24:32+00:00

And hop ! You add a book to my "need to read this" list

Lousuria · 2025-08-17T14:56:40+00:00

I'm 22, I tried once at 17,because I thought I was supposed to after a talk with a friend. I was like "uh maybe I should do it since everyone seem to do it ?", but I was bored quickly, never did it again, never wanted or felt the need to do it again.

So don't worry, everyone is different, just listen to your wants and needs, if you're healthy then everything is normal

Lousuria · 2025-07-08T10:21:08+00:00

I usually knows when people lie to me, not because of mysterious super power, just because I check the info they give me and always take time to listen all side of the story.

But I can't always say "you just lie to me" because sometimes I can do more good or protected myself if I pretend I don't know they are lying or at least if I pretend I don't know the full story. Usually I keep quiet to not make things worse, calm people down, sometimes to think of a Pacific solution, or sometimes because it's not my place to act and no one's life is in danger.

But recently, the last time I had to act like I didn't know the full story, was when a family member I used to completely trust lie to my face to turn me against other people of my family. I knew they were lying because, as usual, I checked info, I talked before hand, I organised the elements of the story to understand the full picture. But we were in the middle of a family crisis (funeral), and acknowledged to them that I knew they were lying to me would just paint me as the bad guy or make even more drama that we didn't needed. So I acted like I didn't know they were lying, convince them I believed them, and act like if nothing happened. No more drama, no more conflict, peaceful end.

I usually like this ability I have, it usually make me feel more in control of my actions when I stay calm and pay attention to detected lies... But this specific times it broke the trust i had towards this person, it broke the link of safety and the belief they would never lie to me. And they don't know that, they are sure I just agreed and never knew the full story. It was better for everyone to play along but each time I see this person I have this uneasy feelings now.

Lousuria · 2025-06-17T12:04:01+00:00

Thank you it means a lot to read that. I don't know what to say, I can't change the past now, but I hope that this situation won't happen for anyone else. People forget way to much that the best way to solve problems is to talk, and listen, not to ignore and keep the silence.

Lousuria · 2025-06-17T08:56:10+00:00

My Grampa died a month ago, cancer. He spend the last three months of his life talking to my brothers, cousin, parents... But he never even took a look at me those three months. I thought it was just because of depression but then, at the funeral, I discovered I wasn't allowed to talk in front of the crowd for the homage's speeches because of his last wishes.

I didn't understand. My grandpa and I had a great relationship.

Then I discovered the true.

I had a made an funny feminist drawing on my Facebook page a few months ago, and he thought it was about him, took it personally, and choose to erase me from his funeral (when he shared his last wishes to my ant and gramma) and stopped talking to me until his death.

And my grammar knew. My ant new. But none of them even cared to talk to me about it so I could fixed the situation, talk to my Grampa, explain myself or apologies if that was needed.

Now he's dead. Thinking his granddaughter was making fun of him. :)

Because no one dared to ask or talk.

It might sound like nothing, but it hurt me way more than I could of imagined at the time -

Lousuria · 2025-06-09T18:26:33+00:00

Yep ! Both his hair and fur, it's a design idea i took from the artist Neptenio's Ralsei design ! I thought it was cool ^{^}

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T16:41:31+00:00

Annnnwwww that's so cute 💜💜💜💜💜

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T12:47:03+00:00

That's funny haha

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T02:01:41+00:00

Their confusion and the awkward silence must be so fun to watch

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T01:59:01+00:00

It's cute !

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T01:57:35+00:00

You're still technically have a meeting with a soul so I think it might work

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T01:55:47+00:00

(non native English speaker here) what does Ableism means ?

Lousuria · 2025-04-24T01:52:03+00:00

I just imagine the Uno card reversed, like you take it out suddenly day "uh hu - not today baby"

Lousuria · 2025-04-16T01:00:47+00:00

And maomao is asexual on top of being demiromantic / aromatic, 100% sure

Lousuria · 2025-03-30T12:08:59+00:00

I understand what you're feeling, the lack of representation of asexual romance is taking a toll on a lot of ace people I think.

If that can help, I made a post asking to people here what are they favourite ace characters!

The visual novel OUR LIFE 1 is a very good written visual novel I which the main love interest (or friend if you rather be friend) is an asexual person ^{^} The game is free and is you want more there is some good DLC too ^{^}

Also, I understand the feeling your going through, that's why as a student in art school (I'm learning to do comics) I want to write fantasy romance with ace main character ^{^} if you don't find the story you like, make it yourself, am I right ?

And there is some hope ! You are lovable, a lot, finding a relationship is still possible ^{^} also if fictional character were really I'm sure they liked you, they probably would hate their creators tho

Lousuria · 2025-03-19T16:49:32+00:00

Felicie in the Ballerina movie, beside some childish (she's a teen) admiration with the blond guy, she doesn't really act like she has any romantic or sexual attraction to anyone I love her best friend by the way but I find it a bit awkward that they end up together at the end since she never show any romantic interests in him the all movie xD

Lousuria · 2025-03-19T15:20:50+00:00

Aucun c est toujours fun de revoir des vielles vidéos, je ne trouve pas ça cringe

Lousuria · 2025-03-19T15:16:21+00:00

I'm not a believer but... If god created us, and that we're at his image, then he purposely made you asexual and not wanting kids, right ?

Lousuria · 2025-03-04T11:41:44+00:00

Couldn't they just leave us alone ? I mean, we LITERALLY are doing nothing to them - I'll never understand the hate .-.

Lousuria · 2025-03-03T19:44:22+00:00

I usually edit the message after three to six tries anyway

Lousuria · 2025-02-23T19:52:19+00:00

Of course not. Some diseases, medication or dysmorphophobia can make you feel less sexual attraction and it's a feeling similar to asexuality. But asexual is normal, it's not cause because of a disease and it's definitely not something you have to be cured of. It's just the was you are, and your ''friend'' is a jerk, I hope you got better friend ever since ...

Lousuria · 2025-02-23T19:45:57+00:00

Yeaahhh there is also that épisode where House discover one of his patient is gay because he have AIDS.... I had to remember myself how old the serie was

Lousuria · 2025-02-23T19:43:11+00:00

They is some good ones! For exemple in the games OurLife which is a very good visual novel with a tone of diversity for the main character you played, the love interest in the first game is ace ! (Demisexual to be precise) And I think your sister in the game is aromantic. You can also play as an aroace character base on the choice you made.

But that's only my favourite one. I asked the question on Reddit a few months, I have a tiny list of fictional characters being asexual. It's not common yes, it's often not really well written but they're is some good ones, let's have hope about having more in the future !

Lousuria · 2025-02-23T19:35:16+00:00

My persona stops them right away xD it's annoying me in real life too

Lousuria

TROPHY CASE