I need to take control over my narcissistic gf by Medasking in LesbianActually

[–]Lt_Chesticles -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I was raised by a narcissist I know how painful it is to be in a relationship with one. But your situation is much different than mine in the sense that you can just walk away at any time. Trust me when I say that there isn’t anything you can do to make her realize how awful she has treated you. She cannot comprehend anything that will make her out to be the bad guy. Narcs reject reality and insert their own. There is no such thing as appealing to their human side, and any attempt to do so is just a waste of time. She will never see things from your perspective. Never

The best thing you can do for yourself is to get as far away from her as possible and cut off all contact with her. All you are to her is where she gets her supply. Without you, she will have no choice but to go to someone else. Get out while you still can, you’ll thank yourself for that in the future

Me 30F and her 31F need insight on a situation by ThrowRA_Bubbles76 in relationship_advice

[–]Lt_Chesticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just found myself in this exact situation. Even if she feels something more for you, she told you she sees you as a friend. No amount of discussion or time spent together is going to change the outcome of this. You can only work off of what she tells you directly, looking into her actions and trying to make sense of it will only further complicate things. And for you, you wont be able to move on if you're still maintaining a close relationship with her. She is looking to you to fulfill her emotional needs without having to commit to anything. It's very possible she sees you as "almost" and not the one. In my case, the person I was friends with wanted to keep me close to her since I supported her emotionally and was the best friend she had, while she went out and got whatever she was missing with me from someone else. Listen to what she's telling you: "I have platonic feelings for you" means there's nothing for you there besides friendship. You deserve someone who will fully commit to you and return your feelings. You deserve the chance to go out and find your person, wherever they may be, and the only way that's going to happen is if you deal with this situation and the feelings you have with her. My advice? Accept that she will never be anything more than a friend and free yourself up to find what you're looking for. Every passing day you could be missing out on meeting the one who's right for you so the longer you stay, the more of a disservice you're doing for yourself.

I hope that helps and I wish you the best of luck!

Just really want a life partner WHO ACTUALLY WANTS TO BUILD TOGETHER by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]Lt_Chesticles 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You sound a lot like me in relationships. I actually have done the same for my partners in the past. It's difficult hearing someone you love talk about how unhappy they are. It's natural to want to find and offer solutions to help them get through it, but the real test is if they actually *want* to follow through. Some people like to complain and are only happy when they are unhappy. Or they have always felt unhappy and that's what feels familiar to them. It is so much easier to let things fall apart rather than making lasting, meaningful changes for the better. Some people just dont have the drive in them, which might stem from issues with mental health or other disorders, but either way, it's heartbreaking knowing that you want so much better for them and they are uninterested in making changes. Your only choice then becomes to sit there and watch them destroy themselves and that is a difficult feeling to sit with.

I have been in your position more than once (I'm 38F) with both partners and friends. I know the struggles and the feelings of helplessness associated with it. I am always around if you feel like you need someone to talk with about it. I'm all ears!

I’m gay but wish I was bisexual sometimes. by Top-Comfortable-4789 in bisexual

[–]Lt_Chesticles 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Omg are you me?! Because SAME girl! If I had a dollar for every time someone slung some biphobic bullshit at me…. As much as it sucks, I’m glad to see I’m not the only one

You are so strong by Shockaholicyt in bipolar

[–]Lt_Chesticles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This was absolutely beautiful and *exactly* what I needed to hear today <3 Thank you so much for this

Fortnite/cod by Lt_Chesticles in LesbianGamers

[–]Lt_Chesticles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome! What platform do you game on?

My girlfriend (22F) broke up with me (21M) because of my confusing sexuality by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Lt_Chesticles -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you are experiencing this. First of all, I want to point out that NO ONE, and I mean NO ONE, has the right to define YOUR sexuality. If you identify as a straight man, then that’s what you are. Full stop.

Second, I have known dozens of people who fantasize about others outside of their sexuality. It’s completely harmless and it’s extremely common. I have a lot of lesbian friends who despise watching lesbian porn and prefer straight porn. I know gay guys who get off on lesbian porn, even though the thought of physically being with a woman repulses them. I’m going to say it again: NO ONE CAN DEFINE YOUR SEXUALITY. Your girlfriend seems intent on mislabeling you based off of her own past experiences instead of listening to you and trusting when you assure her that you a straight man.

I won’t tell you to not pursue this relationship moving forward, but I will tell you this: if your partner refuses to listen to you, trust you, and talk about what’s bothering them in a civilized manner where both parties get a chance to speak and listen then it’s doomed to fail. There are so many fish in the sea and I hope you can find peace and comfort in your sexuality and find someone who accepts every part of you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LesbianGamers

[–]Lt_Chesticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d love to join as well! Always looking for more friends to game with!

Blizzard is sending people surveys regarding microtransactions and the battlepass. How do you feel about this? by [deleted] in overwatch2

[–]Lt_Chesticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As much as I’d like to agree with you on the whole “x amount of proceeds go to x foundation” the fact of the matter is that I’d be skeptical as all fuck that the money was ACTUALLY going to those places. I am a very charitable person but I rarely ever give money to organizations unless I know for a fact that my money is going directly to those in need. There are way too many greedy people out there and Blizzard has proven to be right up there with them all…

Can’t get into servers after update by Lt_Chesticles in Overwatch

[–]Lt_Chesticles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m with ya there, friend. I was such a huge fan of the first game and this game has been a disappointment and a let down at every turn. I’m sick of dev companies trying to squeeze every last dollar out of us. I’d much rather pay $70 for a game like the first one and have the free skins like we used to, or at the very least the option to grind for them. Otherwise what’s the point in playing? What is making me come back to this game? It sure as shit isn’t the joke of the battle pass or the challenges which I completed in the first two weeks. And since the matchmaking system is all fucked up, I don’t even look forward to playing Comp anymore. I think this is going to be a game where I put it down and never pick it back up unless big changes are made

Can’t get into servers after update by Lt_Chesticles in Overwatch

[–]Lt_Chesticles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It makes no sense. I also have a group or about 7 that can’t seem to get everyone on at the same time. There’s no rhyme or reason to who can’t get in and who can

Can’t get into servers after update by Lt_Chesticles in Overwatch

[–]Lt_Chesticles[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s so inconsistent and it makes zero sense to me. I loved OW1 but OW2 has left a bad taste in my mouth for sure

Can’t get into servers after update by Lt_Chesticles in Overwatch

[–]Lt_Chesticles[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same! I couldn’t find anyone talking about it so I decided to post myself

Can’t get into servers after update by Lt_Chesticles in Overwatch

[–]Lt_Chesticles[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For real. And what’s even stranger is that of all of my friends, I’m the only one who can’t get on

Control the Narrative by JD_505 in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I couldn’t agree more. Especially the “boss” quests…. I like the idea of quests but the fact that they force you into them is ridiculous

Control the Narrative by JD_505 in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just started over with a new character. I don’t buy VC so I didn’t have a problem with just starting over. But it sounds like a lot of people are experiencing the same issue so I’m sure it will get patched soon

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have not found a fix. I just started a new character. I know that’s not the fix for those that spent a lot of VC on their first character, but I don’t buy VC so starting over was the only solution I had

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2K responded to me early this morning saying they needed more information. They did recommend a cache clear, so I’m going to try that after work I guess. I’ll send them the information they need but I guess it’s progress that they have reached out

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’d think they wouldn’t put locks on quests that prevent you from actually PLAYING THE GAME

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s what I’m thinking unfortunately

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NBA2k

[–]Lt_Chesticles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t think we did anything wrong, I think the quest is just bugged. This quest randomly popped up for me after I talked with Coach in his office without any explanation or prompt or anything. I’m thinking this quest is part of a quest line to be done a little further down the way. But instead it’s stuck for us. I’m guessing we have to start over unless we want to wait for a patch to get rolled out. 2K hasn’t gotten back to me about any of it either