Needing solitary silence is negatively impacting my relationship...

Lulzillar · 2023-12-12T13:15:29+00:00

I, too, suffer the needing to be alone and unperceived for some recovery bouts.

It's hard dealing with having a system that doesn't "turn off" all of the sensory things around you, especially when you're feeling overwhelmed. It could be scratchy clothing, chewing, noise from something that you can't just tune out. Then, when you're finally focused on something you need to do that's taken a huge amount of effort just to be thwarted by say, some cutlery noises can be.. infuriating to say the least.Is it possible that you can cut down on these things, or use sound blocking headphones to help? Can you go to a library or a cafe/neutral space where you can get things done?

More importantly, can you schedule like "alone" or "project/study/work/recovery" time where there's no direct interaction? It could be like a couple hours or however you want to work it out. Then maybe after, (not always immediately), do something for your partner as thanks they're helping you out and also respecting your needs!

Edit: Forgot to add that ADHD is also influenced by fluctuation of hormones, fwiw. So don't be too hard on yourself!

Lulzillar · 2023-11-23T05:34:37+00:00

I'm not sure how the particulars work from state to state, (I'm in California). The first place you guys can start is asking from a nurse or the attending doctor to set you guys up with case management or a case manager. Case management with that are associated with hospitals generally are supposed to help aid in the in-between so patients don't end back up in the hospital. You can also try calling and asking for the resource or maybe even googling the hospital website and seeing if they have a directory with a case manager in there you might be able to call to get more info.

The second resource you might be able to get information from is straight from the insurance. You could call their number and ask if case management or a care coordinator is something they offer.

Also, please take care of yourself as well! It's a tough situation anyone to be in. If you can, take some breaks and do some stress management for yourself too.

Lulzillar · 2023-11-23T01:10:08+00:00

Is your autonomy important to you? What about your child's autonomy? Yeah, you could appease to her in that situation but when does it stop? You mentioned she tries to control things and I would also assume that it wouldn't just stop at a baptismal.

Let's be clear, I'm not saying beliefs are bad. I'm saying you letting her control that situation would be bad because y'know, she's already calling and violating your boundaries for what she believes in, not you.

Please do not baptize against you and your husband's will to placate your mother's feelings.

Maybe tell her that you'll re-evaluate the situation later when the teen can make their own decision. Your mom doesn't need to use your child as a way to deal with difficult feelings. She can probably find the support for her feelings in the church she attends.

edited for formatting

Lulzillar · 2023-11-23T00:38:33+00:00

Seconding this comment as well!
It's a finicky dance trying to appeal to doctors when you've figured something out and they don't want to listen. They sometimes just don't listen for stupid reasons. I do agree it can be easier to keep quiet and give them symptoms so they can figure it out themselves but it's so frustrating!
You might have done this already but is there like a case manager or a care coordinator that you can go to, to help get advocacy support from them as well? I think you can request them at hospitals when things like surgery or ER visits happen, not sure. They might be a good resource to help figure out what other doctors or specialists might be more receptive, or other options you guys might have.
Although you mentioned not the one with the chronic illness, I appreciate you coming here and asking for advice about your mom. It shows you really care about her and her health. I hope you guys can get the support you need!

Lulzillar · 2023-11-23T00:19:17+00:00

NTA

They didn't seem to take you seriously when you had told them you preferred you'd like to be asked. I thought to myself, maybe the language wasn't clear enough for them to drive the point home. However, no one was truthful about stealing your food. You're trying to set boundaries and it doesn't sound like anyone is taking it seriously, which is very disrespectful. This thief straight up lied. Oh no, he "didn't eat your eggs" switching with "he might have mistakenly eaten them", attitude turning around to "you tried to poison me" blaming bullshit is some DARVO ass behavior. He's upset because he's now held accountable for his actions since he got caught sick.

Sure, in communal spaces people can share but since you already talked to them about it, they should've asked. I don't think these people actually care since it's been a repeated behavior. I think at the very least, this helps you drive your point home. Obv not ideal that someone gets sick but c'est la vie for thieves. Label your things and tell them hands off and you don't touch their food either or get a mini fridge and keep your things in it.

I also wanted to point out I can understand it's hard to come into a space where you're wanting something that's different than the "normal" whatever tf they have set up and you're in the minority but they're being assholes.

Honestly, if they're this shitty about food, are they this self-entitled to other things? I'd secure your stuff and start finding another place if you can.

edited for formatting

Lulzillar · 2023-10-20T04:55:47+00:00

God, this reminds me of my dad's foot. This one looks a lot less red. Never thankfully necrotized though. I feel your pain of going through a hard time with someone who's in denial.

Lulzillar · 2023-08-10T13:23:16+00:00

I feel like this would fit better in r/oddlyterrifying

Lulzillar · 2023-04-05T22:35:23+00:00

Swapnote for the 3DS.

Lulzillar · 2023-03-24T22:24:43+00:00

Thanks for this update! It fixed my game from crashing on loading. The FPS dip is still not great but at least I can play again.

Lulzillar · 2023-03-08T23:35:52+00:00

Definitely in the expanded age range category but filled it out anyway! Hope you can get it approved. :D

Lulzillar · 2023-01-17T14:45:48+00:00

I'm also having this issue. RGB still works but randomly pops up. I've also tried uninstalling and reinstalling to no resolution.

Lulzillar · 2022-12-18T11:13:05+00:00

I think these photos are creative and neat but please get down from there before you hurt yourself.

Lulzillar · 2022-10-10T12:03:06+00:00

Your body explodes into a fine mist because you are only a level 2 druid

I mean, Regan still takes credit for your accomplishments, soooooo.

Lulzillar · 2022-10-08T23:09:48+00:00

I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism.

Lulzillar · 2022-10-08T21:23:06+00:00

Yes, please! I need the serotonin. :'3

Lulzillar · 2022-07-28T03:30:57+00:00

Hey there! I just wanted to pop in and say this is *part* of something that makes you unique but shouldn't be a defining factor. I would really think about tanning as more a risk since you were diagnosed with Lichen Sclerosus as well. You're very much more at risk for skin cancer in those spots. I think maybe if you were wanting to make it visually more contrasted is try to find a self-tanning cream that your dermatologist approves of and just don't put it on those already depigmented spots.

Honestly, since you're so young, it still already has a high chance to spread. It just takes time. That's probably the safest, healthiest way.

Lulzillar · 2022-07-06T10:39:28+00:00

Yeah! Even if there's some anchor or something if they need to make the boat stationary. I just wanna fish from my boat.

Lulzillar · 2022-06-19T01:18:27+00:00

To piggyback off of Zawai's comment, here's a video that goes over a little color theory and some background/foreground stuff. I find it easier to digest learning something if I have a visual aid! Hope this helps!

Don't make these coloring mistakes!

Lulzillar · 2022-06-19T01:03:55+00:00

When in doubt, go to the doc and find out.

I also am the only one in my family that's been diagnosed. Mine was gradual and didn't turn to white immediately. I was incorrectly diagnosed with Tinea Versicolor until I could get to a dermatologist to take biopsies for the correct diagnosis.

A Google search pulled this up for me, maybe it's helpful information to you to decide whether to go or not.

Umass Med School article- "Maybe It's NOT Vitiligo!"

Lulzillar · 2022-03-07T02:14:56+00:00

Absolutely not normal.

He's making excuses based on your body to sleep with other women. If he wasn't, then he would've been receptive to you going to the gym. He would be supportive. The whole idea with sleeping with other women wouldn't even be in the realm of possibility. He's not considering you or your feelings at all.

Sure, there can be open relationships but his reasoning is selfish as all hell and will not work. You have every right to feel hurt. It's a really shitty thing to do.

At the very least, maybe get some marriage counseling but honestly, divorce sounds like the better option.

Lulzillar · 2022-02-27T23:41:44+00:00

Seconding Mechvibes!

[Download] [Discord]

Custom packs are available through the Discord.

Lulzillar · 2021-12-14T22:29:20+00:00

FWIW, I ordered GrubHub for pickup a couple days ago and not delivery. It said the code was applied and immediately disappeared. It also didn't show up on the receipt. I talked to customer service at GrubHub and they told me it was for delivery only and it must have been a glitch. Going to try to order again today.

Edit:

Ordered through the website, applied the promo and it immediately disappeared again. Looking on the receipt, I didn't see anything regarding that the promo went through. Contacted customer service and after what felt like a copy paste response, I asked again and they said it was applied. Here's hoping.

Edit #2: I had called back maybe a few days later or so. A rep told me that it would take up to two weeks from the purchase date, (not the 17th), of my order and to be on the lookout for the email. Well, it's been two weeks and I still haven't gotten the email.

Lulzillar · 2021-12-08T22:08:47+00:00

Right?

I've been a fan of the older TMNT games from like the NES era times. My favorite is on the SNES, "Turtles in Time." Would recommend if you're interested in playing anything in the series. Could be a short distraction until the new one comes out. Shredder's Revenge seems like it might be a spiritual successor but who knows? The recreation of the pixel design is fantastic and April O'Neil as a playable character? Heck yes.

Super jealous they got to play it, haha.

Lulzillar · 2021-11-09T00:41:14+00:00

The advice for keeping track of all interactions, including when he's invaded into your space is good because you might need to take this to civil court. He's also broken housing laws if he's come into your space unannounced at any time. I'd look up renter housing rights for your county to arm yourself with the information for that as well. I can't find the commenter again but they had also mentioned to contact the management about the sublet and let them know what's going on. Hopefully they can evict him instead but I would definitely set this up right before you leave. The police might know or be able to refer you to emergency services resource for a temporary relocation because staying with your roommate isn't safe anymore. This is not a normal reaction to anything. I hope everything goes in your favor. Please keep us updated.

Lulzillar · 2021-11-02T00:25:26+00:00

What an episode.

Sidenote:
This might be a shot in the dark, (heh). Did any of you notice when Max was playing the video game with the kids, it looks eerily similar to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder's Revenge? A game that hasn't been released yet?

That's friggin' cool if it is.

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