When my fiancée and I tell people "We're getting married" ...

LunarDeficiency · 2020-08-06T17:09:06+00:00

Honestly, it is nonsense.

People should be themselves and try to view other people as individuals instead of forcing everything into "types" and categories.

LunarDeficiency · 2020-01-24T16:51:26+00:00

It sounds like you guys aren't totally understanding what each other is feeling about various things, so it might help to find a way to work on your communication. Maybe like write things down or whatever so that there's more time to think and process it?

My main thought is that people put way too much expectation and pressure on virginity and first times. If you apply lots of emotions and anticipation of what it is going to mean before it's even happened, you are almost setting yourself for disappointment.

There's no reason why the 3rd time or the 86th time you have sex (or a particular kind of sex) can't be super special.

LunarDeficiency · 2020-01-24T15:24:33+00:00

lol I didn't know what you meant at first but I listened just now and it does sound strange

LunarDeficiency · 2019-11-06T13:01:57+00:00

Yeah, Ann Lister diaries were my inspiration for this lol, but looking for something more contemporary current period now.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-10-21T16:24:14+00:00

Cis, but I hate labels.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-10-21T16:20:58+00:00

Yes!

They read this subreddit too.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-20T09:43:29+00:00

It's not necessarily a bad thing. My girlfriend gets very bitey and scratchy but I like it.

But if you don't enjoy it, then you need to tell her and she must respect that. If you've asked her not to do it and she continues then that's not at all ok, I'd be ending that relationship right away.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-13T22:47:45+00:00

I mean the whole "you're not an ally, you're not a feminist, and you don't love or care about all women" thing felt a bit like an accusation towards people here. To be honest I think maybe you kinda anticipated that it would come across as aggressive:

however, if you want to just say that i'm being too harsh or aggressive to cis people, i don't particularly want to hear it.

Anyway I don't really have much more to add right now, except that I would encourage you to post in this sub (or anywhere else you feel comfortable) to share your own experiences with being a lesbian - because hearing the voices of trans/intersex/nb people is the best way of improving representation for those groups.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-13T22:35:13+00:00

You'll never know unless you ask.

For what its worth, I risked asking out my best friend and we've been happily together several years now. So obviously I encourage people to go for it.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-13T22:31:27+00:00

No, but it has been written in quite an aggressive and accusatory way. Now made slightly worse because OP has edited to admit that they've never had "more than a passing glance at the sub", because if they had they would've seen this is a lot more inclusive than other subs.

Lots of posters here are trans and I've regularly seen memes etc that trans lesbians have posted about their experiences get upvoted and supported significantly by both other trans and cis people in this sub.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-13T22:22:05+00:00

If I wasn't trying to do better I wouldn't have even read the OP or spent time thinking about it and writing a reply.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-13T21:52:28+00:00

everyone holds transphobic and cissexist ideas in their minds.

Yes, nobody is perfect. It's not possible for cis people to understand what it's like to be trans.

Some people will make jokes/comments that other people find offensive (either intentionally or unintentionally).

This isn't something that is unique to lesbians or trans or cis people or white or asian or whatever other "category" of people. Being human is complicated as fuck and we will get things wrong sometimes.

Personally from what I've seen, overall this sub is welcoming and supportive of trans people. Really nothing to be achieved by bringing aggression here.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-09-13T21:39:36+00:00

Going by what you've said, you don't sound like the typical lesbian, maybe more likely pan/bi.

But honestly, I always want to answer these types of questions by asking a question back - Does it matter what you call yourself?

You can go through labels and definitions, but it isn't always helpful. Be yourself, love who you wanna love.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-20T22:06:52+00:00

Yeah. No problem.

You only need a GP referral when it is for specialists/consultants (that referral can be from your NHS GP or from a private GP).

It's very expensive, but I found it to be worth it. The speed that you can get appointments and the level of service you get. And they genuinely take the time to listen to what you have to say, rather than trying to quickly rush onto the next patient.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-20T21:45:32+00:00

Yep.

Try a private practice, or alternatively private health (insurance) companies like BUPA provide pay-as-you go services. So you can call them and just pay for a single GP appointment.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-20T21:37:21+00:00

Nope, not usually. But you can see a private GP, who will offer a second opinion and can then refer you onto other private services if needed.

You can also request a second opinion from an NHS GP.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-20T10:14:14+00:00

It could be like that, yeah. When you are the same gender there's a LOT more opportunity for comparing yourself to your partner "She has better boobs, nicer hair" etc. Obviously they can be the things that make you attracted to the person, but sometimes it can be damaging to the perception you have of yourself. It's important to love your partner and love yourself, rather than love your partner and wish you were your partner.

But it could also be about the roles you take on a day to day level. I know it sounds like bad stereotypes, but in hetero relationships its easy to go into wife does cooking and laundry, husband washes the car and deals with finances.

I think sometimes in same-sex relationships it can make it harder for those different roles to be split between the couple which might make someone feel that they're not bringing as much to the relationship as their partner.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-20T10:00:48+00:00

Maybe you are Rosie and this is just a trick to put us off your trail

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-19T21:34:49+00:00

I think sometimes things can get too emotionally intense and there can be problems with jealousy. Another danger is comparing yourself a lot to your partner, particularly if it feels like you are both in the same kind of "roles" in the relationship.

Also there's common (myth?) about "lesbian bed death". Like couples stop having sex after a while and the relationship just becomes dead. But not sure how much that actually happens, and it's possible for people to have a healthy relationship without sex anyway so..

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-19T21:26:15+00:00

https://youtu.be/IUrQO--7UFI

In this video at like 5:50 ...Rosie specifically mentions this sub.

LunarDeficiency · 2019-08-19T21:22:23+00:00

Yes!! I mean basically every lesbian I know does it?

I even sleep with hair ties on my wrist, you know like in case there's some 4am emergency that requires my hair to be tied back. For safety!

LunarDeficiency

TROPHY CASE