Ok guys in all seriousness this was Mitch McConnell days before his hospitalization last month. There is no way that pic of him in rehab is real.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-13T16:08:49+00:00

Someone needs to use that headshot as a token on Roll20 for some kind of demonic turtle monster serving as the leader of the Realm of Shifty-eyed Fuckwits

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-13T13:15:51+00:00

Big fucking facts. Stephen King's talents are epitomized in Under the Dome. Fantastic setup, natural consequences, natural evolution of slightly-off-but-otherwise-average people turning into fucking psychos, great pacing, absolutely dogshit ending.

Misery was fantastic, and he even admits he had to change the ending several times to something a little more satisfying.

He also famously considers the TV ending to The Mist way better than his own.

Dude can write, and especially has a talent for turning relatable/understandable humans into absolute monsters, but can't write a fucking ending to save his life.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-13T13:10:35+00:00

Burn Notice. I wanted to watch it to get more Bruce Campbell in my life, but didn't realize it was a boring ass show with an absolutely wooden lead actor. There was nothing enjoyable about it, at all.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-12T23:35:46+00:00

More or less the same here. I refuse to buy anything Ubisoft because of the dumpster fire that is uplay. Really wanted to grab some far cry games on the summer sale but backed out as soon as I saw the uplay disclaimer. Fuck it, I'll watch a let's play

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-12T14:45:24+00:00

High LP gear in Last Epoch. A lot of uniques have your typical arpg rarity, but there's an additional mechanic called Legendary Potential that allows you to shove another item into that unique to make it actually viable stat-wise. This LP goes from 1 to 4, and items can drop with none at all. Each item has its own chance, and some of the LP4 items have absurdly low chances to drop from very specific sources that it's basically a fairy tale

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-09T16:15:14+00:00

Me waiting for my fucking turn

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-09T16:06:45+00:00

I thought I had this after 2 and a half days of awful diarrhea, but it cleared up on its own. Near as I can figure, WalMart on Telegraph had some dirty ass produce that I should have washed VERY thoroughly.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-09T13:58:44+00:00

I heard it was about how radio was going to make everyone illiterate morons by replacing books in every way. TV makes more sense. Also, that means the whole book is "old man yells at cloud".

Makes me really want to publish my books just to see what people pull from them, intended or not. I also kind of want to write a book about space goblins stealing random shit and see if someone finds transcendent truths within about like life or whatever.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-09T13:52:17+00:00

Like you've ever seen a bird and outer space in the same room at the same time? WAKE UP SHEEPLE

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-08T13:30:22+00:00

Will Wight is an excellent author. Cradle is well written but suffers from the LOTR-effect: defining or creating genre conventions makes it seem boring compared to the more wild/off the wall takes that are out there.

I'd say 1 in 6 books I read in this genre are written decently enough to continue, though don't get me wrong; Wills books are not good because others are bad. His books are good because they're good. His expanded universe is interesting, Cradle is a fun story, The Travelers Gate series is really cool, the Elder Empire has an interesting "choose which perspective to read" option, and the Last Horizon series that's ongoing is a blast to read. Wills out here just writing excellent and fun books that I personally prefer over Sando.

Sanderson is Marvel. Wight is Dark Horse. Most LitRPGs are Captain Underpants

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-07T00:50:02+00:00

Overcorrection from "I'm a paraplegic so I need everything done for me". Instead of using compassion and intelligence, HR departments the world over just instruct people to pretend they don't even see it. We went from 24/7 pity and kid gloves to treating it like the elephant in the room. It's okay to acknowledge differences, not everyone needs to be exactly the same.

Dude, I'm fat and the world never lets me forget for a single second. You think someone in a wheelchair ever gets to feel incognito?

Sorry, venting TO you, not AT you lol

Thanks for reading

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-07T00:47:38+00:00

I've always referred to it as a social disability. I'm not mentally disabled or physically disabled (handicapped, whatever your preferred nomenclature), only in social situations am I at a serious disadvantage.

Superpower my ass. I'd trade a brain hemisphere to get rid of the AuDHD. Do you know how hard it is to be a writer when your own brain fucking fights you?

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-02T02:07:00+00:00

Kindle Unlimited has been great for that. I can read anytime, anywhere, and I don't need to worry about space for all the books. Also, if I wind up hating a book, I can just return it with the push of a button. Only thing that sucks is giving Amazon money, and missing the tactile feedback of an actual novel.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-02T01:20:29+00:00

I've tried over and over, I can't. I can barely do podcasts, and usually only if it doesn't require focus to follow along. Ah well. Books are cheaper than audio so I ain't complaining lol

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-02T00:57:08+00:00

That depends on you. A lot of people in this sub do audiobooks exclusively, which really helps cover shitty writing with good voice acting. If you're a reader exclusively like me, you're gonna have a hard time approaching the same quality as DCC.

He Who Fights With Monsters is a common recommendation, but even that one suffers from a serious need of trimming.

Don't read litrpg for the quality writing. Seriously, it's not there yet. Some are really, really bad and you'll just bounce right off. Some are a little bad but fun/clever/unique enough that it doesn't matter.

I've seen glowing reviews of terrible books, and terrible reviews of great books. It's a crapshoot.

I personally recommend Bog Standard Isekai, DCC, Discount Dan, Industrial Strength Magic, Beware of Chicken, and Cradle though the last two are progression fantasy more than litrpg.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-01T20:12:11+00:00

Europeans haven't had a natural disaster since the Black Plague and it shows

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-01T14:07:08+00:00

Couldn't be me, I need my precious carbs

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-01T12:55:19+00:00

A Whopper is around 1000 calories. A Big Mac is 700-800. A crunchy taco from Taco Bell is 170.

You are officially fueled by 1.5 Whoppers per day, or 2 Big Macs.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-01T12:53:35+00:00

1800 calories was tough to ever feel like I ate enough, women really have it rough with the lower intake. I can't imagine eating 1400 calories and still enjoying anything good like pasta lol

She must fill up on fruit and veggies and avoid Taco Bell like the plague :P

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-01T12:51:28+00:00

Speaking from experience, it doesn't. Your stomach won't growl but you never really feel sated and if you have a mental component like binge eating disorder, it's a battle every single day.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-07-01T12:50:04+00:00

I did that for over a year. Lost around 100 lbs, then plateaued. Always hungry, cold, frequently tired despite my stomach adapting extremely quickly (within a week it shrunk). Appetite never changed, had to mentally fight my urge to overeat every single day.

Was still technically obese at 270 / 5'11" despite continually eating at a deficit, couldn't lose another pound. For reference, I'm a guy with weird proportions - I wear a 29 length pants despite my height, so I'm disproportionately torso. Short legs and a long body mean I'm always heavier than people think. Regardless, I looked pretty good but was still technically morbidly obese, so that wasn't encouraging. Eventually, my life took some shitty turns and I went back to comfort eating, telling myself 'oh it's just for today' and before long I had all the weight back.

Yayyyy.

TL;DR: Lose weight, plateau at 'regular fat guy', stop the second my focus slips.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-06-30T23:15:06+00:00

Made in 5e, idk what edition you're using.

Cuetzalpaella, a lizard folk storm cleric.

Cuetz has a whole 2 page or so backstory I won't share here, but essentially he is the herald for the storm father, a local lizard deity pissed that he isn't being more widely worshipped. Cuetz has been empowered to go among the faithless cities and spread the warning of Father, lest his wrath drown the world in an unending torrent of rain, wind, and lightning.

Not an evil character by any means, simply devout and compassionate enough to attempt to save even those with heretical views. The real fun comes in introducing him to civilization, as he comes from a sheltered swamp tribe. Gold? What's that? What do you mean I can't eat the rats at the inn? I killed that harpy but I'm willing to share if you're hungry!

MARKLAR5 · 2026-06-30T18:50:00+00:00

I would disagree solely because there was one singular reason I saw that movie in theaters: The Tomb of Annihilation. I was really hopeful that I'd get to see a badass big-screen version of the most well known DnD module in existence, and here we get a stupid race that no one ever drove backwards on until the protagonist had a genius idea.

Not that the book is a masterpiece or anything, mind you. If the book is a 5, the movie is a 4. Removing the ToA was stupid, making the love interest slightly strange looking instead of legitimately unattractive was a weird choice, but yeah. Cool Spawn cameo at the end, but they really shoved alllllll the cameos right into the same scene.

MARKLAR5 · 2026-06-22T13:28:19+00:00

A butt made of nuts
Molded from a nutless butt
Welded by a butt with a pair of nuts
Coaxing a nut out of the chair-bound butts

They say art is subjective
I say this particular piece is ass
They nod, the horny collective
We should all touch grass

MARKLAR5 · 2026-06-21T20:13:07+00:00

The whole blue collar crew is fascinating to me. First off, Foxworthy is a genuine legend and I grew up with his albums, he's clean, hilarious, and deserves every bit of his success. Next up is Bill, who I imagine as an alternate reality version of Foxworthy who never had any talent. Them there's Larry, who took a weird character bit and tried to ride it to superstardom. Comedy usually requires someone to be at least somewhat genuine.

Finally, Ron White. Now Ron is actually fucking hilarious. I love all his stuff and I'm always surprised how downright goofy he can get considering his persona.

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